Is it normal to think men don't like skinny women

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30 Comments

Hi there,

I have been feeling insecure, and I want to be happy with my body.

A lot of people say there is pressure to be model thin and skinny. However I feel quite the opposite. I feel there is more pressure to have curves, and have a body like beyonce or kim kardashian. I have been thin my whole life. measurements 32-24-33, 5'6, AA boobs, 21 years old.. A lot of people look at pictures of skinny girls to get inspired to lose weight.. however I look at these pictures to feel like there is other people out there with a similar body type to me. Most girls I know try and make there butt and boobs look bigger.. they stick out there bums, and wear push up bras.. However I am very petite and don't like feeling fake so I don't even wear a bra and just wear clothing that flatters my body type. It seems like every other day someone asks " are you a ballerina??" Ballerinas usually aren't curvy.. So I know it's cause my body type.

I feel insecure because it seems like EVERY guy I talk to likes curvy women.. I search online as well and ask if men prefer skinny or curvy and it seems everyone likes curvy. I'm trying to stop obsessing over it and be happy that I have a slim figure and don't have severe weight problems. But every time I look in the mirror and see my petite shape, I can't help but wonder what it would be like to have a curvy figure and be able to show cleavage and stuff.. I also like hiking a lot and yoga, so my body has some muscle definition. It seems like guys don't like girls with muscles either? I don't have a 6 pack or anything.. but I am showing some definition. I will be around guys and they will be checking out a girl and be like "she's too skinny" and the girl will be bigger than me.. people think my face is pretty, and I will get "your pretty or your beautiful" from guys but I never get told i'm hot or sexy and no guys seem to be going crazy over my body? I guess I sort of feel like i'm not a woman or something since I don't have big boobs and nice wide hips. Also in music videos all the girls are curvy and shaking there bums and doing all this sexy stuff.. I try to stay away from anything mainstream and in the media because I start getting self conscious . I have also heard guys say thin women look like a 12 year old boy.. the more I look at my body the more I feel like a 12 year old boys body.

Sorry this is so long, and I know there are more important things to think about in life, and this is sort of a vain subject. I just really want to know if any guys would think a thin body is sexy, and even if a guy would perhaps think small boobs and small hips/butt are alright?

thanks for any replies.

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68% Normal
Based on 133 votes (90 yes)
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Comments ( 30 )
  • Unimportant
    11 years ago

    Just minutes ago a guy showed me the picture of a girl and said that she was a little bit too overweight for his taste.

    At first I couldn't believe he was serious. She was thin, not bony in an unhealthy way, but really just thin.

    So, what I'm trying to say is, even the categories of "obese", "normal", "thin", "skinny" et al. differ from person to person, sometimes they differ very rigorously.

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  • disthing
    11 years ago

    Oh I don't know.

    I think, in general, most men aren't so specific, so narrow and so superficial that they only have a single preference. Personally, I've been attracted to all kinds of girls all kinds of shapes and sizes. I might have a leaning towards one or the other, but ultimately my situation and my emotion tends to dictate who I'm attracted to.

    Curvy, not-so-curvy, that doesn't really matter. Muscle definition can be a little off-putting to some guys, I think because there is a traditional association of defined muscles denoting masculinity. But to others it's hot for a women to be athletic, fit and healthy. Lots of guys aren't bothered about small boobs (despite what girls assume), lots of guys aren't bothered about broad 'child-bearing' hips, lots of guys aren't bothered about the size of a girl's butt.

    "but I never get told i'm hot or sexy and no guys seem to be going crazy over my body?" You expect just ordinary guys to be going crazy over your body? Perhaps your expectations are set a little high. I don't expect random girls to be going crazy over my body or telling me I'm hot and sexy in casual conversation. It doesn't mean I think my body is ugly or unattractive because of it.

    I hope you overcome your insecurities because they aren't warranted.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    No, no.. don't worry. Men DO like skinny women. I'm a guy and I'd rather date a very skinny girl than this "curvy" bullshit. it's just a trend these days.. it'll pass.

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    • [Old Memory]
      11 years ago

      Btw, none of my friends would touch kim kardashian or beyonce with a 10 foot stick. They're not proportional, overweight and very gross.

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  • Dad
    11 years ago

    I find skinny girls sexy.
    I've never actually understood why guys like the big bust (and bum) look.
    Big boobs just sag, and are very heavy for girls. I actually feel sorry for them.
    And a big butt? Yuk. Those 'shake your booty' clips never excite me. Mmm Mmm, a flabby fat bum, yuk!
    Anyway, you need to know that the 'curvy' look is not for everyone.
    And you don't even 'have' to tone your body. Skinny is sexy on its own. Although I agree the 'bony' models (extreme cases) DO look under nourished TOO much.
    I'm positive that many guys would want you from what you have described. At least in my mind.

