Is my relationship normal?

Im a stay at home mom with a 1 year old. My husband works from 6-7am, until 5-9 pm on weekdays. He pays all the bills, i do ALL the cooking, cleaning and everything.

He says because i dont work and im home all day, i shouldnt be tired.

Most days i overlook his attitude and his words.. but some days it REALLY picks at me cus i always imagined finding a man to take care of me, not the other way around. Or that i'd atleast get more respect than this. i feel like cinderella..

He does work hard most days, though he never spoke to me enough to actually tell me what exactly he does. All i know is that he makes boats and comes home covered in dust and fiberglass.
But with several other men and women all doin different parts of the boat.. truly how hard can it be? honestly..

Anyway at home, he never does anything. Unless i am too tired to cook or clean and take a break but then suddenly im useless and he shudnt have to do anything himself since i dont work.

Most days i try to keep the house presentable (though my 1 y/o undoes everything i do in less than half the time) for when he comes home. I try to guess when he'll be home to at least have dinner started by the time he walks in.

Somestimes i get a thank you after he's eaten or when the house is very clean.. but somedays he makes too much of a mess and its my fault.
Everyday he comes home, strips outta his clothes and leaves them everywhere. By the door, by the shoes, in the bathroom floor, living room floor, kitchen floor. anywhere. He eats outta bowls and plates and leaves them where ever. mostly just on the counter, sometimes under the couch. doesnt rinse them or anything.
drinks cans of pop and leaves them too. and im supposed to clean up after him. as well as cook, clean all those dishes i just cooked with.. plus the ones he used and never washed filled at the bottom with dry milk and sugar...

And he hardly plays with our daughter. he'll pick her up every now and then and hug her or maybe play with her for literally a minute but then he's too tired and "put her to bed so i can eat in peace, or smoke a cigarette" when i ask him to bath her or put her in bed, its all half hearted. He wont even tuck her in or make she her window curtain is closed. or make sure she has her bed-bear. He just puts her in the crib, throws a blanket over her, gives her a sippy cup and runs outta there. I almost always have to go in after cus she just ccries. and i honestly cant think of a time where he ever bathed her..

Anyway, in our bedroom, he dumped all my baby's old tiny but clean clothes outta the plastic bags and onto the closet carpet where our leaky water tank makes sure that carpet is always wet. So now all those clothes stink and are prolly ruined.
But when i asked him why he did that, he said i was bitching and nagging. like ??
He always complains about everything i cook cus its "just ok".
Sometimes he just plain wont eat. If theres beans or rice, he dont like it. Or he's "tired" of certain foods. But never says what he actually likes to eat.

When he wants to be intimate, suddenly he knows "please" and suddenly he becomes so ssweet and funny (sometimes). Othertimes he just gets in my face with his d__k out and just tells me to "go ahead"

If he's not playin a video game for hours, then he's watching the entire season of a show on netflix. If i want to watch something else, he's all mad and pissy and "i miss being single"

Sometimes i think maybe im losing my mind. Am i really just nagging and being bitchy? But other times i assume all relationships are like this. Righht?
But then i see videos on the facebook where people, celebrities even, who are men playin with their kids and saying "oh, family first.." or "daddy's little girl" but my youngun hasnt even said "da-da" more than once. she doesnt bother him if he's not obviously playin with her. She doesnt follow him around at all, but she's connected to my hip no matter how far away i walk.

Am i just losing my mind? i mean i live in the middle of nowhere, my closest of 2 nieghbors (my mom and a crazy cat lady) are over 500 feet away.. which isnt much.. we live in a tiny, non diverse town.. population like 700 sometthing. The next town over is popu. 2300.. so yea .. tiny towns = silent strange people .. And i haardly ever leave our property.. unless for walmart..

So am i losing my damn mind or [ is my relationship normal ]????!!????

