Is it normal to feel this pessimistic?

Oxford is right to say that to understand math is to understand everything, because math isn't religion, nor is it delusion, its science, its truth.
That's what I love about science. It shoots delusional optimism square in the face and reminds you that the little attachments you form ( the teacher who makes you laugh, the girl on the bus you're getting too attached to or the children you bare) or the negatives that hurt your feelings (gossip, black balling, liars and cheaters, crowds that reject or don't care about you) DON'T MEAN SH#T!!

We all know that this will all switch off when we die, that our beliefs mean nothing when poverty strikes, but we still want to believe in the optimistic delusions we create for ourselves. We go on keeping fingers crossed that we won't drown in it. Some of us fools might end up being right.

For those of us who aren't yet, this shit ends one of two ways, death (most likely) or salvation (0.0032% likelihood). If its death I'll face then I'll keep that f*#ker at bay, and enjoy my coding delusion for as long as I can. I'm not speeding up the trip to the end, even if it is close.

If I can't outrun it, I'll go to my grave having at least done what I loved the most, and felt that little bit of happiness.

The world I live in has nothing for me but that scientific/mathematic art form. Religion has nothing I want that I don't already have, my mother can barely save herself let alone save me (she's speeding up her trip to the end just like Dad did) the society I live in is just a sad simpleton joke, my kid brother is just that, a kid who can't process the horrors of the world we live in (at his age that's what happens), the romance/love concept is just the most underwhelming piece of gum of a lie I've ever witnessed and mankind as a whole, is going about whatever the hell they must to be human.

To be like Thanos would be heaven for me, he's an alien with the ability to lock away all emotion and program his logic to seek out his only desire (the power to control all existence) anything outside of that doesn't matter to him. But I'm not a marvel alien, and there's no way to be that way that I know off. So I have to put up with being human.
I hate being human.

I'm a teen and I wrote this for a school project today, is it normal to be this angry or am I just depressed.