Is it normal to want an equal relationship?

Is it normal to want a completely equal partnership? I want a man that isn't 'The man' but not a little bitch either. I see SO many women that love being dominated by men in and out of the bedroom and to me, personally i'm disgusted by it. Yes, I get being rough in the bedroom in fact that can be a turn on, but let me put it this way. If he slams me up against the wall or try's pinning me down during sex, i'm throwing him off and doing the same to him. ( and yes, it's very possible for a women to be strong and do that considering I'm 5'9 and can lift around 180-200 pounds off the ground, yeah. ) and in everyday activity's it disgusts me even more. My family have been either dick haters or vag haters, so to speak. The men in my family have been known to cheat, beat and tell the women what to do & when to do it. My dad actually taught me how to shoot a gun for protection and even just for fun and my uncle and grandfather threw a fit claiming how a little C U Next Tuesday/ woman doesn't deserve to learn how to shoot a gun! My mom growing up with that said brother and father has hated men, yet not them (shes in denial, really) anyway, she put's down men every chance she gets and to me that's completely wrong! Then I see other men in my family, also, that follow there wife's around like puppy dogs. The 'yes dear, whatever you say dear' type of guys. I view them as just as weak as women that do that shit. A partnership should be equal! I don't want a man taking care of me yet I don't want to take care of him either! What's so damned hard with finding a relationship like that?! I don't want a guy telling me what to do but I also want to hear his opinion! i'm not an arguemenative type of person, in fact I hardly ever get mad so there really wouldn't be that many arguments, but all I ever find are guys that want to dictate you and try to cover up some type of shorteg 'down there' or some little man in a big mans body complex. OR a guy that is weak and never speaks his mind and will do whatever you, or his friends tell him to do. To me I completely view women and men equal in every way, shape and form no matter what anyone else thinks. This battle of the sexes shit is stupid, pathetic and 5 yr. old shit! Are there any others out there like me? Who wants a man or women that is there own person yet doesn't try to dominate you? If so how normal is it?