Is it normal to have a boyfriend who won't stick up for you?

Ok so I don't mean I'm some obsessive freak with my boyfriend! I just mean like the other day some kid hit me in the face with a soccer ball at school and I fell on my knees. My boyfriend didn't say anything to them! Matter of fact he didn't even come over to see if I was ok until five minuets after... Another thing to! Some kid started calling me a whore and such and my boyfriend just walked away and didn't say anything to them!! So plzzzzzz tell me IIN?

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19% Normal
Based on 93 votes (18 yes)
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Comments ( 23 )
  • Depends. Was the people doing it to you in a group of people? Where they twice the size of him?

    In some situations, it's best not to get involved, because they would just pumble your boyfriend to death, where as you would just get a football to the face and name calling.
    The boyfriend would risk far more harm to himself if he came to help, than you would at all.

    Do you stick up for your boyfriend in situations that females do the same to him?

    If it was in the circumstance where he has a good chance of standing a physical chance agaisnt the person doing it, then he obviously isn't the protector type, and dumping him for it is understandable.
    If it was because a group of dangerous people just hit a ball to you and called you a name, and that he riskes major physical harm to defend you, then you can't expect him to do it.

    Besides, aren't women supposed to be strong individuals? Aren't they supposed to be able to do what men do better in "broken heels"?
    Now that I think about it, this irritates me. The whole "females are better than males" thing. The whole "females should get everything equal" and the "Females are strong individuals" thing. Surely if that is the case, you should fight your own battles to show as a female that you're a strong individual, deserve equal rights by going through the same social things males go through, and so on without the protection from a man.

    And if you caused those people to do and say what they did, then you deserve it. If that was the case, your boyfriend done the right thing for making you get the consequences of your actions.

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    • Hoohahohyahhh

      Very true. You would want your boyfriend to get the living daylights out of him just to prove his worth to you? Then it would be the opposite way around, you aren't being a very good girlfriend. As for being called a whore, he can confront the person who said it but he can't really stop the rumors and such. Don't do whore things to get called a whore! Or if the person is just a big mouth punch him in the mouth yourself!!!

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    • dom180

      Initially a good point, descending into the usual misinterpretation that the post was about gender equality, and presumption that the OP was a feminist when you can never know that.

      On AVERAGE women are PHYSICALLY, NOT MENTALLY weaker than men, nobody in their right mind disputes that. While that doesn't mean her boyfriend should be obliged fight her battles for her, it doesn't mean she'd be instead well-advised to fight them herself, as she is even more likely to get beaten to a pulp. And don't say you are only echoing what the OP said about equality, because she never even mentioned equality, not even once. Why you insist on bringing it up is beyond me.

      Besides, you ignore the point that he doesn't even CARE when she gets either physically or emotionally hurt, he just walks on by. The least he should've done was make sure she was okay; I'd hope even a stranger or passer-by would've done that, let alone her boyfriend! That isn't inequality, it's common courtesy!

      Way to ruin a perfectly logical and helpful contribution in the first 4 paragraphs with two huge chunks of opinion, bias and unwarranted aggression stuck on the end.

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      • That_Dude999

        Episode V: The Irony Strikes Back!
        (I know I used this reference before, but : I LOVE STAR WARS YAAAAAYYY)
        Posting a massive letter in which you do mainly two things: Getting annoyed about a certain thing and THEN going on to further deepen that certain thing....
        If you are wondering what that sharp pain in your backside is; that is irony biting you right in the arse.

        To add even more irony to the soup of insult, I shall go even further on the matter (that is just the kinda swell guy I am). Gender differentiation, concerning physical seperation is all but unimportant in this case. Given that the whole incident is based on phyiscality. She got hit in the face accidentally and her bf is supposed to hit some poor little kid because of that? YES SHE SHOULD GO AND FIGHT HER OWN FIGHTS!!!! What kinda stupid ass logic is that? That is the same as one country doing something bad and than another country has to join the wa.... oooh wait...

        I once had a rugby match, in which I was unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of a tackle that knocked the lights out of my head. When I got off the pitch it became clear that I had a major concussion. The pool of vomit leaking from me was a big give away on this one. As I got driven to the nearest hospital my gf had nothing better to do then sit bored next to me and play on her phone. And I was fine with that, because we had already established that this stuff is unimportant to our relationship and I would love her eventhough she didn't give a rats ass about my physical state.
        My point is that you shouldn't go on a website asking complete strangers of their opinion (most of them live under a bridge anyway). A relationship is too complex and individual for an internet community to even attempt to comprehend it, lest draw accurate conclusions to help you in any possible way.
        Here is a wild idea: Go and talk to your boyfriend, explain to him that these things are important to you. You will be suprised about the results!

        Have fun kido!

