Is my boyfriend's behavior normal?

49% Normal
17 Comments

Okay. I've been searching on the Internet about relationships and all that stuff, and there's plenty about it. So this may sound typical to you, but I'd be grateful if you said something about it:

I've been dating my current boyfriend for 6 months now. He is two years younger, but we really don't mind. I work from monday to friday, 9 am to 7 pm.

The thing is that he used to text and call me very often during the day. He would tell me he loved me, he missed me, etc.

He texted me good morning... He called me at lunch time. Sometimes, we had just had a date and a few minutes later he would text me something like, "I'm missing you already". I mean... sometimes he would just text, "I love you. I LOVE YOU! Kiss kiss".

I never minded that. My previous boyfriend never did that and I wasn't really used to it, but I was obviously pleased. I started texting him as well and telling him sweet stuff.

When we hadn't talk for a while, he called me just to hear my voice, he said. And I completely adored these things.

But... some weeks ago... everything changed. One day he just didn't call. It was sunday, by the way. I finally called him at 7 pm, and kinda hurt. He didn't seem to be affected at all, like if it was normal he didn't call me for a whole day. I'm not paranoid (or at least I didn't use to be...), but when you're used to something, it's weird when things suddenly change.

I told him I had missed his calls. He sarcastically said that he was sorry for not calling me when I wanted... I accepted it was not his obligation... in fact, it's never been, but he used to do it...

And things haven't been any better. A day can pass by and he just don't contact me. Sometimes he calls me at night, when I'm back from work. And that's all.

Stranger enough, he's nice and cute when we meet on weekends. But those little messages haven't come back. And I miss them. So much

I'm kinda pissed off at him, 'cause I didn't use to miss texts. I started liking them because of him. Now it would really surprise me if he does that again.

I want to tell him, but I don't want to sound needy. I just miss those little things. I felt loved and missed when he did that.

Is it normal that he had stopped? I've read that after a while, a partner can give you for granted and stop chasing you. I want to be chased again, if that's the case. But I don't know what to do...

Voting Results
49% Normal
Based on 289 votes (141 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • JuliusE
    12 years ago

    Well I did the same thing with my wife after a while. I wasn't bored with her or anything but infatuation doesn't last forever. Long term relationships are different and most couples these days don't make the transition. You didn't mention how old you both are, that is relevant.

    I will admit most men are not a mature or as willing to take on commitment (come hell or high water) as I am. So you definitely have a legitimate reason to be worried BUT this could just be making that transition and not be anything bad at all.

    After a while I have learned (from her telling me how she felt) to make a conscious effort to write her sweet texts while she's at work or away. It's still not anything like it used to be during the infatuation stage but it's a compromise. I let her know I still love and care and she realizes it's normal growth that we don't text like new lovers.

    On another note, you should do some self evaluation. Did you really start liking him BECAUSE OF these texts? Do you require constant attention for your relationship to work? If another guy came along who would or does show you the attention you desire, would you be seriously tempted to end it with your current bf for him?

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  • Diver2
    9 years ago

    Were you sucking him off. Maybe someone is blowing him now and he likes him or her better than you. Smartin up.

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  • Para-Normal
    9 years ago

    In general, people don't up and change unless they have a reason. There are many possibilities as to what the reason is. Wish I could help you there.

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  • 1nfestor
    11 years ago

    If bout_korea MEN!

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  • BoredGuy
    13 years ago

    proply he thought he always had to make the first "move" and got tired of it. I suggest arrange a sexful weekend with him and discuss all about it, and tell him how you loved all this little things he did. showing that you had appreciated his action may do the trick. it's like telling him "you have a huge cock baby" or w/e.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Well maybe he thinks he found out something about u that isn't true, maybe som1s making rumers that he's cheating on u and he's mad bcos he thinks it's true but he doesn't have the strength to talk to u about it. I say u should meet up sumwere and talk about it. Everything will b fine. Don't wory.

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  • phoenix*
    13 years ago

    i think that you should consider communicating. thats stuff that you talk about in adult relationships.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    well it sounds like hes bored with you. im a guy ive had only three gf s but i dident get bored they dumped me for more handsome guys i guess we can be pains but talk to him i think he may be cheating (i havent cheated i swear)
    maybe he is to busy lots of shit could be goin down but if you talk hell understand...atleast i would

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  • Christoph
    13 years ago

    guys can change unexpectadly, well its hard to find the right guy i think. because alot are douchebags. you could try texting him more, then in return he might send you some /\ - /\

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  • secrettellings
    13 years ago

    maybe hes getting tired of you. im not trying to sound mean but spice it up a little;)

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Only dinks like you think that way. Don't want ur girl to think something is up then don't be sweet and do certain things for a ling period of time and then stop. Men are simple and easy to read when it comes to them stopping their habits. It's a big red warning sign.

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    • TheGuruOfTheSauce
      13 years ago

      You're obviously paranoid to think any small change is a red flag. You're opinion is influenced by the slew of shitty boyfriends you've had but you were probably a shitty girlfriend anyways to think so low of others.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Maybe his infatuation for you decreased? That's maybe why he doesn't do all those things he used to do.

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    • carolinatrue
      12 years ago

      Im going through the same thing,seeing him and engaged for 2 yrs,sometimes he can be the sweetest guy going next i dont hear for hours,when at one point he wouldnt let me do anything,meaning going,out wanted to no who i was with where i was going,texted me all day everyday,untill i found out i wasnt the only one he was chatting to and meeting,the texts he was sending me he forwarded them to all he was texting,poems,love,low days depression,i had it all then he got arguementive with me like he wanted out but hadnt got the bottle to tell me.im still going through it,he tells me one day im too good for him,and that he dont deserve me next day he wants to grow old with me,dont trust him anymore,im just in it cause i have no one else at this moment in time..im trying to stay strong but inside its killing me,

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  • soccer2
    13 years ago

    Maybe try doing the things e used to do. Call him, text him, be adoring and flirty. Hopefully he returns the favor. If tht doesn't work then have a heart to heart chat with him face to face so he can see the emotion. Let him know how you loved those simple little calls and texts and that it let u know he cared. Twll him it makes you feel less wanted when he abruptly stopped it seemed like he lost interest. Tell him it hurts. But try not t make him mad. Try to gethim to see it ur way so he can understand without getting upset. If those don't work then maybe ur time together is over. But I hope not :)

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    Some men are like this unfortunately. I dunno if anything is going on but maybe he's bored. I dunno a lot of men don't get the fact that us women hate it when they stop doing things like sweet texts or calls. My gut says he is bored or cheating, but that's from years of dating douchebags.

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    • TheGuruOfTheSauce
      13 years ago

      lol cheating? Unless he's a poet of some kind I don't think pouring his heart out every hour of the day means he loves you any less. Texts aren't the best way to communicate love anyways they're like Indian smoke signals on a personal level. I think you need to step back away from the phone if this simple stuff is making you this paranoid. If anything he realized he got to that step where he doesn't have to be all lovey dovey to work his fangs into you. My gut says he is bored with you and probably cheating, but that's from years of dating whores

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