Is it normal to not be able to delete things?

80% Normal
3 Comments

I just think about my boyfriend cheating on me all the time. I know that he never would, but I bring this up to him all the time and I am afraid that eventually he will. He had been talking to a girl over the internet for a while and when he started dating me, he stopped talking to her, or she stopped talking to him. I keep getting paranoid that all my relationships will end up the same way that they always do, because of cheating. A couple of months ago my boyfriend had an app on the his phone that I wasn't familiar with, a texting app I think and well, the girl who he had been talking to before was on there and it said that he had been texting her a couple days before. He told me that he would stop talking to her, but he had been having trouble letting the girl go. He wouldn't delete the app he was texting her on and he wouldn't let me look on his old phone... I think it was because he had pictures of her on it. Eventually it got to the point that I couldn't stand the thought of him talking to her just because I knew that he had thing for her once upon a time. But i mean, How could you forget that a girls pussy is on your computer??? Is it normal for men to not want to delete anything?

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80% Normal
Based on 5 votes (4 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • dom180
    11 years ago

    Speaking from a male perspective, you sound very controlling. Just because he is talking to a girl doesn't mean he's even attracted to her whatsoever. You need to start trusting him or you'll start pushing him away. Being wrongly suspicious of him cheating could end up being a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    From your post it is hard to tell what is reality and what is merely your suspicion. Do you know for a fact that he used to be into her, or is that your paranoia? Do you know for a fact that he's still talking to her, or is that just guesswork? Have you actually SEEN pictures of her on his computer or phone, or do you just believe they are there?

    Just because he doesn't want you to use his phone or see his computer does NOT mean he has anything to hide. Guys, and people in general, value being trusted and value having an element of privacy. Just because your boyfriend wants some privacy does NOT mean he is using that privacy to get involved with another girl.

    You say if he had pictures of her then he'd be stupid not to delete them. Maybe you should consider that he doesn't have the pictures at all.

    This is an important thing to remember: if he didn't want to be with you, he would not have chosen you instead of her. He cares about you.

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    • mulanmalice
      11 years ago

      I am not controlling. He is the one that let me look on his computer. I know now that I can trust him. I just let most of my own insecurities from past relationships get in the way. I do have a history of severe paranoia though. My doctor who prescribed me all these medications for sleeplessness, adhd, bipolar disorder, anxiety, and depression didn't know that the whole time I was having episodes of anger and sadness, my thyroid wasn't working properly. So sometimes it is hard to decide whether or not my past relationships were bad or if my medications, 7 of which I were on, made me lose reality of what was going on internally and externally. I understand now that I can't do this to him. Especially if has done no wrong to me. Thank you for this. It honestly helped :)

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    First off, what he's doing isn't okay :/ :/ :/ I would be bothered too, weather I've been cheated on before or not. Especially if he had pictures of her. It's obviously bothers you, so break up. Not being able to stop talking to a girl he used to like and not letting you see the conversations is not okay. You need to find a way to get over your insecurity though, no man is ever going to want to put up with that, and there are men out there that don't deserve to.

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