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Unfortunatly, I'm shallow. I really am. I judge people by their appearances. I'm not sure I wanna change that, but let's assume I did - I can't think of any way how to do so.
Can you help me? Is there a way to learn, how to value personality over looks?
Make yourself as ugly as possible for an entire week and see how people in society treat you.
Maybe that will grow you some empathy for people who were not born looking good.
I see the best in every individual. Try doing the same. Everyone has atleast something special about them, in a good way.
Travel.
Volunteer in a soup kitchen.
Talk to a homeless person about their life. (Some will surprise you.)
Talk to the people you judge.
Ask yourself why you judge them.
Does that make you happier?
Does that make you a better person?
It's important to understand that you don't have all the answers. You are not as smart as you think you are, and there are 7 billion people on this planet who know things you don't, but still somehow you're still a worthwhile person. Why not extend the benefit of the doubt to the rest of humanity?
allright, point by point.
a)I have travelled, a lot.
b)Why would I do that?
c)Right now I am homeless myself.
d)I don't know most of them. It works like this: I see a person on the street and can't help thinking: "Jesus, this one is UGLY. I want nothing to do with this person."
e)I don't know. I'm still thinking about it.
f)No. However, it doesn't make me unhappy either.
g)Probably not, but who's to judge?
You don't really display any sign whatsoever of wanting to improve with these answers.
Why would you work in a soup kitchen? You have to ask that?? Because being a decent human feels good. It's genetically programmed inside our physiology to, because we are a social animal, and the success of our species relies on helping each other out.
Not that the soup kitchen is the end-all in being decent, just one of a trillion outlets to do so.
Also, apparently you're one to judge. Based on looks. But I do it, too, sometimes. Honestly though I have no problem associating with people I see as ugly, I just am shallow about romance / intimacy with them.
I'm not sure why you are shallow about looks when it comes to merely interacting with another human. Try thinking about how most people would look at you if they knew what you were thinking about the people you judge?
As I said, I'm not sure I want to change that about me.
About the soup kitchen: I know that it's a good thing to do. What I meant was - how is that gonna help overcome my shallowness? I mean, I could give someone a plate of soup and still think: Here you go, uglyface.
Your last question: Well, they would probably wanna kick me in the nuts. Good thing they don't know.
An effective way out of being shallow seems not to exist.
I am same... I am ever judging people even if I don't want... It is normal but I really want to change but I can't!
I would love to meet you and spend the day with you. I think someone talking to you in person and showing you a different way to think and or approach life would be good. I think you want to change but dont know how.
yes, it's hard with everything around us to see the beauty within past the ugly on the outside.
Just make sure that you give them a chance before you totally reject them