Voting Results
13% Normal
Based on 39 votes (5 yes)
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Comments ( 48 )
  • JD777

    Not all relationships are like this. He sounds self-absorbed and dependent. Did he go straight from living with a doting mother to living with you? I'm at a bit of a loss as to advice, but he needs help to understand the value you bring, how to be a man, and how to be a father.

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    • Actually, hilariously, yes. He did come from living with his mother. He was on the brim of being kicked out when i sent for him then. But i wudnt call her doting.. as she only seems to be nice from a distance. A Loong distance.

      I wasnt so much as lookin for advice as i was lookin for ppl to just tell me to leave him. lol

      ive been contemplating that for a while. Just wanted to see ppls opinion from a 3rd point of view

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    • Asstastics

      What kind of help? You are quite the master of the obvious. At least think about it for a minute or two and give her some actionable suggestions for God's sake.

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      • JD777

        Instead of commenting to whine about my comment, why don't YOU offer her some advice.

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        • Asstastics

          Glad you asked. It's basically an issue of economy of effort. I can apply lots of effort to fully utilize my pea size brain and possibly produce something marginally useful. Or, I can apply a minimal bit of effort to motivate you to use your super size Ph.D. brain and everyone benefits from the amazing wisdom you are capable of creating.

          Even the smallest and most humble of us all survive in the diversity of life by economizing our capabilities. It's the pervasive result of Darwinian selection.

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          • JD777

            Feeling a little insecure, are we?

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            • Asstastics

              Not at all. I'm feeling hopeful. Hoping that you will arrogantly accept my assessment of your capabilities by putting pressure on yourself to perform. Until we all see comments befitting of your educational credentials, we can only conclude that behind your mask of authority there is a fragile ego with critical reasoning skills no better than average.

              Now, get busy. Don't disappoint us.

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  • Ellenna

    He's a throwback to the 50's. You ARE working every day and longer hours than he does, always on call, no sick leave, no holidays and an arsehole of a "boss".

    And no, all relationships aren't like this: some men don't expect their wives to be servants and some men enjoy being fathers.

    Can you make contact with other young mums in your area or can you at least go and stay with family occasionally to get away from this life of drudgery so you can clear your mind and work out what to do about your life?

    I wish you well

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    • You are the only who sees it this way. To everyone else, gettin paid to work and payin bills trumps being there for your family.

      But thanks for the well wishes.

      Im sooo glad i saved ur comment for last. It made me feel just a little bit better than i felt right before i was about to log out.

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      • Ellenna

        I'm glad if I helped! Good luck to you, I hope you can find a way to change your situation soon

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  • riffez133

    helll noooo beat hhis ass and divorce him or what my wife did was ,ake another guy take better care of you as like a friend go out more with him stay the noite but be faithful just fuck with his head

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    • i tried that. I tried making him jealous by messaging a guy that liked to call me names like baby for a few weeks.. I wud delete some of the messages to fuck with him and make it seem like i was hiding something. But he just called me a whore.

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  • jethro

    Show him the door. There are tons of men out there who would treat you respectfully. But, your lot in life should not be to have someone take care of you. You are supposed to be an adult. You take care of your children. Your mate should expect the same care as you expect. So plan on getting a job and pulling your weight or else keep your complaints to yourself.

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    • I know, i hate it just as much as it sounds pathetic. But i had to finish school first. Higher education equals better job opportunities. And i wont get a career by working minimum wage jobs my whole life. But i take care of my child. He may pay for the lights to stay on, but money doesnt raise children. Money doesnt make a family whole. I take care of him like he is my child also. I damn near do everything but wipe his ass. Which is WRONG on so many levels. But god forbid i ask him to distract our baby for 5 minutes so i can cook or shower or pick up the floor real quick and you would have thought i was asking him to cut his ears off. So most times when im cookin, theres a baby at my feet, or i shower with the curtain open cus otherwise if i close the door she bangs on it and cries while he plays mkx. I dont know why but i CAN NOT stand hearing her cry. It makes me feel very edgy, restless, like a smoker without cigarettes feigning. "I NEED A CIGARETTE OR ILL DIE!" I feel like "OMG MAKE HER STOP CCRYING OR I'LL DIE!" sorry i cant help that..

