Is it normal to feel insecure around your boyfriend of 8 months?

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10 Comments

I've been dating this guy for months. almost 8. I think so highly of him. He can literally do no wrong. I consider myself lucky to have someone so beautiful, so wonderful, and so awesome..

But I'll never be confident he feels the same way. Because I can NEVER be myself around him.

Me, I'm a bold, free-spirited, in your face, I don't give a f*** what you think kind of girl. But as SOON as I get near him, I change. I become a self conscious, nervous, awkward girl! AND I'M NOT ANY OF THOSE THINGS! My throat closes up. My tongue turns into rubber. I lose control of myself, i get so insecure.

But I am SO afraid of being myself. I'm afraid he'll hate who i really am. I'm usually fun and exciting and funny and charismatic, exactly like him.. but around him I feel I cannot for the life of me let loose. No matter what I do.

I think the world of him. I put him so high above me. And I get so unlike myself when I'm around him. But I love him. as;dlkfjal;sdkfjal;skdjf;alksdfj
GAHHHH this is the most frustrating thing in the world. All I want is to open the floodgates around him and be myself.

Is this normal? Is this unhealthy? Do I get like this because I'm so in awe of him? I'm afraid he's getting bored and I'm going to lose him for not being myself but I cannot open up and I'm scared it's too late to reverse this crap.

Voting Results
53% Normal
Based on 60 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • riiiiva
    13 years ago

    I think i'll just not give a damn anymore, and stop revolving my life around him and making myself so accessible.
    If it repels him and turns him off, whatever.

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  • abdul009
    13 years ago

    Stop making your self inferior to him.that some thing you should never do your as good as he is.if he sees the really you I bet he will appriate u more

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  • epitome_of_life
    13 years ago

    Laugh at fear and conquer it. Spend more time with him and ask each other more serious, personal questions. Eventually (if he's the right guy for you), you'll both know nearly everything there is to know about one another. That is when you'll no longer be fearful.

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  • Laylow
    13 years ago

    I lost a great girl before because I was so in love with her and behaved the way you are. I suggest you let the real you come out slowly over time until you are 100% you all the time. =].

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  • Elorria
    13 years ago

    Go somewhere exciting. Amusment park maybe, when your having fun and having that adrenaline rush from a rollercoaster, you'll really let loose. Worked for me except I was at a haunted house =P

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  • riiiiva
    13 years ago

    That's the thing Reptilia... i don't know!
    I think it's because I've put him on such a pedestal. I've convinced myself i have to be this person i'm not in order to keep him mine..

    it's really unhealthy.
    My only problem with all of this advice to "be myself" is.. i don't really know who the hell i am yet. I'm just a person!

    But i do know that i love to sing, yet i can't muster up the courage to let loose and belt out crazy songs around him.

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  • Reptilia
    13 years ago

    If you where really a " don't give a f " person why would you be having this problem. Jus relax n be. Don't even think about it, you maybe over analysing or trying to be something you are nor. Jus be how/who you were when you first met!

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  • aduusw
    13 years ago

    Just stop being afraid... Fear is never good.

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  • Fishy-Fishy
    13 years ago

    Maybe you jumped into relationship too soon? I (try to) make sure that I have atleast a month to get to know someone before I date them, no matter how amazing they are. I have them take me places just as bestfriends. It takes away alot of the "I'm your boyfriend, and you have to be perfect around me" pressure that guys put on their girlfriends. You have to get used to him. comfortable to be around him, no matter what.

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  • soccer2
    13 years ago

    U need to be able to be yourself around your significant other. He needs to see who u really are. Just slowly adjust yourself. The more u do then the more comfy u will be about it.

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