Is this a normal level of broodiness?!

9 Comments

I'm in my mid-twenties and I think about having a baby every single day - at least three times a day. I have decided on names, talk about parenting techniques with my partner (and how we would give a child a stable upbringing etc.) It just feels like THE most important thing in my life. Oh and I sometimes cry at adverts on TV with babies in them. And when I spend time with a baby or a little one, I just feel so content and fulfilled? I confess, I also have a few baby clothes (mostly unisex) in a box. I bought them in sales and the idea is that I can give them to other people as gifts for their babies - and I have done that, but honestly, I want to just keep some of them. The other thing is... whenever someone I know gets pregnant and has a baby, I get jealous. I'm very happy for them, but also get this searing jealousy. I'm not proud of it, but I just can't help it. I would say my 'maternal instinct' kicked in around age 20 or 21 and has got more intense since.

Are these levels of broodiness in line with the average or am I off the scale here? I know it's a massive challenge physically, mentally and emotionally, but there's a big part of me that just thinks bring it on. Like I said it just feels like the most important thing. Input appreciated. Thanks. : )

A bit more than the average 18
Totally normal 8
Really OTT - you're obsessed! 12
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 9 )
  • squirrelgirl
    11 years ago

    You sound totally normal, and given the fact that you are even more well-prepared than most, I say you should go for it. Personally I have never had the desire nor the maternal drive to have children, but I'm not bothered by other women who do (unlike some other child-free people, like the person up there who referred to babies as "crotch-droppings", which I found to be harsh and disrespectful.)

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Darkoil
    11 years ago

    A lot of people I know failed in school, are complete fucking imbeciles and yet they have children and think they can bring them up correctly.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
      -
    • flowergirl87
      11 years ago

      You do have to question some people's parenting skills.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • Ibelievethis
    11 years ago

    I would say you're feelings are normal. A lot of women are broody from the age of 18-23 due to hormones.

    I used to feel exactly the same as you although you are obviously stronger than me as where you say you are are whilst, yes understandably jealous of pregnant women, well for me I was just big time jealous and being happy for people was just never going to happen.

    Also you say spending times with other people's babies' gives you fulfillment which again is also apluadable as when I was TTC I wouldn't even look at someone else's babies. My attitude was It should be own child I'm fussing over not someone else's!. I'm not proud but we can't help the way we feel.

    Good luck. I hope you are blessed with the gift of parenthood very soon. xxx

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
      -
    • flowergirl87
      11 years ago

      Thanks for your reply and your kind wishes (and for being so honest about your own previous situation). I'm not TTC yet as I know I'm/we're not quite ready. But I sort of dream of the day... whilst also being scared of it!? Partly because I understand the gravity of having a child and want to be the best parent I can be (without being a perfectionist about it).

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • ProseAthlete
    11 years ago

    Does your partner actually want a baby, or is he/she humoring you while you natter on about how wonderful it would be to have a drooling crotch-dumpling of your very own? You're young. Really, really young, at least for parenthood. Have you finished school? Do you have other aspirations and dreams, or do you feel your sole goal is to breed a passel of kids? Are you and your partner committed to one another for life, either through legal marriage or emotionally/spiritually? Are you wealthy enough to afford the $15k or so in medical bills for prenatal care and a healthy birth? Are you prepared for the physical, financial and emotional drains of a not-so-healthy birth that could leave you incapable of realizing any other dreams such as owning a home, going back to work or retiring early?

    I know I sound sooo old for asking that, but truly, those things are important if you want to talk about giving your future child(ren) a stable life.

    I'm trying to be sympathetic here, but I remember that pregnancy was something I totally feared from the moment I became sexually active to...well, today, if I'm honest about it. To me, it seems totally OTT, but I think of babies as nine-month parasitic infections of the womb, so take that for what it's worth.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    -1
    -1
      -
    • flowergirl87
      11 years ago

      Thanks for replying. Yes, my partner does too. We started talking about it a couple of years ago. And we are committed and have been together for five years. I don't feel having children is my only goal, no, but it just feels extremely important.

      I'm not that young for parenthood - I'm in my mid-twenties. I think between 25 and 30 is average? I finished school seven years ago and have since got a diploma and a degree and have been working for almost two years after a short period of unemployment (not easy to get a job atm). Also, I live in the UK, so luckily, we have the NHS. So the financial side of things isn't such an issue. Which I know makes us very lucky.

      I do understand that it's a huge thing to take on and know that I won't fully get it until it's happening, but that's normal. It's not a fleeting fantasy based on 'she's got one so I want one', or anything like that.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
        -
      • ProseAthlete
        11 years ago

        Whoops! I apologize -- I misread you and thought you were still 20 years old, not mid-20s. That changes my perspective quite a bit.

        You do sound as though you've thought it through thoroughly. I wish I could change my answer from "OTT" to "a bit more than average" or even "totally normal." You seem very together and will probably make a wonderful mom -- well, in the UK, you'd be a mum, I suppose. :)

        Comment Hidden ( show )
        0
        0
          -
        • flowergirl87
          11 years ago

          lol no worries! Thanks and yes, I'd be mum. I also think 20 is a bit young. But it does partly depend on the individual of course.

          Comment Hidden ( show )
          0
          0