Is my boyfriend's brother's girlfriend acting normal towards him??
I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now. When I first met him, he was living at his brother's house with his brother's girlfriend. I guess his brother and the girlfriend were only dating 1 year prior before I met them. My boyfriend and his brother met her at a few parties before they started dating. The first year of my boyfriend and I dating, life was good. My boyfriend's brother's girlfriend and I got along. We would hang out and even go shopping together. We weren't best friends or anything, just trying to become friends. After awhile my boyfriend and I decided it was time to move in with each other. We ended buying a house in between mine and his work. It's was approximately 45 minutes away from his brother's house.
A month later after we moved. His brother and his brother's girlfriend decided to move too. They ended up buying a house 3 minutes away from ours. That is when everything started to go downhill.
At first it was once in awhile she would call my boyfriend for random things. Then it started her calling him every day to talk. After a few months she started just walking in our house unannounced. Just barging right in without calling or even knocking first. Just to say hi without the brother even with her. This would happen at least 3X a week. I started getting annoyed. Then she started talking to my boyfriend about her love life with his brother. Literally talking about sex to my boyfriend about his brother. My boyfriend's nickname growing up (before I knew him) was gumby, because he is tall. If she needs anything instead of saying his name she'll call him "gums" in a high pitched flirtatious voice. When I was at work once, I received a phone call from my friend saying "who is the girl your boyfriend is with at the mall laughing and talking to?" Turns out he went to the mall with her alone, without my knowing when I was at work. When I confronted him, he stated he was going to tell me on my break. At one poi t I even discovered anytime we would get in any argument, he would call her to vent. It even cane down to a point if the brothers wanted to talk to each other it would go through her. She would call my boyfriend if the brother wanted to ask him anything.
At this point I had enough. 3 months ago I decided to call her and confront her about it. I told her there is a fine line being friends with her boyfriend's brother and being too close friends. I told her the relationship I'm in with him is not a triangle and does not go 3 ways and that she was breaking that fine line.
Since then the barging into my house has stopped. She calls ahead if she needs anything. Now the brothers actually speak to each other instead of going through her. It has gotten a lot better. However; she just recently sent my boyfriend a video message to his personal inbox. It was of a girl monkey and a boy monkey. The girl monkey is poking at the boys monkey's balks with the penis moving back and forth. With the video stating "ready for round two?" Apparently the conversation I had with her 3 months ago didn't apply to this video. I had my boyfriend send her back a response stating...I find this video inappropriate. If you could not send me videos like this I would appreciate it." Her response back was "You have got to be joking!?!?! Gumsssss?????"
I need your advice I don't know what to do. Am I overreacting? Is what she is doing NORMAL???