Is it normal to think that abusive people change?

ive been with my ex boyfriend for 2 years..he is also the father of my 2 year old daughter. during that 2 years hes been physically and verbally abusive. I went back with him countless times and im completely jaded. I have a restraining order on him and hes on 100,000 bail from hitting me. he always tells me hes changed and begs to get back with me and so I do...for some reason I think theres hope for him to be a better person. is this normal?

Voting Results
31% Normal
Based on 75 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Nakkiel

    It is normal to THINK he will change, it isn't normal for the abuser to actually change.

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  • randomjelly

    Side note: As an ex officer let me warn you...If you allow him to break the restraining order then you are also in violation of the law and will be arrested. If you are foolish enough to allow him back then first have the order dismissed.

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  • dummyme74

    They don't change. And there is no hope he will change. But anyways there is a 75% chance the next mann you meet will be the same way or worst, so please stay alert and learn to read the clues of abusers.

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  • silentscreams17

    It's normal for people to want to change for the better. Sadly it rarely happens. I don't think you should get back togheather with him because what if you weren't there and he got mad? He could hit your kid

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  • SwimBikeRun

    He won't change! You and your daughter deserve better and deep down you know it!!

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  • Avant-Garde

    Don't trust him. All abusers use this tattic. They promise change and that they'll never hurt you again. Very rarely do they change.

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  • Wierdmyself

    Its normal to have hope for the father of ur child and someone u love. Just remember it's hard for abusive people to change... if they hit once they'll hit again. Its just something they've learned to get what they want.

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