Is it normal to wonder why its rude to call a woman fat

Because it is usually meant as an insult.

The words "stupid" or "whore" can be meant as endearing, too. With "fat", it's a bit more difficult.

Examples? Here you go:
"Don't say that, stupid. Of course I'll buy you a new car."
"Now come here, you little whore. I'm gonna fuck you brainless."

I can't come up with an example for "fat", where it's not an insult.

Everyone else has already said it, but it's probably because it's insulting. And I'm sure if the person is fat and they're aware of this, they wouldn't want people pointing it out all the time for no good reason. It would hurt my feelings if people constantly pointed out things I'm sensitive about. I mean, I don't care if someone calls me fat, because I know I'm not. I'd care if someone called me something I dislike about myself and was sensitive about. Maybe this only applies to some people, though.

If you think it's a good idea to help someone with their weight for health reasons, then it can be done with much more tact, rather than just calling them fat and telling them to sort it out or something like that.

I think it really goes back to the basic sexual politics of the animal kingdom. We are animals after all, the male tries to impress in order to mate with the female, while the female does her best to be desirable to the male. I think there is a deep insecurity within females when it comes to body image and you are tapping into that.

I see what you're getting at, but "fat" is a loaded word in a way that "short" or "tall" or "blonde" or "female" isn't. Maybe it shouldn't be a negatively charged word, but it is. Fat, to many people, (wrongly) implies a lack of willpower or control. It's seen as less attractive than thinness, and because too many people still assign value to women based on how ornamental they are, it's supposed to be some kind of cutting insult to tell her she isn't decorative in the way society expects her to be.

I agree with you that "fat" should be no more of an insult than "tall," but the emotional baggage that word carries is huge. When some women would literally rather die than become fat, it's easy to see how mentioning someone's fat could be an insult. Weight will be a problematic subject as long as a woman's appearance is tied to others' assumptions about her.

More power to you for fighting that and refusing to be stigmatized by a word. I find euphemisms like "fluffy" and "big-boned" appalling, too. I've been fat and thin and am currently somewhere in between, but I never clung to cutesy terms.

Because it's rude. Calling anyone, fat, male or female comes off mean spirited and isn't necessary. Insults are just unnecessary. Always try to remember the golden rule.

I think it offends most women because it's generally a very touchy subject that women are really insecure about. I've been around thin females who were skinny and thought they were fat or who were hot and thought they were ugly. I don't know if they were fishing for compliments but I have heard that some of those "hot" girls are often really insecure because they feel they have to look perfect to be pretty and any little fault seems to crush their confidence.

I get offended when people call me skinny because that's not what I want to be. Lately people are slapping this label on me and I became stuck in it for a while. Every time I gain a little weight someone tells me I'm wasting away, tells me I have no butt or asks me if I've been eating and I'm like... FUCK. These aren't descriptions anymore, they are labels and I fuckin hate labels. I never feel the need to call anyone skinny or fat and I honestly don't understand why everyone else does.

If you think they might get offended by being called fat, ask them when the baby is due.
That'll teach them...

It is rude to call anyone fat. It is like saying someone is ugly.

I once asked this short,obese,glasses wearing girl for her weight at work in front of 3 co-workers and our manager. She got pissed

It may be the truth!Perhaps it is offensive,not sure

What I find weird is that with men there isnt really a key word that makes them angry.

People seem to assume you are calling someone "fat" as an insult. I always wished I could call my BF "fat" as a term of endearment, but I knew he would think it was rude.

well, i have weight issues and am currently trying to lose weight and am not offend at being called "fat" but i can understand why other woman are offended, being it's usually intended as an insult.

Seriously though don't call a girl fat coz they will never forget it

Nah, I'm quite tall and awkward so people can dig at that, doesn't bother me, but it's still an insult to appearance.

It is an generally used as an insult, but I like your strength and that you're comfortable in your skin so it doesn't affect you.

There seem to be no acceptable terms...
Curvy seems to be the latest one. Some are offended at plus-sized. Should we say "woman who is not thin or average weight"? Husky or portly?

See... Fuck this world, people can never leave eachother alone.

The utter deep respect i have.. The patience i BARE with most people i ever get to freaking meet... Yet they puke, they puke shit out of the mouth..