Is it normal to love your best friend even when you are straight?

90% Normal
7 Comments

Okay, so to start off I'm a female. I have two best friends, we have known each other for a few years now. We have helped each other through all hard times, and problems. We tend to hug everyday, which has been normal for us ever since we met... But after a few months we started really caring about each other, and caring about each other's happiness more than our own. And a little after that we started saying "I love ya girl!" And stuff like that to each other, and we mean it as "I love you as a friend". Recently I've noticed that one of them is getting closer to me than the other one... Now is a good time to remind you a am TOTALLY STRAIGHT. I've found recently that I think about her more than I used to... And every time I do think of her I have these heartstrings that are pulled which causes me to think about how much I care about her. I already knew that when I told her "I love you" I ment it, I do care about her, and my other friend, A WHOLE FREAKING LOT. But I kinda feel like I love her more than I ever have......

Again I'm straight. And I've never pictured having sex with a woman, and especially not doing it with her..... That's because I'm as straight as anyone can get... My question really is more than one. Is this normal? If this has happened to you what did you do? And should I tell her?

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90% Normal
Based on 21 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • 55588
    9 years ago

    this has happened to me as well so like I do most times when I get confused/lost, I sat down and prosesed it. I soon found that the love I had was in a way I would give my life for this person. Not beacause I wanted to be in a relationship with them, I just wasnt used to that viracious love for someone not in my family. That day something inexplicable became so profound...I was in love with my best friend, but this world has changed the words "in love" to something its not. It doesn't mean to want a relationship with them I just simply couldn't imagine a life without this person, beacause I cared about them more then i ever had.

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  • reminiscent
    9 years ago

    There are different kinds of love.
    I had a best friend before he moved... I loved him dearly... like a brother
    I also love my mom... I love my bf and my daughter.
    I only want to have sex with one of the people I have listed ... and thats my bf.
    you can love someone a whole lot and not want To have sex with them.

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    • Rosie1
      9 years ago

      But... there is one thing I left out and it goes with your answer..... you kiss your daughter, your bf, and your mom.. You don't kiss, or want to kiss your friends... A few months ago when I was really upset and distressed about something, she was hugging me, letting me cry on her shoulder then I freaked my self out when I pulled back by staring at her lips and just thinking about how soft and small they looked... it was kinda weird..

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      • reminiscent
        9 years ago

        Well I have given friends kisses on their cheeks.

        Idk maybe your curiouse.
        I never looked at a friends lips before and thought I wanted to kiss them.

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        • Rosie1
          9 years ago

          That's true..... thanks for the help I really appreciate it

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  • kingofcarrotflowers
    9 years ago

    I love my best friend in a " I love you man " kind of way, been friends for 8 years and in that time we've helped each other through stuff, he's helped me through some issues, I've helped him through family issues and foster care etc, we understand each other more than our families do and have gotten to know each other so well we can judge just how the other will act in a situation and can tell immediately if something's up by body language.

    It's also normal to have thoughts of your friend popping into your head, just a minute ago I wondered how his uni work was going, he's been worried about statistics and I know he got some statistics work today so I messaged to ask how it seemed

    The other day I was writing a song and I couldn't finish it which drove me insane when I got a text saying he was wondering how it was turning out and if I'd found the right end ( I still haven't ) because once you become good enough friends what's important to them becomes important to you because you care about them.

    We've said before that we don't really think of each other as frinds , more as ( cheesy as it sounds ) family and after harder times and issues like I mentioned before have said a " I love you dude " followed by a brief man hug and then something like fried chicken.

    Loving someone in a non relationship non sexual way is a normal part of a deep friendship, I love him the way I love dominoes, but more, and a dominoes pizza that I consider family

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  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    Does this post mean you think you can only love somebody you must have sex with? It sure sounds that way.
    I've loved a few men in my life and it really never occurred to wonder if I'm gay or straight. Not even once. Not even the tiniest little bit.
    I'm a straight guy who has loved a few very close male friends and never wanted to have sex with any them.
    A friend is someone you can rely on even if it is inconvenient for them.

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