Is it normal to really want the guy i was messing around with?

81% Normal
7 Comments

I was hooking up with a guy because I didn't want a relationship. It went on for about 2 months until he told me he was moving on and felt like I was getting attached, which I was certain I wasn't. I brushed it aside and a week later, after walking past him on campus, realized that I really still like him. I needed to get it off my chest so I told him, to which he replied "I'm sorry but I am not interested in a relationship right now". Days later, I found out he was into a girl on the rugby team, who, in many other unbiased peoples' opinions, have said they would not date and that nothing would happen between him and her. Now every time I see him my heart drops and I just want to have him for myself. Is it normal? Is it normal to want to hang onto the notion that something might someday happen between us? I really don't ever experience emotions about people because I'm very guarded.

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 21 votes (17 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 7 )
  • kamilion
    12 years ago

    i just wanted to add that i think its normal. but i think it might have more to do with your feelings being hurt than your feelings for him.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • kamilion
    12 years ago

    you slept with him and enough that it proves you did like him enough to do so. you became attached and now you cant have him so you have separation anxiety and he tells you no so now you feel rejected too.

    but you didn't care before. did you ever really have conversation with him or get to know him really well? did you really like him that much?

    went through something similar last year

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • saturdaynightfun
    13 years ago

    if the dudes that big of a jerk then hire a hitman 2 scare him into liking u lol....dont actually do that bcuz well its illegal

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • SamuraiPeeper
    14 years ago

    Yeah, it's normal. It's very hard sometimes to divorce physical desires and pleasures from emotional ones. He sounds like he's been very up front, so be careful not to rationalize yourself a victim or romanticize your relationship or his intentions. Try your best to move on.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
      -
    • caspraw47
      14 years ago

      Great advice. Thanks :)

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    I would just tell him. If he says no, then it is the same answer as if you don't ask and what if he says yes?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • sarah5566
    14 years ago

    Yeah it's completely normal to feel that way. I've had similar occurrences like that happen to me. As a girl, it is really easy to become attached to guys you fool around with. From what I understand, when we have orgasms the brain releases a chemical which causes you to associate feelings to the person you are with. Guys don't have the same chemical reaction, so they are less easily attached to the girls they hook up with. It sucks, I know. I feel ya.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0