Is the history of my sexuality normal?

I am a 23 year old male and I am questioning my sexuality. I will give a detailed history of it because I want to know others thoughts about it. I remember that when is was 5 or 6, My older brother and his friends were looking at porn and I saw it. It was also around this time that I started looking it up on my own. I remember looking at it when I was 9 and getting caught. All the porn I had looked at was all women. I masturbated and had dry orgasms before i even knew what i was doing. When i was 13 and in 8th grade I started feeling a very strong attraction to other guys. I found myself "peering in" at the urinals during gym class. There were certain boys I wanted to see naked more than others. I have been masturbating nearly every day since this time. It intensified in high school, and I started looking under the stalls to try to see boy's penises while they were shitting. Looking back, I wish that my high school had required showers after p.e because this would have given me a plethora of teen dick images to masturbate to. I would not have had to spy on people because it would have just been normal to have seen their dicks on a daily basis. Every time i heard a boy shitting, I got hard because I knew his penis was fully exposed. I still fantasize about guys from high school. I eventually stopped spying on guys because it's immoral and illegal, but I still have these feelings. I almost never look at porn because I don't want to go to hell. In college, I have felt the same way. One time, I was in a stall and I heard a guy masturbating in the stall next to me. I started fapping and he noticed. He squatted on the floor, but I didn't look so he wouldn't see me. He started toughing my legs from under the stall. I really wanted to see his dick, but i didn't go for it because of diseases and hell. I know he climaxed because I heard him use toilet paper and then leave. After he left, I climaxed. I have masturbated at college a few other times, but i have never exposed myself to other people. As a general rule, I am attracted to grown guys with pubic hair. I shaved penis is completely unattractive to me. I really want to see the hair around the penis more than the penis itself. When I masturbate, I do it to things I have seen, heard or read. I picture mostly penises that I have seen, sounds of mainly guys moaning, and stories of guys masturbating together. I also picture heterosexual couples fucking, but I focus on the man. I have never been in love but I want to fall in love with a woman. I don't want to be gay because I will never feel comfortable satisfying those urges because of my religion. I want to be straight so I can have sex and not be afraid of the consequences. This of course will be after marriage. I don't deny my homosexual feelings, but I want to be straight instead. I have discussed this with my therapist before. I want to know the heterosexual desires that I had before puberty changed to homosexual desires during puberty. I know that there can be environmental and genetic factors for this. I did want to be a girl when I was in elementary school, but I have no desire for it now. I have only had 1 real friend, and he ghosted me so now that position is open. I admit that I am attracted to him and I have had sexual dreams about him, but I would never go for it for the reasons that I mentioned. I want to know why the sexual desires that I had in childhood would have during puberty. I would think that it would be the opposite because human instinct is to reproduce. Is it normal for this to happen? Has anyone who on here had similar experiences? I just want to live a good pleasurable life and still go to heaven. Please give me your thoughts on this.