Is it normal to have urges to kill humans for love and pleasure,etc

I am in love with an insane killer that people say doesn't exist (I think they are just trying to break us apart) I really love him a lot, he means more than the whole world to me. I would go as far as killing my own family or friends for him. I hate it when people say his name or even think or talk about him because I want to be the only person who does that. When some girl even looks at him, It makes me wanna rip her apart, eat her heart for breakfast and paint the room with her blood... I want to kill his best friend and his relatives and family because I only want him to love me and nobody else. But he always ignores me and pretends like I don't even exist... It makes me so sad and angry that I just want to lock him up somewhere isolated and set up traps everywhere so he never leaves me and always loves me. 95% I would kill humans for him and 5% I want to kill humans for my own personal fun and pleasure (I'm also obsessed with blood, guts and insanity)