Is it normal to hate who my best friend is becoming

78% Normal
9 Comments

to hate who my best friend is becoming ..is this normal?

She is selfish, fake, manipulative and self obsessed. However she's amazing to be around, shes happy, fun and has this amazing positive vibe. There's something about her eveyone loves, shes so popular, i love it when she treats me well its so much fun to be around her. But she is so concious of how she appears to other people she calls me and spends hours talking to me about guys analysing their every word, she is obssessed with what she wears, how she looks, she edits all photos of herself, but she tries so so hard to make it look like to other people she doesnt care at all and it works. When shes with people she is sociable, flirty and happy.

I usually see the horrible side of her and it seems like recently its only the horrible side. She is lovely to everyone else but because I'm allways there for her she doesn't need to make an effort or pretent with me. In some ways i am quite pleased I'm the only one of her friends she is real with. But I hate it. I am allways there for her, shes never there for me. I know all her problems, she uses me as her diary, which i dont mind, but I never tell her any of mine I never get the chance....she doesnt know so many things. Sometimes I love her so much and I think, i'm so glad we're so close. Everyone comments on how close we are and It feels like we were made to be together but when its really bad.

She has betrayed me so many times, and has flirted with countless guys. She makes me feel worthless, unconfident and she constantly knocks me down. I hate it when we're not talking so I end up forgiving her straight away, I want her to talk to me and not act like i dont exist.

Is it normal to hate your best friend so much at times?!

Voting Results
78% Normal
Based on 96 votes (75 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • suckonthis9
    12 years ago

    Ask her to read your post, and talk to her about it.

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  • weirdppl
    12 years ago

    I unload my insecurities on people all the time, they don't seem to mind, but I will most certainly stop if they told me they didn't want to hear any more

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  • mekzpop
    12 years ago

    Your friend sounds like my friend.

    Apart from she's not my friend anymore.

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  • SuperGreen
    12 years ago

    Your friend sounds just like my mom: fun, popular, and totally self-absorbed. It sounds like you could use a healthy dose of self-esteem; it would help you see that this isn't a very good friend for you. A real friend builds you up and shows you their appreciation of having you in their life by treating you with respect. No matter how fun she is, she's still bad for you and will continue to drag you down. Hang out with someone who appreciates you and you'll feel so much better! I had to cut my mom out of my life, and it's been easier ever since. Who needs to listen to all that drama!!

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  • kellstar79
    12 years ago

    I had a bestfriend like that too. I ended our friendship and have never been happier. That's toxic and you deserve better!

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  • remmy-poo
    12 years ago

    Sometimes it hurts to let go of someone you really love, but if it is hurting you it is ultimately your choice to do what you feel right.

    My best friend and I have a similar issue but we've been talking about it and although it seems it's only pushing us apart we can finally be at ease with each other and enjoy the company of each other even though it's nothing alike to the way it was before.

    I think you ought to try talking and expressing your feelings to your friend, make them listen to what you don't feel is okay. If they are really your friend, they'll understand and try to come to terms with you.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    You don't need to feed her insecurities by listening to all her nonsense. Be available - but no too much! Get your mom to call you off the phone after half an hour.

    She sounds like my mother who has moaned my whole life away!

    However, any relationship that does not make you equally as happy is abusive so do your best to replace her with some other friends. She will dump you eventually when she has no more use for you - so be prepared.

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  • doxies4life
    12 years ago

    I went through something similar only this friend of mine wasn't very popular, I was his only friend. My advise would be to end the friendship with her. I did that with the friend I talked about earlier and everything in my life got better including my luck with girls. It's not easy to end a friendship with someone of that personality. But like I said you'll be so much happier in the long run.

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  • cipher
    12 years ago

    I would like to be honest here. Do you really think you are best friends, meaning you'll have connected emotionally over the years, or do you just like to hang out with her because she is popular. I believe sometimes the popular people need a shoulder to cry on. They want to let out their hearts, but may find it hard to find who really cares for it. I would suggest to evaluate your friendship over the years to see if you ever had an emotional connection where both of you cared for eachother equally, the way best friends should. I know it is fun to hang out with fun personalities, but there is no reason to stick it out in such an exacting relationship. You will find someone else.

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