Is it normal to have conflicting feelings about going home?

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alright, i'm and have been deployed to a combat zone for almost ten months, and i'm about to go home in about two more. the thing is, even though i've been looking forward to getting out of here for so long, i'm not really sure if i'm ready for this part of my life to be over.

it's almost like those people you hear about in prison for so long that they don't want to leave. i'm sure i'm not at that state, but it seems strange to me because i'll be going from butt-hole afghanistan, to beautiful Germany. i've even volentered to stay here.

can anyone else relate?

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Based on 20 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • moonwarp
    13 years ago

    "whatshesaid" took the words straight out of my mouth, I too was in the forces for. 4 years and had exactly the same doubts and concerns that you have, it was a very daunting prospect with all things and routines "burnt" into my head,but within days of coming home I was completely happy, take care you'll get there.
    Joe

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  • whatshesaid
    13 years ago

    Probably one of the most normal feelings on this site, especially if you've been living by a strict schedule for a while. When you live for several months or years with the unfailing knowledge of what you're doing next or tomorrow or in a week, diving back into an unscheduled life can be hard. The uncertainty that's supposed to feel like freedom can just seem daunting. This doesn't mean you don't love & miss all of your friends and family, it just means that once again you're venturing into unknown territory; except this time, it's not SUPPOSED to be unknown, which can make it even harder.

    I know I haven't really suggested anything to help with this conflict and I'm sorry about that. Good luck, and you're not alone.

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  • dappled
    13 years ago

    If you read "Im Westen nichts Neues", you'll find a war full of people who can relate to that. I don't think it'll bring you much solace, though. I'm really sorry you're in this situation. Good luck.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    yes he is right.

    why dont you try being the one that makes the decision to leave. When its your decision its more respected by you, and not so irritating.

    what is the positive side of all this?
    you are alive, have some bank, and realized that you are totally independent when you need to be.

    those a great things to achieve for yourself.
    Youll be back soo enough if you want.

    ask yourself, when is it long enough to be gone?

    how long is long enough?

    what do i enjoy about my current environment?

    can I compromise and take some situations from my current environment back home?

    like your routine, your alone time, etc

    you can take it with you. you don't have to be emersed in society all at once, you can be in germany in a house and it can be like you want it to feel your in control always.

    yes i can relate.

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    • [Old Memory]
      13 years ago

      I forgot to ask... is their any specific reason why home is not so great? any specific reasons why deployment was so great?

      I think its just your really used to it, and you enjoyed it. at one time though you had to get used to it.

      you have to adjust and acclimate... its normal , it would be really neat if you could totally switch it up and be all for going home, i enjoy being like " oh thank god im going to the dentist today hellyeah"

      neurotic but funny and helpful

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  • ToddStellar
    13 years ago

    Yeah man, I know what you mean.
    I was in rehab for about 11 months, and near the end of it I had ill feelings about going home.
    But when you realize that you are going to have to eventually you end up doing it and it may take a little while to get used to things again, but it happens.

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