      And by dreaming of someone taking care of me, i meant we'd both equally cook and clean, both raise our child, both put effort in the relationship. She doesnt even get excited anymore when he comes home. She just looks at him and continues her path of throwing things she finds funny unless he calls out to her. My nephew goes RUNNING out the door when he comes home because he scares him. My nephew is 9. He doesnt even have to say anything anymore when he comes home and my nephew is GONE like the wind.

      Being with him is like being with a stuffed toy. I love it and love it and love it some more. But it just stares back at me blankly, it doesnt return the love.
      People tell me to wait, and wait and wait and "he'll grow up" "he's a nice guy" "he's ___'s father, he'll come around"
      But he's 3 years older than me yet somehow i feel 15 years older than him..

      But im wrong for wantin to dump and replace him?

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  • harddrystickysocks

    THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS WHAT RACE AND RELIGION YOUR FAMILY IS. All joking aside though. Seriously, was your husband brought up in a family who holds these traditional and outdated mind sets about parenting And relationships. Maybe you should try to talk to him. If all else fails there is always electro anal probe stimulation.

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    • Anal probe? DETAILS, details ..!

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  • Elixis

    Take the both of you to marriage counseling, you and your husband need to solve this problem. Your husband obviously has an outdated attitude about household roles, and you two seem like you're not talking about it healthily with each other.
    If you think that you can't, remember you have a daughter who is seeing your husband doing these things and you at home everyday and is learning that it's okay for a man to be doing things like that and for you to be taking it like that and it will affect her through adulthood.
    And no, all relationships are not like this. Only a very small number are like yours. Your husband needs to learn how to be a husband you deserve just like you need to be a wife he deserves. It can't be a one-way relationship.
    Marriage counselor. Or family therapist. If your husband won't try to find a point where he can do more as a husband and is content with just earning money and coming home lazy, then don't be silent about it. His job is to also be a father, and provide an example to his daughter of male figures.
    At the very least, make him sit down with you and have a long conversation about his role in the household and what you and he want from each other. Try to find a point for each other that will maximize your roles and help each other be happy. If you can't do it alone, gather your friends and make an intervention (only as a second to last resort behind marriage counselor or family therapist if you didn't like those options) and make him know that you're unhappy with the current situation.

    too long; didn't read: No it's not normal >.<

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    • I tell him from time to time about himself.. He barely talks to me. I couldnt even talk him into therapy when we lost our firstborn in 2012.

      He'll talk to my mom more than me. But then comes home and gets mad at something she said that he took the wrong way. But all i ever get when i question him is one worded answers..
      Earlier this month, i found out over facebook that my last living grandpa died before i could call.
      Then today i found out my mom's husband died.
      And he never said anything.
      In fact, when i told him abt my stepdad, he changed the subject and complained because i couldnt keep the house clean over the course of a week even tho i "dont do nothing"
      He bitched bcus my daughter (who he got us both sick) had diarrhea earlier and i forgot to empty her bath water after washing her and left her slightly poopy clothes inthe bathroom. I mentioned that this happened DIRECTLY after i found out about my stepdad. -Nothing-. He just told me that it wasnt an excuse and that i was lazy and dirty.

      Im just looking for suggestions mostly cus my mom wud never answer me honestly and directly. She wud just beat around the bush..
      But im seriously just considering leaving him.
      I've given him the benefit of the doubt MANY TIMES.

      He pays all the bills, including groceries if my checks dont cover the whole month. But thats the end of the list.
      Everyone here is praising him for that. But the plan in the first place was for him to do so until i could finish school in june. Then i'd be able to find a better job that can help me build towards one of my career goals (of which he still has none btw). We're not legally married. So technically no hes just a boyfriend. I actually dont believe in marriage. But husband sounds better than boyfriend, no?

