Is it normal to hate your mom as an adult?

I'm 20 and a sophomore in college. I never go home and she is the reason. It feels like she is taking out her "bad" childhood on me (we were both the oldest). All four of my aunts recall their childhood fondly, where my mom recounts a much worse story.
She takes anything I say and twists it so I'm "attacking" her in some way. She treats me like a failure compared to my sister, a rising junior in high school. Whenever I am home I have to keep to myself and limit my exposure or I start sinking back into depression from all her comments and put downs.
She home schooled me and my sister during middle school. She basically left me to myself and told me everything I did was wrong (and I didn't know how to do it right but she wouldn't tell me). She told me my sister who was four years younger than me was much smarter and I was worthless. She held me back in 9th grade and I dropped out until my dad had me go to a private school.
She took away my hope for escaping to college (which I thankfully made it to) and made me feel like an idiot when in reality I am a straight A student.
I told her I hated her my first time through ninth grade and I have never changed my opinion. I pretty much hate her the longer I see she will never change.

Side note she is aloud to preach at my church and will be doing so in two weeks. Knowing my preacher lets people speak without doing some sort of background check disgusts me. There should be some sort of standard.