Is it normal to not want my best friend and best cousin to be happy?

39% Normal
7 Comments

I know a lot of this is coming from jealousy that "their lives are better than mine" when actually they aren't. My cousin is simply prettier than me, and she had more money than me, so that's my jealousy on her side, because my family doesn't have that much money so I don't have as much or as nice of things as her. My best friend's life actually sucks, but she is a bit more popular than me, and it hurts that she pays more attention to other people, and they pay more attention to her (though I never told her this because I don't want to seem obsessive or something). Also, she has more experience in the relationship department, and she's liked more than me. That's the jealousy from her side. Is it really possible to be SOOOO jealous of someone that you're actually glad that they're in pain (feelings-wise)? Or am I literally that bad of a person? :/ [Note: I am a generally nice person, and I do not know where this is all coming from!]

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39% Normal
Based on 36 votes (14 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • JuliusE
    12 years ago

    Unfortunately, the ugly, unsuccessful, intellectually challenged, morally weak (having no self-control), also known as those with the "slave mentality" according to Nietzsche, will always desire the destruction (the infliction of pain in your case) of their betters. Basically, it IS normal, but it is a sign of your ACTUAL and TRUE inferiority. A truly noble person would wish for people to reach their fullest potential, they would celebrate and love beauty, not wish to destroy it. People such as yourself are contemptible.

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  • icecreamgurl
    10 years ago

    No offense, but that is just really immature and selfish of you. If you really loved your friend and cousin from the bottom of your heart, you would want them to be happy. Their success would make you happy. I guess some people would never feel that way :/

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  • littlelulu1999
    12 years ago

    Jealousy is normal. But NOBODY'S LIFE IS PERFECT. On the surface it might appear that way and that's why we feel jealous, but EVERYBODY has a hangup/problem/issue/abnormality. You just don't walk in their shoes or are around them 24/7 to see this for yourself. It's called Yin-Yang theory...rarely is anybody's life in perfect balance...And if you could switch lives with someone else who you wish you could be, you'd eventually regret it. Own your own life, your own walk, own and be proud of what you have been given, make something of your gifts, talents...we all have something we are good at/makes us happy....you are wasting precious time and energy being jealous, and you need to take back this jealous energy/time, transform this negative energy into energy to spend on loving yourself, focusing on your own life and living the best life you can, and feeling good about yourself....

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    • mittens4444
      12 years ago

      Easier said than done.

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      • littlelulu1999
        12 years ago

        nothing in life is easy....

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  • MissClaire
    12 years ago

    It's typical to want to bring someone down to your own (perceived) level of whatever emotions you are having at the time. If you are sort of miserable and you see someone who is happy (or appears to be at least) you will try to knock them down to your level - It's not fair that they are happy and I am not - otherwise you don’t feel like you are speaking the same language. Here comes in the phrase, misery loves company (though I am not saying you are miserable by any means). If you flipped this around and were completely happy and you see a miserable person...... what do you do? Usually avoid this person because you don’t want them to bring you down. To counter act you could be happy (soul searching required ;) and try to bring people up to your level - which can be exhausting - that’s why a lot of happy people choose to be with other happy people.
    Don’t let what you do, or your successes determine your true self. For example: "If I'm not a doctor, I am nothing" this person is associating their identity to being a doctor and if they do not achieve this, they will feel exactly what they said 'nothing'. Well that’s not them, that’s just an idea in their head conjured up from who knows where (parents, ego, peers).

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    laziness i think thats where its coming from

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