Is it normal to suddenly wake up full of anger?

I recently graduated from college, and this summer has been emotionally rough for me. Recently, I’ve been waking up angry and I can feel it in my eyes. I keep my emotions to myself and only express myself homes to my boyfriend, because he’s very understanding and helps me the best he can. I know it’s not ok to bottle up emotions, but whenever I tell my mom about my emotions, she tells me to “Talk to the lord” and says I need to go to church. My dad only says that I take things too seriously. My sister tells me to let it go, because I’m in a better place now than when I was in high school. But I’ve been remembering all the times that I was picked on, often by my family members, taken advantage of by a former boyfriend and classmates, and feelings of jealousy towards people with friends or female fictional characters. I try not to disclose too much about my feelings to my family because they tend to give me advice only to pick on me on days like my birthday, or remind me of how I was taken advantage of by my ex. It’s taken a toll on my relationship with my current boyfriend, because I only feel confident telling him about my problems. I realize the anger is the sum of a lot of things that happened to me but I’ve ignored it for the sake of my health or my studies or to appear like I’ve move past it.

Voting Results
75% Normal
Based on 12 votes (9 yes)
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Comments ( 1 )
  • RoseIsabella

    I think waking up angry is normal for someone like yourself considering what you have been through in the course of your life. Maybe you are experiencing some form of post traumatic stress disorder?

    If I were you I would discuss this stuff as little as possible with your family, because they only serve to trigger you. Have you ever seen a therapist or counselor? I think it could be of great help to you.

    I dunno if you have a job and insurance, but if you do you could call your insurance provider and ask them to refer you to a good therapist. Another option would be to ask your pastor for a reference for someone who does therapy on a sliding scale. You can also check with any universities in your area to see if they have low cost therapy there that is done by graduate students. Additionally you could call a crisis hotline and ask them for suggestions.

    I don't know if you are a person of Faith or not, but I would highly recommend that you keep your discussions of your problems, and spirituality with your mother to a minimum if she actually makes you feel worse. You need to discuss these things with people who encourage and sympathize with you, not those who criticize or discourage you. I want to recommend some books to you:

    *Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life
    Book by Henry Cloud, John Pearson, and John Townsend

    *Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren't
    Book by Henry Cloud, John Pearson, and John Townsend

    Something else that has helped me a lot have been the twelve step programs of:

    *CODA Codependents Anonymous
    http://coda.org/

    *ACOA Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families
    https://adultchildren.org/

    I your plight feels familiar to me, and I wish you all the best!

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