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    • GuessWho
      11 years ago

      ^ I'll have to agree with everything you said.

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  • emilydoll
    11 years ago

    I'm "skinny" and gave an elegant body, be happy with that!

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I heard a man say once that having sex with a skinny chick is like fucking a rock because she has no softness.

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  • nightmare28
    11 years ago

    Different men like different women, some love walking skeletons, some like athletic girls, some like em curvy and some prefer behemoths, its all a matter of personal taste.

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  • GuessWho
    11 years ago

    I like skinny girls. That's actually my preference.

    ------
    Also: 'curvy'/'sexy'/'big boobs' girls are more likely to just be the target of a one-night-stand.
    You've got a better chance of finding someone who really cares about you the way you are.

    ------
    You'll probably also notice me posting 'BOOBIES!' all over the site, but that's just for fun.
    I really don't care about size, but I don't like very big ones.
    Anything less than D is acceptable.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Skinny girls that are "Healthy" skinny are still seen as a good thing, although I think women look better with curvs.
    I don't get where women think men are preasuring them to be skinny. That's not what men do. Maybe they try to encourage them to not be fat, but they don't preasure them to be skinny, despite what a lot of women like to think.

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    • VioletTrees
      11 years ago

      It's not so much that men are specifically pressuring women to be skinny (there are individual men who do this, but it's not typical, I don't think). It's that in our society, women are pressured to be skinny. Regardless of where exactly that pressure is coming from, it's important to address it. It's a feminist issue in that it disproportionately affects women. Men can have body image issues, too, but women bear the brunt of this stuff right now.

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        Well, when men don't have to have the preasure of running in to defend women when they see them in danger, then I'll see their appearance issue as important.

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        • VioletTrees
          11 years ago

          Are you seriously saying that we can't address feminist issues until all men's gender issues have been solved?

          With an attitude like that, nothing will ever get fixed. Stop playing oppression olympics. This is not a contest, and it's not like we can't deal with both of those issues at the same time. Being concerned about how gender issues hurt men doesn't mean that you can't care about how they hurt women.

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          • [Old Memory]
            11 years ago

            Well aren't feminists and women that don't class themselves do the exact same thing, just not bluntly admitting it?
            No, I am saying that when we work towards helping both gender's problems out equally.
            I am stating that until the male gender receives as much help as the female gender does, and have their problems noticed just as much, then I will put my attention towards women's problems, not before.

            The female gender have far more people worrying for their rights and "equality" than men do, so forgive me if I'm trying to support and make people notice that there are a lot of inequalities that in some cases, are worse than women inequalities.

            As soon as male problems are addressed just as much as female problems, then I'll take notice to females, not before. Why would I give attention to the group that has inequalities that most are trying to fix instead of give attention to the inequalities to the group that has less people watching their backs? Won't happen.

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    • NeuroNeptunian
      11 years ago

      Probably from the millions of instances in which I've seen men specifically say, "No fat chicks" either verbally, with T-shirts, Facebook pages as well as implicit pressure that females feel when males feel the need to look at the rail-figured women in porn, oggle at women with as much body fat as my small finger has etc, their rap songs, their country songs, goodness there are far to many exampled to list...

      You can argue that explicitly stating disgust for "fat chicks", which, whether or not you wish to accept it, includes women that have visible amounts of body fat (there really is no true definition of what it means to be fat, there is overweight and obese, but people typically don't narrow it down so nicely), even though it reduces said women to two simple and somewhat offensive words (she's not a woman, she is a "fat chick") does not count as "pressuring women to be skinny", and I would accept that argument with credence to YOUR personal definition of the word skinny, but take it from a males perspective...

      If a large number of women expressed their desire for a certain type of male (eg. masculine and muscular) and you're not exactly up to par with the men in the magazines that they oggle and the pornos that they watch with those men in them, and they blatantly and explicitly expressed that they would have no alternative (no skinny wimps!), and it appears as if your pool of potential mates is limited to how well you can live up to the explicit "no skinny wimps!" declaration, would you not agree that a large number of men would rightly so, feel pressured to live up to an expectation that, in reality, may be unattainable for some men?

      The pressure isn't coming from men 100%, but much of it does come from men. It doesn't help that even women feel the need to criticize each other. I know that women do these things for the purposes of attracting men, not just to please other women, and they will do what men seem to respond to most as "attractive". These women are ultimately out to be attractive to men, and market responds to demand...

      I'm not implying that it's exclusively the fault of men but once again, I must add, the market responds to demand!

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        I dissagree with most of what you typed, but I'm really not motivated enough to reply in full, which would be needed for you to see my point.

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        • NeuroNeptunian
          11 years ago

          Fair enough.

