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Whenever someone around me is extremely upset about something, such as not getting through an audition or losing a pet/relative, I don't actually feel for them. It's not like I'm mean or unkind because I usually end up pretending I understand what they are feeling and going through.
Anyone else get me???
No. You're the only one like this. Out of seven billion odd people, you are the only one like this. You are an oddity unlike anyone else. What are you, an Alien?
Whether or not I feel for the person in crisis depends on who he or she is and whether or not I like the person. I honestly try to have compassion, but I just can't relate to some people's problems so I just get all quiet and then excuse myself. I try not to fake sympathetic responses as that is codependent and takes too much effort on my part. Besides it will keep em coming back for more. Often times I'll ignore and not return phone calls. Sometimes I'll go completely balls out and give them honest and sincere advice which is usually not what they want to hear.
I dunno if I would care about whether or not someone had a bad audition, but I certainly have tons of compassion if someone has lost a pet! For the most part I don't give a fuck about someone whining about their dysfunctional codependent relationship, especially if they're not willing to learn, get out of the situation and work on the character defects and underlying issues that put them there in the first place.
I just pretend to give a crap about others so they feel better, either that or change the subject so they'll shut up about their problems.
Same here.
Why should we give a fuck about not giving a fuck?
It's not illegal not to feel.
that's kind of a good way to be, they might come to you for comfort, and if you are actually sad/crying too it would just make them feel worse, at least i think so
No, of course it's normal to feel this way, because it's part of what humans are. Although, it's probably not normal to suggest this is normality and then have a piss in your pants when it turns out you are wrong.