Is there anything i can do to make my relationship better?

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The type of guy my bf is I believe is good for me knowing myself. However, I don't believe the type of person I am is good for him. Is this okay? Is it normal? Is there something I can do to fix this so our relationship gets better?

He is everything I would want in a guy; responsible, reasonable, independent, smart, and funny. Looks wise? Yeah he basically is what I drew in my head; masculine, clean, knows his style, knows what he likes. Overall, a confident guy. I believe this type of guy is good for me and I finally found him. The bad thing is I might lack those things like he's 100% of them and I'm only 50%. I can also tell by the looks he makes or sometimes statements that he's not feeling me. The good thing is he makes me want to be better but I don't think he knows that. Part of it is probably cause I haven't told him but I haven't found the right time to tell him or know how to. I fear he'll get awkward about it but in a way feel good he inspires me. Something that I don't think I would want to tell him though is how I wish he can look up to me but I know he doesn't. I'm sure he'll feel bad but I don't know if he'll be compassionate about it because he doesn't know how to and because he probably knows it's true that he doesn't look up to me.

So I think it comes down to I feel "not good enough" for him, one of those cases. I am a confident person when I'm not with him but when I am or just the fact that he is my bf, I feel more intimidated and insecure. I wish he can look up to me like I look up to him. I wish I can be good for him like he is good for me.

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Based on 2 votes (1 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    If you're feeling bad about yourself when with him, but ok if not, surely this is an indication you're not right for each other?

    It's your own self-esteem you need to be working on rather than the relationship.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      But he makes me want to be better. What if I'm a bitch? I have to find someone who accepts that I'm a bitch as opposed to someone who makes me want to be better? Not saying I am actually a bitch but thats how I feel about my flaws. I want to better them and hes the only one who motivates me to.

      At the same time, my intimidation gets to me and I become insecure and I guess he sees that and he gets turned off by it. I cant fake confidence like other people can. So idk...it sucks how Im not good for him but he is good for me. I know I can be good for him but like you said, I do have to work on my self-esteem but that doesn't mean Im gonna leave him and work on me. Thats why I want to work on my relationship too but idk how.

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      • Ellenna
        8 years ago

        I can't see how any healthiness in a relationship where one person feels inferior and not measuring up to the other person, nor do I see how one person can work on a relationship without the other person being involved. Have you actually talked to him about how you feel and asked him how he feels about the relationship? For all you know he's happy with it just as it is. You're guessing about how he feels: what's the point of that?

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  • Noli
    8 years ago

    I made an account to respond to this really late
    I think thatyou should ask him what he thinks
    I am the i guess Main Provider in my relationship she doesnt have a job or car or can even drive for that matter but i in no way think less of her i actually enjoy providing for her MAKES ME FEEL GOOD as a significant other if she says she wants a job i encourage her but if she doesnt have one im equally content

    so i say you ask him and see what he says because he might like how the relationship is

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      Well luckily, since this post, things have been gettng better. He has shown me he is happy with me and wants to be with me. But um I still feel the same, I know its terrible. But I do feel a little more confident after all these improvements knowing he does prob like how things are like you said. So now its really up to me, myself, and I to work on my self-esteem as an individual.

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  • NathanScot
    8 years ago

    Absolutely lass....first thing you should do is to stop asking relationship advice on a site dedicated to wankers,pervs,pedo's and serial cheaters.

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