Is it normal to get horny over math?

Math, that one subject everybody hates… that is—except for me. Math is my all time favorite subject.
Wait a minute! Did I just say subject? I actually, literally meant boyfriend.
You might be thinking, “did I hear that right?”
Yes you did. You sure did. The way stroking your man’s cock makes you horny is the same way I get horny when stroking my calculus book. The same way you are thrilled when your man cums inside of of you is the same way I get thrilled when I figure out a challenging math problem.
The dopamine rushes inside of me as I figure out interesting things about calculus on my own just like the dopamine rushes inside of you when the man you like accepts your proposal for dinner.
And for all you boy lovers out there, I’ve got news for you. Boys suck unless they want to sit down and do calculus with you. If sex is all they want, drop them like a constant when you’re differentiating. They ain’t worth shit. But if they’ll hit you up with calculus pick up lines, they’re a keeper.
I once had a boyfriend who couldn’t pass pre-algebra and he was a senior in high school. He just wanted sex and he’d molest me everyday. I didn’t know how horrible it was so I sit and let it happen.
He’s a constant. Differentiate. Drop him. Drop him out of the function.
So I get it. Most of you get horny over sex, but I’ve watched it before and—whoops, didn’t mean to tell you I watched porn, but there you have it. I thought it was disgusting. I don’t want it. Never did. Never will.
Think I’m out of luck though? NO! HELL NO! I’ve learned at a very young age how to masturbate without putting things in my vagina.
Guess who’s my dildo? If you guessed my math book, you’re correct. Calculus turns ON!