Is it normal to put ants in my penis?

Recently I've been experimenting inserting various things into my penis using a catheter I stole from the old folks home while volunteering there. I realized what could bring me more joy than letting fire ants crawl up my dick so I went outside to collect the little guys and put them in a bottle. I then inserted the catheter into my weiner and the ants went marching in one by one, hurrah. Afterwards I proceded to jack off until I started squirting them out. The burn felt a million times that of a normal jizz. The euphoric pleasure of them biting the inside of my dick was even better than putting hampsters up my ass. Anyways this gave me an idea so I collected more of them and dumped them down my tube once again. I then drove behind the wal-mart and got one of them cheap hookers. I gave her some meth and she got in my car and I whipped out my cock and she started sucking it. I will always remember the look on her face as I jizzed ants into her mouth. Anyways is this normal behavior?

Voting Results
53% Normal
Based on 230 votes (121 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • AssBurgers

    Oh dear, someone needs to go back to troll school.

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  • charli.m

    " ants went marching in one by one, hurrah"

    Oh fuck that was funny!

    Cute story.

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  • drugsrbadmkay

    You should try it with rock salt and vinegar too.

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    • Avant-Garde

      Mmm... I think baking soda might be better. That way he could have a volcanic eruption and reenact the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.

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  • thatonegirl18

    I really hope you joking. If not, you are very fucked up and need help.

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  • Wendell

    <Adds to "best of">

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  • ant rapist :(

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  • NoraBaker

    No! It's not called the normalist movement! It's the surrealist movement. Now put a soft clock over your dick, a couple long-legged mini elephants on fire in the background, a giant swan fucking your wife as a semi-nude saint in the middle of the orange sky and paint it! Rush now, Dalí-boy!! Say hi to Buñu!

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  • dude_Jones

    An absolutely wonderful story. Creative perversion has never been funnier!! ROFL!!

    (Where is angel_in_a_glass_dress when we need her?)

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  • outlaw3365

    I don't believe this crap!! I think you probably think about this stuff but you are a chicken shit in the end

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  • RandomGirl391

    I feel sick now :(.

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  • dillhole

    I am dying, omg

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  • lostgirl62

    U really need some help dude, that is just so fcking disgusting!!!!!!! I can't believe people actually said this is normal, this is in NO way normal!!!!!!!

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