Is it normal to just let a friendship go?

71% Normal
8 Comments

Lately it seems that my friendship with a female friend of mine at school is really starting to fade. There doesn't seem to be any communication between us anymore. Before when we first met we used to call & text each other a lot. But for the past few weeks, it feels like I've been putting a lot of time and effort into our friendship while she seems to be doing nothing. It seems whenever I call her, her phone is either dead, or she's in Tijuana, or she's just "busy." We never hung out outside of school before, so today was supposed to be the day we would do that. Last week she looked me in the eye saying that she would be free today and we planned to hang out and have lunch together. Well today I waited for her for about an hour, and no communication from her. I tried calling and texting, still nothing. Even if she did answer her phone when I called, she would only stay for a few seconds saying that she's at the doctor or at the vet, then she would say "let me call you back" and just hangs up on me before I can tell her to wait. I feel like that's so rude I mean we both made a plan, she doesn't show up, and when I try to find out what happened, she's not communicating it to me. This is a deal breaker for me. I'm really thinking of just calling it quits with her because there's just no communication at all between us. I don't wanna let her go, but I don't know how much longer this is gonna go on. I just don't have the patience for this anymore. I feel like I've put up with her crap for far too long. I even told her when we made the plan to let me know if anything changes. She never called or texted to inform me of any changes. I don't even plan on telling her that it's over. I'm just thinking of not saying anything to her at all and just let this friendship die on it's own.

Voting Results
71% Normal
Based on 58 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • Shackleford96
    10 years ago

    Yes, I know exactly how you feel. That type of (personal) social disconnect without communication as for why isn't easy, because as humans we naturally wonder why. Is it me, is it something I did, or is it you, are you okay, is something wrong, do we not have anything in common anymore? So many questions, but no answers. You are left to wonder. Complete closure is impossible, so you can't just let it go so easily.

    It's like, if you don't want to be friends just say so. You don't have to act like you're my friend in person, but when it comes down to it you never want to do anything anymore, avoiding all my phone calls and never returning my messages. I wouldn't be hurt for you to just tell me, but your a fucking pussy and won't do that. That's just being two-faced and cowardly. Have the guts to admit to someone how you feel. But no, admitting that would also mean to admit that their loyalty in the friendship is less than yours. Some people are too prideful for that.

    It won't be easy, because maybe you two really were good friends at one point, but something changed. People change. It will be best if you do let it go, because the friendship is obviously one-sided now and you deserve better. You deserve a friend who will always be there for you when you need them. Unfaltering loyalty and implicit trust. Someone who would stick up for you. Someone who would take a bullet for you, and you would do the same for them. Someone you could go indefinite periods of time without talking to, and years later, when you finally discover that they are still alive, the friendship will begin right where it left off.

    They are hard to find anymore, but there are still some good people in this world. I truly believe in that.

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  • Anonymousfish
    10 years ago

    Just don't waste your time in people that cannot appreciate your effort to make things better.

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  • bodazzy
    10 years ago

    don't make people a priority when they only consider you as an option YOU DESERVE BETTER

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  • SaraB
    10 years ago

    I think you should try talking to her.Tell her how you feel about how she treats you.Its better that you do that maybe she will start to communcate with you more or something.Tell her that you wanna hang out with her more.maybe she will start hanging out with you more.You just never know.if you guys are really good friends then talk to her don't let her go:)

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  • midnightsears
    10 years ago

    I have friend jest like this well a boyfriend but we where dating and I put in so much to make him happy and he seemed to grow more distant every day and I broke up with him and dated anther guy and all I thowt about was him. So I broke up with the new guys and told my ex boyfriend at the time how I felt and he completely understood and we got back together. So try to talk to her about it. It seems she was a good friend and if she continues to blow u of jest walk away you can do better.

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  • LostAndBroken
    10 years ago

    Yep, as much as you don't want to lose her, it'd be better to let her go. Seriously.

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    • vagman30
      10 years ago

      What's really sad is that people these days change their minds about you in the the blink of an eye. And it makes me wonder what did I say or what did I do for them to change their minds about me? If we really are friends then at least have the courtesy to tell me what I did wrong so I'll be sure to never do it again. It seems real friendship is all but a fairy tale now just like true love.

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  • Rangie2720
    10 years ago

    Same here, but in different situation.
    I know how hard it is to let go of someone who used to be so close to you. But she's obviously ignoring you as you stated. @bodazzy was right, you deserve better.

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