Is it normal to get "dumped" by friends?

Within the last few months at least 4 people who were my friends ended our friendship. And before that a few more. I am just wondering if this is normal? I am 23. They just delete me off of messaging services and cut off all contact :S (These are all people I know from real life) Is this maybe something age appropriate? The thing is, I can't ask them what I'm doing wrong since they dislike me too much to respond. One just said I am insane and two others started criticizing my actions before cutting contact. I have good hygiene, it must be something about my personality. It's tiring to have to keep looking for new friends.

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45% Normal
Based on 47 votes (21 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • Aww, that sucks. :(

    It's most likely a combination of: typical friendship pruning that many people go through around your age *and* you have a trait which is rubbing others the wrong way (this is normal).

    So, don't worry about this too much. :)

    Try to accurately view yourself from the same perspective as those ex-friends; they told you how they see you, now use it to your advantage. They may not have had accurate views of you, but don't discount what they say (negative or positive) entirely; you still might learn something from them. In the future, try to make friends with people who accept you as you are.

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  • who needs em, go out and get more! better ones!

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  • Sog

    I've dumped some friends - and been dumped by some too. I think it's quite normal for that to be happening at your age. Once you're out of school and working and have responsibilities, friendships take a different form from what you have in school.

    But yeah, not all friendships work out. And no friendship lasts forever. Whatever, there are plenty of people out there.

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    • Yes, I think I'm beginning to have to adapt to it. In school you were pretty much automatically friends with everyone, in high school there were no serious "enemies", just favorite people but pretty much everone got along with one another. And now I realize that you can't be friends with everyone because people are different (different priorities, interests, needs)...

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  • Paradiddle

    I'd say this is normal since people do this all the time. In your case, I want to say its normal but you've mentioned that this has happened a lot already. Based off of that, I want to say that there has got to be a legit reason as to why these people are put off like that even if you aren't really a bad person, just some personality trait that might be repelling things. It might do good to really think of anything it could be.

    Still, people who are so quick to delete without mentioning what the problem is first aren't worth having around anyway. They just did you a favor by showing their impatience.

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    • cuppycake1228

      This just happened to me. A coworker (a girl I've known for seriously 18 years) just removed me from her Facebook friends without any explanation. When I asked her why she did it, her only response was "It was my prerogative to do so." It not only pissed me off that she removed me, but that she didn't answer my question...then I realized she indirectly did. She hates me and it doesn't matter why. I feel better now that she's closed the book on our "friendship". Btw, she is 31 with the maturity level of a 17-year-old.

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  • Terence_the_viking

    their loss.

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  • cuppycake1228

    I'm sorry this has been happening to you. I can definitely relate. It's hard not to blame yourself and lie awake wondering what the hell you did wrong to deserve this, and why certain people think you're disposable. Sometimes the hardest part is getting past it without the satisfaction of an answer to that question. It's normal to feel upset. I hope things start looking up for you again soon, and they will. Best of luck to you!

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  • _Molotov_Cocktail_

    "If a friend dumps you, you should dump Molotov cocktails on him."
    -Russian proverb

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  • sickonine

    No, and you may go and tell them that you only wanted to use them to steal their girlfriends. Hahaha it is not normal, but hey, life can be like that sometimes. Just ignore it and go on with your life, find some friend/s who matters to you and whom you matter.

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  • vagman30

    An old high school class mate of mine once told me that "friends are full of surprises." Words can't describe just how right she was. One moment you meet someone whom you are practically inseparable with, then the next moment they act as if you don't exist. Believe me I've been in this situation and it's not fun. And the sad part is, they won't even tell me what I did or said wrong for them to leave. I mean if you got something to say, then say it to my face. The sad dark truth is you can't trust anybody these days. The world has become one f***ed up place where it seems it's every man/woman for himself/herself. Sad really.

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  • ScooterNyne

    I've been there. I actually dumped my best friend not too long ago. We were pals for years then things just got messed up between us and I cut off contact. Because of that a couple of his friends dumped me. It's hard but certainly not the end of the world. I made new friends already and am loving life again. it's just a phase. Though you sound like you have gone through it a lot which I'm sorry to hear.

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  • dirtybirdy

    Friends are like trees. They both fall down if you hit them repeatedly with an ax.

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    • Holzman67

      lol

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  • imadragon

    I've done that to someone, she was a manipulative, down-letting, criticizing bitch.

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  • handsignals

    I think you need to ask another question like IIN to kill my friends pets as a joke.

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