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  • CDmale4fem
    6 years ago

    I realize this post is 5 years old, but if by chance the O. P. is still on here I was wondering if things got any better about the "skinny girl" thing. IMHO its a matter of finding that someone that just loves you ad you are. But I also had a suggestion or a compromise. If you were able to be happy with yourself and take satisfaction in knowing there are probably hundreds of thousands of guys in the world that arr crossdressers and they will wear the bras for you. I think you sound just ri-t the way you are. Sexy and hot and beautiful.

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  • powderedtoastman
    11 years ago

    I think skinny women are hands down the sexiest. Don't worry there is enough preference to span the body types of the globe. Remember, despite what popular media may make us think, every person is a human being and we see them as whole; not a compilation of body parts. Big boobs may work for some girls but I'm guessing if you had them you'd look like you're gonna tip over. Work with and accentuate what you do have, don't try to make up for the traits that aren't prevalent in you. It's highlighting that is sexy, not masking. show off that flat stomach and the big chested or butt girl will show that off while she wishes she had what you did. Grass is always greener on the other side haha. You may also be happy to know that I stumbled across here searching for skinny women pornography, which is my particular fetish haha. so plenty of guys are into skinny girls and yes all guys watch pornography. (at least the healthy ones)

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  • meltdown
    11 years ago

    yes it is and i like grils that r skanny rill skanny and i am a man so lot all of tham like that

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  • EfulgentAnomaly
    11 years ago

    I am wondering if you typically ask this question to guys you are dating. If you are dating him, do not concern yourself with what he prefers as far as physical traits. Do not inquire. If he is with you then you make up his preferences and you do not need to worry about what he prefers in a woman such as size/ breast / weight/ hair color/ eye shape...anything! Accept that your guy loves a small petite frame and that you attracted him. If he makes it known while dating you that you need to be curvy then that is his issue. Try not to internalize it and make room for the one who embraces all of you. Curvy can be nice, but I know plenty who have to take many precautions to prevent the curvy from becoming fat. Recondition your thoughts. Own and assert your petite frame!

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  • blaster
    11 years ago

    I lovem skinny , even tom boyish and flat , gotta be my dream figure.

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  • ygrowup
    11 years ago

    Your very special in today's world it seems! And I go for petite over anything else! But that only gets you started in the relationship, it is your personality that keeps me looking forward to the next day with you! Everyone should be so blessed as you!

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  • tsukuyomi
    11 years ago

    I'm on the other spectrum - I have a really big butt, wide hips and C cup size. I have 13 inches difference between my hips and waist which makes trying to find jeans that fit nearly impossible.

    I have always wanted to be petite and thin. I think delicate "ballerina" body types are beautiful and graceful.

    I also always felt like guys only liked thin girls. When I first started developing my mom used to comment on how curvy I was - I'd be hurt because I thought it was an insult. I always feel fat, even though I'm not technically overweight. My tummy isn't perfectly flat. I have cellulite on my thighs and my butt jiggles when I walk. My sisters always make fun of me for having a big butt too. It used to bother me a lot.

    I hate that I can't wear shorts without bringing more attention to my butt. Or a somewhat low cut top without my boobs spilling out. Thin girls can wear those clothes and not look "slutty" (hate that word and what it denotes but I can't think of a better word).

    I'm not a guy, so maybe I can't give you the best input here, but I definitely think guys are attracted to your body type. One guy I know loves thin, petite women. He prefers small breasts over big ones. I'm positive there are LOTS of guys like that and I'm sure whoever you decide to be involved with will go crazy over your body.

    But I hope you'll only settle for someone who wants you for who you are - not the size of your breasts or butt.

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  • GoraIntoDesiGals
    11 years ago

    Can I tell you a secret? All men like skinny girls and all men like young girls but it's become so politically incorrect to admit it that they all claim they like old chubby women.

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    There are downsides to every body type, and most men I know would appreciate most body types. Being attractive and having a certain body type don't necessarily go hand in hand and most men that I know are not EXTREMELY picky.

    Just as well, I am somewhat "curvy", 36-28-37, and no matter how much weight I lose, and I have tried this before, I could never actually look slender.

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  • KeddersPrincess
    11 years ago

    Some men do and some men don't. Everyone likes something different.

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  • Ramit10
    11 years ago

    Its hard to say without seein your pic but you sound like a average skinny girl. Like not anorexic looking but just a reg girl. I always date skinny girls idk maybe its just a fetish or cause im kinda on the skinny side but I love looking at their bodies(not the ones where you can see ribs)

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  • dappled
    11 years ago

    I often talk about how women carrying a bit of extra weight are attractive. And they are to me. But it's not exclusive. My longest relationship was with someone who was constantly underweight and not too far off your body shape (although five inches shorter). One factor in it becoming a long-term relationship was how sexy I found her (her body in particular). So, yes, your body type certainly can be considered sexy.

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