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I just had an epiphany about why many women are not into nice men.
Could it be because they have learned to believe that nice people do not truly exist? That any man who is nice is only doing it for sex of some other benefit.
I'm curious if that is why some feel this way.
| yes | 32 | |
| no | 37 |
People are afraid of getting hurt.
When you're with a jerk, you expect to be hurt but when you're with a really great guy, it's worse when you're hurt by him.
Because being a "nice guy" isn't the end all be all to being a good man to be in a relationship with.
I've been with plenty of nice guys who would do anything for me. Many of them were also obsessive and more emotionally needy than I was. Having to sit through the grueling emotional dishouts that many nice guys have given me in regards to why they are so emotionally damaged and afraid of having their love rejected - my friend, we have been together for two weeks.
Call me cold and callous, but many nice guys that I have been with are overly insecure, needy and clingy and there's no room for that in an adult relationship. I don't go for jerks, my current is a very nice guy who too has been left for being a nice guy. Many women enjoy rejection and have Daddy issues and continue the cycle by picking jerks to father their children and it's a damned shame. The fact remains though, there is so much more to finding the right man than being a nice guy.
So tired of all these dudes that think just being a nice guy earns you some kind of right to be with someone. Yeah we get it, you're all so much better than...not nice..guys. What have we all been thinking? Women are so stupid, this whole time they've been trying to find someone with quality when they should've been getting with the dudes that are really good at Call of Duty and know how to hold a door open. Because if you havent heard ladies, theyre really nice guys, and that's what you say youre looking for, so it must be the only thing you're looking for.
Lol, basically this. OP is kind of right, when a guy is nice to me with no reason why he "loves" me, I'm not interested. Lots of guys are nice to me and say they are attracted to me but we have nothing in common other than being single which they seem to think is enough.
And, maybe this is just me but I'm not exactly a "nice" girl. I act nice to strangers out of mere politeness, and this may be misleading, but truly I love things that some find "offensive". I wish guys were not so afraid to show their true self- everyone gets annoyed at times, and if you don't... You're either fake or extremely boring. And this is why I don't like "nice guys".
Most people are 'nice'. Being 'nice' is not the only thing people look for in a romantic partner. People are way more complex than that.
This doesn't just apply to guys, it goes for the gals too.
Bullshit. Some girls like "nice" guys and some girls like "bad" guys. Some girls pay more attention to looks and some girls pay more attention to personality. Maybe if "nice" guys stopped chasing after the girls with big tits and perfect features, they could get with other "nice" girls. It goes both ways.
If you could answer that age old why do girls like "bad boys" question, you would go down in history as THE man who understood women.
I heard somewhere about a theory that women are attracted to men who are more physically aggressive than others, because they're the ones who'll take care of her against other men ... could be bullshit, could be true, I have no idea.
Certainly I've nearly always been attracted to bad boys and bad girls which has done me no good at all.
CAUTION - Long comment!
I don't care about that stereotype. I was raised to be a gentleman and a good person. I can be the typical asshole with bling and a pocket knife at the pub who smacks women's asses and exclaims "Dayumn biach!!! Dat azz", but I chose not to. It's not who I am.
The thing that annoys me is the fact that the media destroys what the concepts of a good man and a douche are.
Today most women (younger ones at least. The old-school generation are above this) are drawn to the stereotypical douchebag. Thinks the world of himself. Gets drunk and thinks he is cool. Is too violent. Is cocky. When in a car is the biggest idiot on the road and treats women like objects. Also if he fistpumps, exclaims "Boom" for no reason - even better!
However, at the same time women do not want a jerk, cause he treats them badly. They want a good guy. Like someone from a cheesy movie, who is willing to "catch a grenade" for them, sticks to them like glue, or some other non-important crap! They want such a man, but only in their fantasies. Cause, when they meet that nice guy, who is lost in their eyes and will love them forever, they exclaim that he isn't a real man. He is a wimp.
I think that such women are idiots. In a serious relationship you need a smart, caring, well-manared, loving man with a good personality at your side that won't let you down. If you don't want such a man, he should be fortunate enough to know that you are a bitch! And you (girls) should be more open to knowing the guy. A chat won't kill you. And talking doesn't translate into "I want to fuck you like an animal on the table!". Most of the time we want to talk. Us (men) are people. Cause I know girls that I went to chat up and they told me to go away and that they are not interested, or to lie that they are in a relationship. Hey! I want to talk to you, not fuck you. We are just losing the "human" inside.
NOTE: This works both ways, but this comment is way too long.
Real men and women are becoming an endangered species...
Good thing that I managed to find my dream girl, before we go extinct XD XD XD
Whenever a I hear a girl complain about how "all guys are jerks" I always tell them "the only guys who are jerks are the ones you spread your legs for. There are good men out there but girls like you just don't appreciate them." It shuts them right up.
-Sigh- Let me get it out of the way for you.
"Nice guys don't exist!"
"There aren't many nice guys!"
"I do go for nice guys!...It just happened to be that the ones I chose had a different view of what nice means..."
Yada yada.
I don't think women simply go for "the nice guy", it's pretty obvious at this point. Am I saying nobody has? No, I would just think the majority of guys fantasized about don't tend to be the nice ones that help and respect everyone around them. That being said, they are entitled to like whomever they wish, it is their choice. Aslong as I don't have to hear the aftermath of their choices in people or the "There are no nice guys" line, I'm fine with it...Being that I am somewhat of an asshole (or maybe a mix).
How about because SHE'S NOT A NICE GIRL.
Girls are attracted to men who they have stuff in COMMON with. I don't have anything in common with a nice boy, so I'm not attracted to them.
No. It has nothing to do with how "nice" a guy is. Men make that excuse up because they refuse to face the fact that a woman JUST ISN'T INTERESTED. You're a prime example. Rather than thinking of a different approach, you assume there MUST be something wrong with all the women in the world and ask why WOMEN don't like "nice guys". Why not ask why men who are unsuccessful with women are so emotionally unintelligent?
In some cases, women are like nascar. They go around the same track over and over, jockeying for position where all the excitement is. When they get tired of the drama, they make 'pit stops.' Nice guys are like pit stops - some time for women to refuel, eventually get bored, and go back on the track with the bad guys, drama, and excitement. Where these women finish is where they started with the bad guys making things happen, while somewhere in the middle of it all are nice guys waiting for something to happen along pit row.
Not all women are like this, but they do exist.
Nice can be very boring, but it doesn't mean nasty is the only alternative. It's possible for a man to be both nice and exciting. That's probably closer to what women want than a violent ingrate or a tedious bore.
at Fall_leaves .... u have the right idea in my opinion.. then again some guys take a bit to show their true colors. I was w a guy for 2 yrs and it was all pretend he wasnt like what he had been leading on at all.