Is it normal to not want to be white?

Your a white female you got a golden ticket ! You rather be an ugly black chick??? Insecure colored women are probably jealous/angry because men prefer white girls. If you hate yourself for being white you are an idiot!

In ways I kind of identify, as a "mixed" person who just looks flat white.

My Dad was brown, but by random genetics I guess I came out even fairer complexioned than my white mother (blue-grey eyes and everything). Milkman jokes aside, in terms of facial bone structure and features, there's (just) enough there resembling my Dad that I know for certain he's definitely my Dad, ok. I had wondered at times, not to slander my mother but there's such difference and people had commented. It does things to a fragile teen's mind, as I was then.

It's not so much my looks that bother me, in fact (not to be big-headed, just honestly) the vibe I get is that some people find me quite attractive.

It's more peoples' reactions, because for whatever reason people get BLUNT and open with their casual racism when they can't cleanly categorize you, or when you present some race-bending enigma to them. I'm used to what I call "the gawp", which is when people who know my name before finally see what I look like. I even had one doctor, this killed me lmao, he was so visibly shocked that the very FIRST words he could only fathom to spit out were "how long ago did your family come here?"

What an introduction, no shade

seriously!you rather be something else?to bad you cant change you racist!

Move?

YOu spelled colour with a U.. What town are you from in Canada, UK OR AUS OR NZ that is full of Hispanics and Blacks? This is a fake question.

Fuck them all.

A great number of the English speaking nations are majority white, so at least you have plenty of escape routes.

The problem with, say, an Asian person born in the US, is that all the large Asian communities primarily speak Asian languages. Sure, I could start learning Japanese now in hopes that I could one day move to Japan and live with people of similar genetic background with whom I can relate and feel accepted, but I'll always have the disadvantage of Japanese not being my first language. In a world where verbal proficiency is so important, I don't consider living in a nation where I must speak a secondary language a viable option.

I would much prefer your situation over mine. I'm trapped with nowhere to go, while you have the chance to escape it. Be grateful you have an exit, and start saving up money to move.