Is it normal to have a threesome with my best friend and his friend?

7 Comments

Okay, so my best friend (a married man who loves his wife but occasionally cheats on her without her knowledge in order to preserve his marriage [it's complicated, don't ask]) has this girl who he had had sex with several years ago before his marriage, and who he still hangs out with behind his wife's back (but hasn't had sex with again until now). All three of us have been hanging out together for several months now. Now, up until recently, I have considered myself pretty much gay. I got into a gay relationship years ago that ended after the guy I was with found out that he was transgender, by which time I had already fallen in love with him, so I stayed with him for quite some time in a foolish attempt to try and make it work regardless. We recently realized it wouldn't work out and I broke up with him/her amicably. About a week ago, my friend started jokingly saying that me, him and the girl should have a threesome. We kept talking about it and coming back to it, and I realized that they were both quite serious about it. They were both aware I had been very confused about my sexuality for awhile, and after they convinced me they were serious, I hesitantly accepted the offer and we set it up. I was very excited about it at first, but when it came down to it, I had a sort of nervous mental block that kept me from being able to "summon the necessary rigidity" to fully participate. Not because I wasn't attracted to her, but because I felt pressured to perform and the experience was overwhelming and nerve-wracking, although I was able to reach a weak, anti-climactic finish towards the end of the encounter. This was my first time with a real woman, though not my first time overall. They both understood that the problem was mental and not physical, more to do with nerves than anything, and both expressed a desire to try it again. Afterwards, it was surprisingly not awkward as I imagined it would be, and things are looking like a repeat performance may be in the works.

Yes, try it again 53
Not a good idea/Don't do it again 17
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Comments ( 7 )
  • LIGHTHOUSE
    9 years ago

    can you narrate your threesome chronology?

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  • KeepsakeDoll
    9 years ago

    SUMMARY:
    The OP got invited to try a threesome again and he's scared his performance may end up being bad.

    Extra note: OP is not used to women as he thought himself to be gay.

    Now go vote.

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    • ferriswheelonfire
      9 years ago

      Thanks. I didn't think to separate paragraphs. Haven't been on here in awhile but I thought this was something I could use outside input on.

      To make things even more complicated, the transgender lover I mentioned just called me last night and told me he himself had his first straight experience the same night I did, and is now considering de-transitioning. He's already had breast implants (DD's) and hormones. He's coming home from college for X-Mas break and wants to see me. F*CK MY LIFE

      Oh and did I mention that my best friend (that I had the threesome with) and I have also had sex in the past? I don't think I could dream this sh*t up.

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  • Ellenna
    9 years ago

    Can't read yr post but it looks interesting - can you re-post with paragraphs please

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  • slings_and_arrows
    9 years ago

    Need tl; dr section.

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  • TheChakraMantra
    9 years ago

    Ok, first of all, your friend is a complete shitbag who should not be married if he's just going to cheat on the poor woman that is his wife. If he's unhappy, then he needs to get a divorce or something. He's obviously too immature to realize the pain that comes with being cheated on.

    Secondly, you clearly don't even know what sexuality entails. If you're gay, then you're NEVER going to be attracted to a woman. Attraction isn't something that needs to be forced. It just comes naturally. And even though you might appreciate someone's outward appearance, that doesn't mean you're sexually attracted to them. I'm a lesbian, but I can still recognize when a man is cute.

    It sounds like you were pressured into this situation. Don't let people force you into something you're not comfortable with. If they're really your friends, then they'll respect your decision.

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    • ferriswheelonfire
      9 years ago

      Okay,

      1.) Please don't preach to me about sexuality. I know plenty about sexuality and gender and have been forced to deal with this issue more than most people in their entire lives.

      Like I said, I fell in love with a gay male who began the process of transitioning to female about a year ago, and is now once again unsure of him/herself (BTW, she does a VERY good job of passing, and is considered incredibly beautiful by men and women alike. Girls at her school actually ask her for makeup/sex/clothing advice all the time). We are currently not in a relationship and were not when the threesome occured. So yeah.

      I guess you haven't heard that sexuality is in no way black and white, and that no matter what label you slap on yourself, it's almost never 100%. Ever heard of the Kinsey scale?

      2.) I was not pressured into this. I wanted the experience of heterosexual intercourse so I could be more sure of my own sexuality, and was very enthusiastic about it

      3.) Yes, my friend shouldn't cheat on his wife. However, I don't judge him for it, firstly because it's not my place to, and secondly because he is a good man in almost every other aspect of life. I myself have NEVER been unfaithful, and for that I was rewarded by being cheated on by the one I was faithful to (the same individual I mentioned above). His infidelity is not the topic of discussion here.

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