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Why users make stories of other users?
It's bullying. It also keeps users who need help and advice from asking questions. It hurts me that even in this site people can't respect one another.
I agree, I never approve those posts when I see them. Like do we really have to go back to kindergarten here people? If you don't have anything nice to say...
If you honestly have that much of a problem with a person, tell them in a private message. Don't try to publically defame someone, that's just fucked, and probably a reflection of your own sad existance.
I didn't even know those existed :P At least that means they never get through moderation :)
Same here.
I've been on this site for a while, and I've only really seen maybe one or two posts about Allistalla, but that's really the only posts I've seen about other users. Maybe they just don't get through moderation?
It must be that they never get through. I was given IIN Gold for a month in May though, and I never saw these sort of stories in the Unmoderated Section then. It must be a relatively new trend and hopefully it'll fade away with time :)
If none of them get through it also proves that moderation isn't a completely random process like a few people suspected it was :)
is it the rape stories we are talking about? oh i just noticed that dogs nose is in the shape of a heart, appropriate and cute
It is human nature. Despite all efforts to the contrary IIN can be a bit of a social club. Part of being like this is that people want to be liked, and they want to be accepted. They will make fun of others because people find it funny, and they will "like the poster" more because of his assumed superiority to the person he is making a post about.
Can't we all just get along? hehe
I think those users who were talked about above are too emotionally invested to IIN so it has too much of an effect on them that its taken as bullying even tho they might be doing the same without realizing so I think it's more that they feel threatened by stronger users here so they must retaliate
God only knows. But I'd love there to be a bug with IIN and every single story author made known for 24 hours. And all aliases linked together by IP address. No hiding for anyone.
It's a shame we can't have anonymity but have some peer review at the same time. Maybe we need to nominate a small group of people who do get to see this information and "name and shame" where relevant. Bullies have immunity here.
I think the moderation of stories on IIN is WAY BETTER than before. Stories weren't moderated and we had an influx of trolls posting "hate lists" to provoke users.
Believe me, this is minor compare to the issues we had on IIN before.
So you're saying one of the features of IIN Gold is "Old School" and another is "Troll Drama"? I wasn't here before, but that right there is similar to what goes on in the unmoderated section.
Stories weren't moderated at all, you could post it and it will be immediately be posted on the forum.
The Upcoming Posts are like that now, as soon as a story is submitted, we can read and rate it.
That's why some of the users know what's going on and others don't, because they never make it past moderation. Horrible stories have been posted naming names or just insinuating which users they may be referring to.
Sometimes they are rejected and sometimes the OP deletes them even before that and posts another. I assume it's the work of one person - I honestly believe it is.
There can't possibly be more than one user this obsessed with popularity or lack of thereof, with so much hate, jealousy and spite in their heart and time on their hands.
Especially because there is a time of the day when the activity stops, for they obviously have to sleep.
Still, this is all just in the theoretical realm. I have no idea of what actually is going on.
Because there's no known cure for stupidity and butthurt... yet.
Honestly, I think these stories are posted by users who have become way too emotionally vested in this site and need to find other ways of making themselves feel good because obviously their quest for online acceptance isn't really leading them anywhere =\
I feel the same way. I can't imagine that they have any other goal than to make the user it's targeted at feel bad and unwelcome, which is beyond disappointing. It actually makes me feel angry and upset. People should be able to come here without that sort of crap being thrown at them.
As long as everyone here knows that they're appreciated and that they are always welcome, that's all that matters. Hopefully the small group of bullies, which are thankfully a minority group here, aren't hurting the victim's feelings. Although, I can't imagine that I'd be anything less than upset if one was made about me:/
Also, awww at picture:P!
I assume they are made by angry teenagers.
Really though, don't let it bother you so much, it's kids play.
Everything that is negative about this website is eerily similar to the crap that goes down in high school, so I assume that it is the teenage users bringing their bent methods of socializing to IIN. Think about it. All those users talking about who "belongs" to whom, the rape stories, the clubs, the I hate so-and-so stories... It makes me feel as though I'm re-living my high school days.
I doubt it's teenagers, I'm sorry. The teenage regulars are incredibly mature and the other teenagers that do show up, don't stick around long enough to take interest in this micro-society.
There were never any bullying problems in my high school that I could speak of. The difference it's that in high school you are very aware they are just teenagers. In here, it could be anyone taking advantage of the anonymity to cause harm. Trolling can easily turn into bullying.
You are very lucky then. Most of the people I know have seen bullying problems in their high school. I've seen it. I think a bully-free environment would be ideal for learning. Then you could focus more energy on what is important, instead of on protecting yourself from negative attention. That would be a much better situation.
