Is it normal to not know how to meet girls in college?

87% Normal
12 Comments

I finished my first year in college at a big party school. I was able to make friends fine, but the problem is they were all guys. I have no clue, how to meet girls and hook up. Part of the problem was I went to really small schools my whole life, so there were a lot of people you were forced to get to know. In college its the complete opposite. The only people who it was easy to get to know were my floor mates, and unfortunately it was all-male floor.

All of my classes were giant lectures and they were like only twice a week, so it seemed really hard to meet people in there. I managed to become friendly with some people and some of them were girls but none of them I really got to know. I also met other girls who lived in my building, and became friendly with them, but it never led to anything. Apparently you're supposed to meet people in clubs, but no one I'm friends with seems to be in a club. I joined an intramural team, and another club, but still no luck in finding girls. Meeting girls in parties was also really tough since they were all so loud, and you could rarely talk to them. Plus getting into parties was hard since they rarely let people in if you don't have girls with you.

So my question is where did you meet people that you dated/ had sex with? I mean I'm a friendly guy, and I'm willing to ask girls out. I just don't understand the correct way of doing it. Am I really supposed to just ask a girl I barely know to get lunch? It's so different from high school. I did that once and she said no. Am I socially retarded or something? I'm scared I'm going to graduate college a virgin.

Voting Results
87% Normal
Based on 23 votes (20 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Just tell them what they want to hear. When I try to get myself in to a group, sometimes the majority of members being female, you just let them hear what they want to hear, then you pretty much have them in your palm if you do it right.

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    • Silberpfeil
      11 years ago

      And what exactly is it that girls love to hear?

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        To tell them how great they are in a subtle way, yet in a way you are not sucking up to them.

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        • Silberpfeil
          11 years ago

          Could you give an example please?

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          • [Old Memory]
            11 years ago

            It depends on the person. You have to find out what they are striving to achieve, then add a comment telling them that they're good at what they're trying to achieve, attractiveness, intelligence, etc.
            I also entirely depends on how you say it as well, so an example would be pointless to give due to it being about body language as well.

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  • sunshinemoonlight
    7 years ago

    it can be intimidating

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  • Francophile22
    11 years ago

    Same as you, small town, everyone knew everyone else; college I had no clue, I Lost my virginity to a person my classmates set me up with, Except for the first semester I did not date, I didn't even have luck asking women to dance during school sponsored rock concerts. But I think it's more than the setup we each inherit at birth, I think it's genetic. Take away all of Warren Buffet's $$ and in one year he will be a millionaire at least. Some have that knack with women and I don't.

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  • false_ninja
    11 years ago

    U might want to get them while theyre sober so u know the real them but seriously all u have to do i just be random at first then if they laugh and give u attention talk to them and try to be interesting but not to joking because they may never take u seriously and once u have a friendship started they will introduce u to other girls and u will be in their group then when u r comfortable ask the girl out then maybe u will get laid

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  • Silverloin
    11 years ago

    I personally agree with davesumba :D

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  • davesumba
    11 years ago

    it is a LOT easier than you think, just be confident and go up to someone you'd like to get to know better. and if they say no, don't think anything of it, theyz probly a bitch anyway. and if it's just for sex, just go to a party, wait til maybe 12-1am and just make a move, most girls don't know how to say no, or are lookin for the same thing you are. and ItDuz has it right, tell em what they want to hear, compliment them and what not

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  • prasatko
    11 years ago

    I think that I know exactly what you are talking about.

    As for me, it helped when I had male friends (or female friends) and they brought their friends (some of whom were female). So meeting girls via other people who already knew me was helpful in my case. But it can take time, one big problem is that most of the girls were taken at the time I wanted to date them... In my case, alcohol (not big parties, but normal pubs...) often played to my advantage but it should not be recommended, I guess.

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  • KeddersPrincess
    11 years ago

    Well, to be frank, all the guys that asked me out in college literally did just randomly come up to me and ask me out. They just talked to me out of the blue, and I didn't know a one of them. My suggestion to you is to not be shy or timid and just ask a girl out. If she's like me, she won't think anything negative of you, but she will just see that you are a guy that is interested in her and wants to go out. Go for it. What do you have to lose?

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