Is it normal to lose respect for people that think i am attractive

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8 Comments

Let me preface by saying I am a pretty fat and ugly guy. I mean I guess ugly is subjective but I am definitely not what a normal person would find attractive. Anyway I try to get out a bit with my friends and meet new people, I am a bit of an extrovert and most of the time there is no issue. However when someone makes it obvious that they are attracted to me I find it a real turn off to any sort of friendship.

I just think it is kind of gross that someone would want to do stuff with me. I mean if someone is just being nice or their really drunk then it doesn't change my opinion of them. But if someone starts acting like they would like to spend the night or have a relationship, I just think what is wrong with you? If the person is big themselves it does bother me as much because they might just be settling for what they can get but I still think it is sad to be that desperate. But if it is a regular person I tend to think they need mental help or counselling.

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40% Normal
Based on 68 votes (27 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • kellstar79
    12 years ago

    Have you ever thought that maybe you are not as 'ugly' and 'unattractive' as you think you are? You may have body dimorphic disease or maybe you arn't attractive but everyone is attracted to different qualities on a person. I actually usually always go for personality rather than looks because it's the mental stimulation that will hold out in the end, everyone eventually looses looks in the end due to aging. Don't be so hard on yourself! Just because people 'like' you doesn't mean they are desperate!

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    • Kie3PO
      12 years ago

      Excellent response.

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  • Doctorknowsbest
    12 years ago

    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Sometimes we can feel like were being patronized. So lighten up. Anorexic's think their fat when they are really skeletons. Take the compliment and be happy anybody even noticed you. Self Esteem Check.

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  • kittyg7113
    12 years ago

    People start to look different when you get to know them. This works both ways - a beautiful person can start to look ugly if you find out they're really a horrible person. It sounds like these people are falling for your personality, and it makes them attracted to you. They're not just trying to be nice, they're really feeling it. It's also possible that you're being too hard on yourself. "We accept the love we think we deserve." You need to figure out how to convince yourself that you deserve to be loved.

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  • Fozmula
    12 years ago

    Personalities can be attractive too. Maybe you're really friendly, or generous.

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  • crowl13
    12 years ago

    I think many people are attracted to others because of their personalities. I've known "ugly" guys(i.e not fitting into the beauty standars society puts on top of our shoulders) who have many girls chasing them because they are funny and a nice company.

    I am a girl and I feel that when men approach to talk to me just because of my looks they are placing me in the category of an "object", so I just reject them. My current boyfriend noticed me in a lecture where I read my opinion out loud, so he didn't fall for my looks but because of who I am.

    Maybe it could be helpful for you to realize if you are in a similar situation, where someone falls for your personality, not your looks, and give yourself a chance. Most people are superficial, but some are not and can truly find you attractive because of your personality...even "beauty" is subjective. Some guys love fat girls, some girls like ugly boys, etc, etc.

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  • Dizzee
    12 years ago

    I find having sex kind of gross and picturing myself doing it... no, just no. However, if someone said that they loved me... I'd feel grateful as hell. Even if I didn't believe them (which I don't anymore because of certain 'issues' in the past), I'd still feel grateful.

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  • firefly88
    12 years ago

    If ur ugly as you say I'd prob avoid you like the plague. Maybe then you'd find ME attractive cuz I find YOU repulsive

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