      I just dont like being treated like its my JOB to wait on him hand and foot, cook his meals, wash the dishes, do his laundry (he has way more clothes than me), fold it and put it away, as well as take care of my daughter pretty much alone because (in his words) "i work all week, im tired. what do you expect?"

      My mother is in her 60's, she is raising my niece and nephew, as well as taking care of my aunt, her grown adult son, his wife and thier child. She cleans the church for money, she cleans peoples houses, cooks for this lady who is elderly, all for money. And yes she says she tired all day long BUT SHE STILL DOES HER AND THE KIDS' LAUNDRY, COOKS FOR THEM AND CLEANS AFTER THEM & still finds time to keep them happy and spend time with them. but NEVER has she EVER put a crown on her head and made herself QUEEN for us to bow down to. Even when we were stayin under her roof and he was jobless. She wasnt making us do ANYTHING.

      I am just tired of feeling like Cinderella "do this, do that, make me this, bring me that" in my OWN house.

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  • Redcoats

    You need a fresh start.

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    • Darkoil

      I think her husband just needs a kick up the arse. They sound like they could have a good relationship if he put more effort into it.

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      • Redcoats

        That's true, but I don't know if that will fix him. He sounds like he's taken his wife for granted.

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        • He isn't some deadbeat jerkoff leech. Granted he should be more appreciative of what she does, but he still provides.

          Her needs don't trump the child's needs. Being an adult and a parent is understanding that.

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      • We used to have such a good relationship. Thats the only reason im still with him. Cus i want that back. And because my baby needs her father.

        The wrost part is im not sure if he's changed or if these are just his true colors..
        But i feel like im wastin time and energy.

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        • Marriage usually doesn't work, but it does work to make kids. Get over your complaints, or move yourself on.

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  • Optimist

    I'm sorry if I am upsetting you but maybe you should get a divorce, your relationship is clearly not working.:(

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  • amanwithaquestion

    Suck it up. It's fucking marriage.

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  • R19

    I'd suggest you hire a maid, to help around the house(I don't know about you, but where I live labor is cheap.)

    I'd also suggest reaching out to other moms in your community, make some friends and go on outings with them.

    Your husband is not a bad guy in his core, sure he's lazy and doesn't recognize you for all you do(or if he does, he doesn't act on those feelings), he may be Homer Simpson. but he still loves you, I'm sure.

    Do Not get divorced over this, it's bad for the child.
    Being a single mom may be tougher, and who knows when you'll find a better guy.

    I'd like to suggest that your husband start carrying his weight and lecture him on what he ought to do, but I can't, so I'll ask you to send him for counselling.

    Sure his work may be hard and he may be tired everyday, but he needs to know the importance of communication and saying "I Love You" at least once per day

    My Dad was the same way, but luckily I was old enough to lecture him and get everything back on track. I was extremely scared of divorce(hence my extremely adverse reaction to your suggestion of leaving him)

    Or I suggest you have him read "men are from Mars and women are from Venus" (it works strangely enough)

    you should read it too.

    do these 3 things and you'll be fine.

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  • If the man is working to pay for the house and all the bills he deserves credit for that. He also should be more appreciative of the effort you put in with the house and other chores.

    This is what traditional roles are and this is what worked for many, many, MANY years before "equality" came along. The problem with today is equality represents double standards. You should be more of an adult about the whole situation. If you aren't happy you would be told by liberals and feminists that you should be in charge and force him into submission, but you seem to not want to be in charge and are perfectly happy letting him work to provide you with what his working does. What you really should do is work on communication.

    Personally I think you should both grow up and be more concerned with the child's welfare (which is both of your responsibility) and less concerned with your own "needs" being met. This is a classic example of of our "weekend divorce" and "women come first" culture.

