Is it normal to not be in love with your boyfriend after a year?

I care about my boyfriend so much & he means the world to me & just the thought of losing him gets me so upset but I don't feel as if I love him.
We've been together for a full year & I'm still not in love with him. When I tell people this they think it's strange & they say I should break up with him.
Is this normal?

Voting Results
52% Normal
Based on 64 votes (33 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Infxmous

    I often have the same problem But mine is a little different in that i start off in love and the feelings tend to cool down over time but i still care a lot for the person and want to be with them. I always do the "could i imagine marrying this person" test. I think about if i could live with them everyday for the rest of my life, if they would be a good provider, a good dad, a good partner. If i would be satisfied letting go of certain habits to be with the person. If i could live with them and never want more or think of anyone else, etc. If they pass this test then its fine. If not then imo its better to end the relationship sooner than later because it will be worse down the road and go forbid it gets serious. If you cant envision the rest of your life with this person and only this person then hes not for you. Love is a very subjective thing and you find it in many places. My boyfriend loves me for the way i treat him but i love my boyfriend for his qualities like his independence and devotion to his family. Maybe if you figure out what kind of love is important to you, ie, what you think its important to love a person for, you will understand better if this person meets your criteria.

    Best of luck to you

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    • 53739

      Well said!

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  • tbiM20

    How old are you? YOU ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO FEEL LOVE WITHIN A CERTAIN TIMELINE! If you don't feel love yet, don't tell him you do. Be open and honest, with him and yourself. Explain your feelings. It's yours and his relationship, & if he's comfortable giving you time, don't let people on the internet tell you its bad!

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress

    If you've been with him a year and you still don't LOVE him, it's time to let him go.

    Sure it's easier to stay because... it's convenient. And the attention he gives can be addicting.

    But if you don't love him... then you're just using him. And he deserves better than that.

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  • cannibus14

    well its more normal after a year to feel the love that you want to feel from the relationship. but maybe you just haven't yet decided what you want. when you're one year in you can't still be hoping for an inner burst of feeling or an epiphany of love, but you could still work on gradual acceptance. i know it sounds bleak but 'love' is far from a clear cut description and the level of passion required varies from person to person. for me, love is an inner acceptance of having the person in my life and of being in theirs that really just feels right

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  • Saycheese

    He is more like a best friend to you. I would suggest breaking up with him. It doesn't mean you two can't still be friends.

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