Is it normal to rent a tux?

I was downtown browsing for a tux rental and some fake surveillance cameras. I was buzzed, not drunk. It was sprinkling outside, and I had forgotten my comb. Luckily I was that kind of buzzed where you think you look gooooood. I had a Jewish bankroll, I still had some Christmas money left over and I was out to spend it on some mid-day strippers.

That is, until I saw her.

An unfortunate soul. She looked bewildered, laden with shopping bags and having limited mobility. I wondered, why didn't she have a scooter? The Scooter Store guarantees approval. Maybe she had too much pride. Or maybe she was holding out for a Hoveround with the cup holder and the free pocket magnifier.

Whatever. I felt obligated to help her. Drab, dreary day, wet, slippery, and she had to ascend a few flights of stairs judging by the building she was about to enter. I'm a young man, I can help.

I approach and offer assistance, she accepts hesitantly. As I take the majority of the bags from her, she fumbles in her cotton house dress for her keys. We enter the building and as I suspected, she is several flights up on the 6th floor.

As we climb the stairs, she slips her bony hand into my back pocket. She's too old to be making a dash for my wallet, I assume, so I figure she's just looking for stability for the journey up. Yes, I was right...at least partially. I think I feel her finger making little circular motions on my taut bottom!

We reach the 6th floor finally, I hear some scratching and meowing...haha, stereotypical old woman with an assload of cats. She shakily puts her key in the door and the door squeaks open, it's dim inside and we receive a furry assault. Cats! At least 7 cats! Most of them are fine with me being there but a couple are leery of me. Oh well, I kick through and place the bags on the kitchen floor.

She turns to me and thanks me, complimenting my strength and youth. I can tell she needs to be fucked. She wants it, everything points to this conclusion.

I left. There was only 15 more minutes to get the half-price deal on a tux and I wasn't missing that for anything!! Yeah, I thought about her popping her teeth out and rocking my world with a toothless BJ but man, I had to be at my cousin's beauty school graduation this weekend and it just wasn't worth risking losing that tux rental.

is it normal to pass up a toothless BJ to secure the tux rental for beauty school graduation? I'm kinda regretting it now but it is what it is.