    Thank you liberals. This is why our family units don't work anymore and our society is crumbling.

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    • I put my child before anything and everyone, thank you. But i come from a strong lakota tribe that has the utmost respect for women and elders. I was raised to be independent though. The only reason he pays my bills is because we PLANNED on him working a full year so i could finish my school.

      4 months through the year, he is suddenly 98% lazy, only gets up for the remote or cigarette or something to drink, and he DOESNT talk to me unless he wants sex or food or a cleaner house. I constantly try to talk to him. and i get mumbled, incoherent replies like "im fine, nothing, just shut up and leave me alone." While at first i did LITERALLY EVERYTHING house related to my best ability, i had to tone it down becus it meant cleaning literally ALL day EVERYDAY becus between him and my 1 year old, i had |AT LEAST| 2 outfits each. He wud stuff dirty dishes under the couch, behind them, besides them, anywhere. and she'd go knock them over to spill. Shes drag clean clothes outta the dryer onto the wet spots, so more laundry. ALL my clothes togethr is one large load. Not even super. JUST large. Her blankets alone are 2 lg loads, her sheets alone is one load, her clothes all together are 2 large loads, his tops and under tops are one large load, his shorts are one large load, his pants are another load. Then dishes, she eats breakfast lunch and dinner on tiny round plates. 3 a day. Plus mine, usually just one a day cus i usually forget to eat until its time to make dinner, all the pots and pans and baking sheets from dinner, plus the spoons and forks, he never uses the same cup twice. He always lets his dishes dry and harden.

      Everyday he makes his own messes and then blames both his mess and our daughters messes on me.

      You mistook my meaning for equality. I am working to keep my house clean everyday, with a terrible back and a clingy 1 year old.
      I only have 2 hands, and i never get a break. He gets weekends off, i dont. Cus even on weekends he is the same.
      I dont even have time to be selfish. The most selfish thing i can do, is put my baby to bed before 10, sit down and have a beer. Or maybe sleep in late. If i put myself before my daughter, she wudnt even be here, alive and well.
      She'd be stuck in a corner smothered in dirty laundry and pop cans.

      I dont have that "women come first" mentality. I have that, i deserve respect just as much as everybody else, mentality. Cus if you heard his man, respect is not a part of this household. And its kind of hard to willingly be a slave to other ppls every beck and call when you only hear the word PLEASE when it comes before "can we fuck".

      So instead of being a smart ass, how about shut tf up.

      Its easy to say but not as easy to do. ok

      Lord knows if it werent for my daughter, i would just kick this man to the curb so quick.

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      • Step up or shut up. You want things to change than you make it change or get out of your situation.

        You made your bed, now sleep in it.

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  • regisphilbin

    he is probably very tired when he comes home and just wants to relax. you should respect that, but you should also ask him to do some basic things like not leave his clothes and food all over the place, rinse whatever he eats out of so that it's easier for you to clean, and try to act like a father.

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    • Yea no shit, Sherlock. I've been there and tried that many times..

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      • regisphilbin

        why are you being rude i was just trying to help

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        • sorry, im just at my wits end.

          Im so sick of being stuck between "you dont do anything all day" and "youre a stay at home mom, thats hard work, and you're by yourself all day, no neighbors."

          He REFUSES to take me to town on weekends when he's off so i can fill out applications for work or get my permit so i can start getting my license.

          But then complains all the time cus my mom is too busy to take me instead so then im useless. Which makes NO sense.

          I swear im losing my mind..

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  • umph

    Traditional roles. Normal.

