Is it normal to resent my so called "boyfriend"

73% Normal
17 Comments

Is it normal that I resent my so called boyfriend?
We've been together almost 7 years, and we have 2 daughters. Well let me cut to the chase, he will NOT let me do anything without him complaining and textig me literally every second. I seriously can not go 5 minutes without him texting me or calling me every second yelling an screaming, and when I get home he sometimes will et so out of hand he gets abusive. & I just feel no one will ever want me because I have 2 kids and I go to school full time. I just don't know what I should do. So I'm asking is it normal to resent him??

Voting Results
73% Normal
Based on 63 votes (46 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • RubyCane
    11 years ago

    Ditch his pathetic ass, you got plenties of strength and will to carry on by yourself... And have no worries, if you are an interesting and/or attractive person, a real man won't back up in the idea of you having children. Trust me! ;)

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  • Bambie1234
    11 years ago

    Well thanks for the advice. I think I think I need to start looking for a apartment and leave. Last night I slept in my daughters room because he started screaming and everything because I asked him where some Tylenol was because my head was killing me. It's seriously just random things like that, that shouldn't set him off. :/ I just need to find an apartment an leave.
    Thanks again for your advice :)

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    • GuessWho
      11 years ago

      Take your daughters with you. They shouldn't grow up around a guy like that.

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  • thinkingaboutit
    11 years ago

    It's not easy. I believe you can do it.

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  • Lynxikat
    11 years ago

    Get OUT of that relationship! If not for yourself, but for your kids- the last thing you want to do is let your daughters grow up in that environment.

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  • Captain_Kegstand
    11 years ago

    Ditch that jealous piece of crap and move on. He is obviously insecure or he wouldn't act this way towards you. Meaning he knows you are too good for him!

    Take your kids, get that SOB out of your life, and don't let your children be raised in that kind of situation. Can you imagine the long term effects of that upbringing on a child? Also, you deserve much much more than your sorry ass "boyfriend"

    Any guy that wants to get abusive with a woman, can come my way and pick on someone their own gender.

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  • ebonysky
    11 years ago

    I was with my boyfriend for almost 9 years. I found the courage to end it because I don't want our kids to think relationships should b like that. And I knew I deserved to b happy. There is a man out there for you. My advice is to end this relationship now, get ur life together for your kids and urself and worry about love later. It will find u.

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  • ygrowup
    11 years ago

    No one has the right to be abusive to you, and if he lays hands on you, call police and file a report. Then have him move out, and pick your life up again. It may could get better with counseling if you can get him to go. If not, make plans to start over, you are strong enough to do it!

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  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago

    Dear god, why don't you leave him?! You admit that he's abusive, but yet you continue to be with him. You have two kids by him, but yet you won't leave him?? Go to the fucking police and tell them what's been going on. Get a restraining order if need be.

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  • monkeybrain
    11 years ago

    Get the fuck out of that crazy shit. This guy is unhinged. You sound lovely. Take your girls and run the fuck away!

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  • Saycheese
    11 years ago

    Uh... get away from him. He is no help in your life. You girls and your low-self esteem. You'll find someone to actually care about you if you try and care for yourself that is. Don't let others put you down like your boyfriend.

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    • flutterhigh
      11 years ago

      Okay, before we jump to conclusions about a complete stranger as described in a secondhand account, let's assess the damn situation.

      Here:

      1. If your boyfriend is physically harming you or your children, you need to contact the police immediately. No question. Do NOT stay in an abusive relationship, and do NOT let your children grow up in a violent home.

      2. If he's not an immediate danger to you or your children, the next step is to decide whether this relationship can be fixed. Have you tried to have a calm conversation with him about this issue? If not, you absolutely should. You'd be surprised how much can be fixed with honest, relaxed communication.

      3. If having a calm conversation didn't work, consider going to couple's therapy. This may help with communication and anger issues. It's nothing to be embarrassed about, all relationships have their issues.

      4. If you've tried this and it hasn't worked or you're otherwise unwilling to go, you should leave the relationship. If you're simply not happy and you don't see it getting better, you need to try to find something else. It's easy to think that at this point you should take what you can get. But that's not healthy. And it isn't good for your daughters to grow up with angry, argumentative parents.

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      • Saycheese
        11 years ago

        I was going by what she had said also if you look at what comments she had made too.

        I was telling them to get away because you shouldn't have to deal with the abuse; which they "did" mention.

        Also the guy is crazy it's obvious; he won't stop screaming and yelling at her and won't let her live her life.

        Normally you can't fix these kind of relationships here. But yes if they do have a calm conversation maybe things will workout better, but I seriously wouldn't want to deal with the crap that happened and like she said she just asks simple questions calmly and he gives her crap.

        She is obviously at number 4 and can't deal with it. :\

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        • flutterhigh
          11 years ago

          I am completely opposed to jumping to conclusions and voting to immediately end a seven year parental relationship based on one secondhand anecdote. We don't know either of these people. I'm not trying to be cynical, but we can't throw out the possibility that it was mis-phrased, misinterpreted, or even exaggerated. She didn't explain what she meant by "abusive" (I'd imagine that if he's violent, THAT would presumably be the focus of this story), so I told her what to do in the event of two different types of abuse (physical and emotional).

          Think of it this way. If the relationship is truly violent and tumultuous, taking your advice would have the same result as my advice, right? Either way she would leave. But if the relationship is salvageable and not violent, then your advice leads to unnecessarily dissolving the parental figures of two girls, while mine makes an attempt to save it. Basically we said the same thing, except I didn't assume the relationship was unfixable, so I offered advice on what to do if it is fixable.

          I'm not trying to attack you, I just think it's important to be levelheaded in any situation instead of potentially being impulsive with other people's lives.

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          • Saycheese
            11 years ago

            I think she just needs to get away from him a little while and then see where it goes.

            Yes I don't think it would be right to take two daughters away from the father either, not one bit unless he is violent toward them too. And thats not what I was saying either. I was saying she needs to get a away from the bullcrap but at the same time I know I was misleading from what I had said. :)

            But yes since he is the father he has a right to see his daughters. But in the relationship I don't see much happening.

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  • Peptox
    11 years ago

    You need to either talk to him or leave. His controlling and abusive behavior needs to stop right now. This is serious bullshit and not you nor your children deserve it.

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  • flax
    11 years ago

    Don't let your children be exposed to an environment that can damage them or their progression into life in any way. Leave, and start from scratch. You will be surprised how much further you will get without him in your life.

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