Is it normal to masturbate to memories of being molested?
I was molested when I was younger. No penetration. My uncle introduced me to tongue kissing at the age of 9 because "boys liked experienced girls". Then while standing in the kitchen he licked and sucked on my breasts because guys didn't like girls who didn't like getting their breasts sucked and licked. Later that night he came into my room and took my panties off and ate me out. He calmed me down when I started to panic when I was close to cumming. He told me to just let it happen. Eventually I started to enjoy it. This happened almost every weekend for years. He told me if I told anyone he would burn down my house. Did I forget to mention he was an arsonist? There were even a few time where I went to his house and he would put me on the table eat me and his woman suck him off, or have her eat me and he would be behind her screwing her.
Now when Im horny and masturbate I look back onto those memories and they get me off. I think about them and I am instantly dripping wet. When I am with a man and he's not doing anything for me I look back on these memories and am instantly into it. Is this normal?