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  • Aries

    I will say something in both your defense , he works all day to make the money and pay the bills . He makes sure you guys have food and a house to live in so I feel like if you are not working and contributing to that .. home base should be your specialty or side of the marriage . I think you should take your own advice and step it up and not complain about having meals made , the house clean or picking up after a tired man who just worked all day to keep you under that roof . With that said .. I also think he is at a fault here because he should definitely be investing more love and energy into your child and he should definitely be investing love into you . He can have his down time , he can let his guard down around the house but he needs to be investing into his family because it's a big part of what makes it all work , he needs to be a part of the glue that holds you all together .. you guy's should be making love as often as you can , communicating , appreciating each other and each other's roles ..and most of all investing everything into the child so .. this bullshit where he is too tired or busy for the kid .. the child trumps everything , doesn't matter if he worked or not he should still have time to play and tuck her in and show her he loves her . I would suggest though not comparing him to celeberties , they work hard but they are also rich and you also don't see the whole picture , get your head out of the magazine's . I think you both need to talk and come to a solution together .. it's a team , not one person or the other being responsible .. simply communicate often and express love and always seek to understand before being understood . I hope this helps and hopefully you appreciate where I come from by defending you both .

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    • I agree, as a stay at mom trying to finish school. But theres a fine line between tired and lazy as hell. 3 years ago, he had a job delivering fridges, microwaves, all that stuff, into people's houses. Heavy Appliances mostly. And he worked literally ALL DAY LONG. He'd come home as early as 2, or as late as 12. And wud be out of the house by 530 every morning. But he still came home and loved our firstborn. He still came home and in good spirits, he'd find the time to appreciate me.

      And i can guarantee he worked TWICE as hard then as he does now.
      Not sure what changed aside from our address..
      But i should not have to wash his clothes everyday when he cant do so much as put them up so they dont get dirty or mixed up. I used to put them away but then he decided the dresser wasnt good enough and threw it out with no intention to replacce it any time soon. So now his clothes have nowhere to go. Thus he never has promisingly clean clothes. Thats HIS fault.

      Save ur energy tho. Once i hear "u got the job" his ass is history. I've wasted too much energy. And i've been through way too much in the last 3 years to be made a mockery of in my own house THAT I FULLY PAID FOR ALONE, as he didnt have a job when he first got here. Idc if he pays the bills, he wudnt be payin for shit if it wasnt for me. He was a stitch away from bein on the streets before I BROUGHT my house. This was no accident. It was PLANNED. And he's using it against me "i pay the bills, i get to come home and do nothing but play my playstation 4. Yea im too tired to play with baby but it doesnt take energy to play mkx"

      If he's so special than everyone else can have him come pay their bills then. I'd rather live in the dark than with him.

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  • chained_rage

    Yeaaah I'm not reading that. Summarize it in 22 words and I will give you an excellent reply

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    • modernism

      All you need to know is that the man this woman is with is a shitty husband and a shitty dad. He has the 1950's gender roles basically engrained in his soul. He treats his daughter like she's one of those virtual pets that you maybe check on when you have nothing better to do. And ultimately, he treats his wife like she's simply a maid that happens to be standing between him and the couch.

      In a nutshell, he is lazy, unappreciative, and selfish.

      Not 22 words, but that's the most efficient summary I could give.

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      • THANK YOU! I COULD NoT HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF.

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        • modernism

          Aw, you're so very welcome.

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  • zsdworknman

    I'm going to play devil's advocate here for a minute so unless you have say 12 kids laundry house work and cooking can't fill every day so when you compare it to a full-time job the work isn't comparable really I'll admit he should step it up when it comes to appreciation but sounds like you just want to paint yourself as a martyr

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    • Anonymous200

      I have to disagree. Cleaning a house doesn't usually take all day, but she does have a baby. They make messes and require constant care. So imagine spending an hour cleaning up the living room, only to have a tiny person come along and ruin it in fifteen minutes. As you attempt to clean up the living room again, the tiny person starts screaming. Its diaper is making it uncomfortable.It can't go to the bathroom on its own yet, so you have to change its diaper before the living room can be cleaned up. An hour later, the living room is completely clean. Now the baby needs feeding. That means that after you've fed her, you'll have to clean the high chair, and you still have dishes, laundry and the bathrooms to do. Finally, the baby is done eating and you set her down on the floor. She goes into the living room and wrecks it again.
      Honestly, both roles require the same amount of work. They need to go into counseling, because neither seems to appreciate the difficulty of the others' role. Even worse is that the father is so consumed with work that he's neglecting his daughter. Neglecting his daughter means he isn't fulfilling his role entirely while still expecting his wife to do so and he's harming his child inadvertently.
      AnonymousPollXCreator, if that was too long to read, here's my advice: get counseling before you're forced to divorce.