I was relieved once I entered the working world and bullying wasn't all that common. If it does go on, it's socially subversive or usually just plain old gossipy. Actually, it can be quite easy to ignore, unless they are trying to sabotage your job. However, I think the fear of losing one's job, because companies have policies to protect people from bullying and will fire you if you do it, encourages people to behave like grown ups even if they don't particularly want to sometimes. Plus, it's a job. You're there to earn a wage so that you can pay your bills, not to make everyone your loyal BFF or find a date for the weekend. So, that takes the pressure off having to be social at all when you're at work.
I agree with you that anyone out there could be taking advantage of the anonymity to be a dick. I do still believe most of it is probably teenagers. I saw a poll a few days back that asked the age of IIN users. There sure are a lot of kids here. Since I believe that most adults have been conditioned to act more rationally because of their years in the workforce, I think the large majority of nasty stories are made by IIN members who are teenagers. Anyway, that's my theory.
I disagree that teenagers are the problem. In fact, quite the opposite. Bullies are bullies regardless of their age. And they get more sophisticated. People also tend to deal with them better with age. I've had (what I assume) were 15 year olds attempting to bully me here. I completely disarmed them in very little time and then had a joke about it with them, because I have the tools to do that. If it were the other way around and I was attacking a 15 year old with all the experience I've gathered, I think that's entirely different.
I couldn't count the number of attempted 'attacks' I've had here from hatemail to some very nasty, bitter or manipulative people, but I will tell you that the three that stick in my mind all originated from people over 20. Worse, I think they all thought they were doing the "right" thing. From protecting their relationships (which were under no threat anyway) to destroying someone who has too much influence for the wellbeing of IIN. In each case there was a personal motive they chose to ignore. I am much too nice to ever publicly reveal their identity, to say what they did, or to make sure they don't do it to someone else, but hey, maybe one day I'll get drunk enough and a few things will slip out. Watch this space, folks.
Not that I actually need to say, to be honest. There are people vastly more intuitive than me on IIN. If I see what's really going on (and I am fairly dense sometimes), they must do too. In short, yes, some teenagers pull stuff but I think a bigger problem with this site is people older than teenagers bullying people because they're an easy mark. It's something I feel extremely strongly about.
Because they're lame and can't fend for themselves, even on the internet.
Well this is something Udi should be looking into it. I call for the nomination of user based moderators for the site *Looks at Dappled*. Udi did say years back he would consider getting moderators on here after the troll war of 07/08.
I totally agree with you OP personal attacks are not needed on IIN.
No way! I wouldn't want the power and I also wouldn't want to be separated from the IIN crowd by having a different role here. I wouldn't feel part of it any more. I'd do it for Yahoo!Answers, though, if they nominate one of their lot to do it here.
I'm not saying that I don't trust that you'd be a great mod, but I think the concept of users being picked for mod roles would only deepen the problems that we are having with the popularity issues and make the users more distrustful of the mods because it presents the possibility of being able to gain favor (or lack of favor) from mods.
That's another issue that crossed my mind. In fact, I built on that thesis. If I was approached about an issue between someone I know well and someone I barely know, I'd have to be impartial even if it meant falling out with someone I like. I've been in that position in other places and while I can do it, I don't want to do it here. This is purely a selfish attitude but I don't apologise for it.
Also, I'm too "known" here to be a good mod. My opinions are all over the place. People know how to influence me or get under my defences. Like I said, mods shouldn't be site users. But I would happily mod another site in return for them modding us.
I believe that it would be entirely possible on a website where the rules are cut and dried but the rules of this website leave (much needed) wiggle room and I do tend to believe that the boundaries between offensive, right and wrong are not entirely clear in the realms of freedom of thought.
The sad part, I guess, is that many users choose to and often make it a point to abuse that wiggle room. I doubt that we're all innocent of it.
Hmm, I don't know. I think that's where you need clever mods. Because the rules are flexible, the mods can work within that framework to resolve things. A good mod can actually be hampered by stringency. Stringency helps bad mods that need back-up, though.
And yeah, my own behaviour hasn't always been exemplary. I once came down on someone so hard that I think they left the site.
I haven't noticed, but then again I don't look to closely. Have any examples?
I agree, publicly humiliating someone could be considered bullying. Someone did it to me once on Tumblr..oh well. I made a post about her here, and one user commented and basically defended her. I won't say any names but I kinda liked that user until then, now I hope she tries to talk to the mean bitch so she sees what she's really like. I don't hate her, I just hate that she defended the mean person. Of course if she misunderstood, which may be the case, I forgive her.
Anyway, this is an advice site, so we should all just be nice.