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      • I can understand that. Physical ability has a lot to do with the work force, which if a woman was employed in to such a job, not doing as much as a male is due to him having more physical strength to put more in to the work, then she'd expect to have equal pay for something males are doing more at.

        She's even "more" likely to be beaten to a bloody pulp? I dissagree. A man is far more likely to be beaten to a bloody pulp by other males than the female is. I can show you video after video of evidence of when women hit someone, and all they do is take it, because that's all they can do. Involving sexual harrassment to a massive manner, in which the boy didn't physcially defend himself.

        I don't know about you, but I haven't males hit a woman once in unfair circumstances, not saying it doesn't happen, but I've seen females start fights willingly with males that would pumble them if they were allowed to hit back, which they aren't. One time when a female smacked a boy, doing nothing, across the face, which he kicked her back. At the time I thought it was wrong, but now believe I it was justified.

        I never said she was a feminist, or tried to imply she was one. What I said was more so aimed at the other commenters that deem the man a "pussy".

        He doesn't even care? Tell me, where did you see that part in the discription? I know I didn't, pretty sure you haven't either. The girl posting this can't be sure of it, either. If you're reffering to the ball thing on the part of him not caring, perhaps the people that done it were still around, or maybe it was a complete accident? She would of wanted him to get conflicted with someone that accidently kicked a ball to her face. The guy mustr of been a pretty good aim if he was intentionally aiming at her face andmade an accurate hit. You replied to me about pressuming things, don't you think that part should be also applied to yourself.
        You also forget that her first thought was that he should come to her defense and get in some sort of conflict with the people responsible before checking if she's ok.

        Perhaps this male did see it happen, you still have no knowledge of if he doesn't care or not. He might even be hurting more due to the fact he knows he can't do anything without the situation getting worse with him involved.

        Well, I haven't seen a female jump to defend males in situations that threaten a male's safety, so where is the common courtesy there? I mean, again, plenty of videos surfing the net when males are in trouble, but females clear the way, where as if a female is in trouble, he is tackled by the first male on site.

        Social gender equality is important in gender equality, and this situation was a good enough example of the social inequality between the genders.

        Just because you deem what I said as "bias andun warranted aggression" doesn't make it so.

        Even now, when I was basically saying about her solving her own problems, that women have been described to be able to do, you go against that. Just like a man can't do anything if a female is calling him names, and could possibly be physically assaulted yet has to still ignore the female, what makes you think a female should get someone run to her defense instead of just ignoring the male calling her name, and walk away?

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        • joybird

          FFS ItDuz change the record about female inequality! You are literally boring the rest of us to death.

          ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

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          • I may be boring them, but that doesn't mean it's not true. Not forcing you to read the debate.

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            • joybird

              I like to read your comments but you are getting sooooo repetitive recently.

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  • cupcake_wants

    He's a bitch! He needs to receive your fingers up his ass to suit his personality..

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  • Posionbites

    The way i view a relationship is that dont go with someone who wont love u, respect u, cheat on u, or protect u is not worth it. If that guy is not backing u or care then i dont think u should be with him. But its up to u

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress

    were you playing soccer?

    as for calling you names... tell the kid he owes you 20 bucks still. that'll shut him up. or make him laugh.

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  • GeorgeMcBob

    If his balls were in his scrotum or in your handbag he'd stick up for you. They're probably in someone else's handbag (his mom's maybe?). Find them and keep them close to you.

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  • lc1988

    Dump him.

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  • Just_feed_me_Troll_Meat

    See alot more needs to be added to this post, when you were hit in the head, did he join in with the obvious laughter of everyone else when it happened? The kid that was calling you a "whore" was that based on any factual behavioral evidence on your part? Since it doesnt seem like he has been dominated by you yet (which is inevitable, since he is most likely a giant pussy) I am guessing you most likely havent been awarded a HS diploma or GED yet?

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  • MissCzech

    Dump him!!

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  • ippyevie

    He's an asshole.

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  • squeeshy

    Ditch the loser

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  • hairyfairy

    I once had a boyfriend who let other guys make passes at me without ever doing anything about it. I knew that he didn`t care about me much, so I dumped him, & you should do the same.

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  • Noodleflower

    Sorry for being repeative btw :p it's an accident :( I just loveeeee talking to people!! DX please don't hate me

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  • Noodleflower

    He is just selfish and has you for show... I use to do the opposite I would stand up for my bf becoz no one tried to fuk around with me... But you will find a better bf than that low life

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  • BoozeWooze

    Than you should dump your scared little boy and find a real man who is strong enouth to stick up for you.
    Your boyfriend is such a scared ass that he's even afraid of tiny little kids. SO PATHETIC!!

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  • Faceless

    If your with me and you just got punched in the face, you just got punched in the face. Thats it. Ahhh, Kevin Hart is awesome.

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  • badmanalive

    Maybe you deserved it.

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