Is it normal to hate myself for being introverted?

78% Normal
7 Comments

Ever since early middle school I started losing a lot of self-confidence and became really reserved. I've regained a lot of confidence since I started college, but I still am extremely quiet and almost never meet people. It seems like everyone around me is always having so much fun running around with their friends on campus while I sit quietly with no friends waiting for my next class just so I can at least seem busy.

People always pretend that this is something easy to get over and that I'm an idiot for not being able to meet people. Whenever somebody hears about this problem they always tell me I need to force myself to talk to people. But, it isn't simple like that, my mind seems to just put a block on it, it feels like something out of my control. I can't go to a therapist because they always treat it the same way telling me that I need to force myself into it. The funny part is that I feel perfectly fine whenever somebody else comes and talks to me, and I have absolutely no problem doing things like presenting things in front of a class so I doubt I actually have something like social anxiety.

It starts to feel like my mind is just subconsciously trying to protect me from something that I don't consciously understand. This wouldn't be a problem, but I've moved away to college and all of my old friends are somewhere else. Now I'm stuck without friends and almost completely isolated. People tell me I should join clubs, but nothing ever comes from that because nobody ever wants to come talk to me. I've only had two girlfriends in my life and I only even got them through heavy support from my friends as well as a lot of advice.

Now I'm just completely on my own with nobody. Is this normal?

Voting Results
78% Normal
Based on 60 votes (47 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Hoohahohyahhh
    12 years ago

    I dont think you are introverted because introverts enjoy time alone, that's what gives them strength and energy so that they can think. You sound more shy to me, I'm like that too so don't worry. I spend a lot of time alone in college now but in high school I was always surrounded by friends. I don't think its normal to be with NOBODY, its unhealthy to be COMPLETELY alone. I know people probably tell you this a thousand times maybe but find people who share a common hobby with you. For me its sports because although I cannot conversate with people as much anymore, I still connect with them through means of teamwork in basketball at my local YMCA.

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    • JohnJillky
      7 years ago

      Exactly, I'm an introvert and I used to be confused about it before. Now I understand why I'm just not as interested as most in parties, constant conversation, etc. But I'm not very shy, bc when I meet new people I'm pretty talkative if I know what to talk about. But it gets tiring.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      I guess I left a bit out since I was mostly ranting about my isolation. I enjoy my alone time a lot, ideally I would want my balance to be around 65% alone and 35% with people. But when my alone time makes up nearly all of my free time, I start getting depressed and none of my time becomes enjoyable.

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      • thoughtfulopt28
        12 years ago

        im definetly like that too makes me feel more special than everyone elses personality but a serious person too

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  • AvrilLavigne
    9 years ago

    When you say you're an introvert, you must be happy spending time on being alone. In your case I must say you're kinda anti-social or you're just simply grumpy to fit in the crowd..

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  • water223
    12 years ago

    i'm glad i'm not the only one having the exact same problem.

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  • rin
    12 years ago

    I agree that it isn't as easy as they make it sound. What if you can't think of anything to say? I usually draw a completely blank when trying to talk to people. I have to be in the mood or I can't do it. How can you talk to people when you can't think straight right?

    Now that I think about it I hope I don't appear to be a bitch because I make one answer/short answer replies! I'm nice but I just can't converse when I'm not in the right mindset ^^ I'm an introvert (Love my alone time! :D) but just like Hoohahohyahhh (<lol nice name!) said it's unhealthy to be completely alone, we all need at least one friend.

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