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      • zsdworknman

        I am well aware of the work involved in having a child my daughter is 2 1/2 and if you are keeping up on cleaning you don't need to deep clean every day they should just need quick clean up . Now I only am speaking from the perspective of being a joint custody parent having a full time job and having my daughter 3 days a week and I get no help from anybody .

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        • I am with my daughter 24/7. And all babies are different. Mine likes to think outside of the box. Literally. She finds anything and everything to spill on my carpet. I can tape her diaper on her and put pants on her and she still mamanges to take it off and not only pee but sometimes if i dont catch her in time, poops. Thats what babies do. Ive had nieces and nephews do the same at her age or worse.. And she's only 14 months. She even pours her dinner on the floor and eats it from there sometimes. So i try to spend as much time cleaning my carpet as possible. And with cconstant spills fom her AND him, its never ending. Quick cleanups are for when she gets saucce or something all over her hands and face. But my baby has ALOT of thick curly hair and she lovves to touch it. So food gets in there alot. So i spend 30 minutes combing it out (yes that much hair) and another 5 - 10 minutes bathing her.

          Like i said, i HAVE to clean EVERYDAY or she cud end up sick from the dirt my husband brings in on his shoes. Or the fiberglass on his clothes. Plus my neice and nephew come over almost everyday and they make a big mess too. & The only things they end up cleaning are my pickle jars or my cookie jars.

          So take your 3 days a week , joint custody havin ass >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> left. Cus you dont know my struggle to talk like ur Mr. KnowItAll. From the day mine was born, I took 100% care of her. i fed her bathed her clothed her, the only thing my husband helped with was holding her for literally 2 minutes while i stuffed my dinner down my throat so he could take 10 minutes to eat without her pickin off his plate. or "in peace" as he says.

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          • zsdworknman

            Sounds like you're doing a pathetic job if you let her do all of that so complain all you want because those spills and messes she makes are your fault for not paying attention to her sorry you suck at being a mom. My daughter never peed or pooped in my house she made messes but they aren't hard to clean up if you do it quickly and yes mine even has long thick curly hair too so stfu already with your pity party and put on ur big girl pants life is ruff sometimes deal with it .

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            • I know for a fact i am a good mother to my child. But as she is learning to do different things each day, i can only do so much. She chews up her food and sometimes will spit it out. She picks at her diapers every chance she gets. She unscrews her sippy cup cap and pours it on herself. She is half black and has the thickest, most shrinkable hair, that combing it dry is impossible. Combing it wet is easier, but not by much. Her hair is so thick, it takes me 15 minutes just to part it in half. Braiding it can take up to 3 days, especially if she's sick. And i've been braiding kids and baby's hair since i was 10, as i have alot of nieces and nephews.

              And i pay her attention all day long. From the minute she wakes up, to the minute i put her in bed at night. Everyday.

              But as youre a male, not a mother, your 50% parenting job is very different.
              Your baby most likely doesnt try to walk in between your legs instead of beside you whenever u go anywhere. Your baby probably doesnt depend on you solely for attention.
              Your baby most likely does not have hair like mine does. You are most likely more involved with your child that my childs father is with her. These are not complaints. They are FACTS.

              REGARDLESS who the FUCK are you to judge me?
              Who tf said i wanted pity???????
              If i wanted pity, i'd go public on facebook, not to some anonymous website no one in my family has ever even heard of.
              Bye with that bullshit.

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