Is it normal to feel bad about this?

49% Normal
7 Comments

I work as a T.A. (Teaching Assistant) at a specialized school. Today, after class, one of my students was waiting to speak to the instructor who was busy dealing with another student. I was not doing anything during this. After waiting about 3 minutes, she asked her question and that was that.

Now what the hell was so bad about this that I'm still thinking about it 2 hours later and felt the need to post about it on here? Well, like I said, I was not doing anything, and was clearly free to speak to. Yet, she chose to stand there waiting for 3 minutes just so she could ask the instructor. And it was a fairly simple question that I could have answered easily. The reason I am dwelling on this is that, to me, this is an indication that she doesn't trust me. She would rather wait to speak to the instructor rather than ask me about it. And this indicates a failure on my part as a T.A. if, after 8 weeks of working together, my students still don't trust me enough to ask a simple question. (Keep in mind that I don't blame the student, it's my fault for not doing my job properly.)

I realize I am probably looking far too deep into this, but nevertheless, is it normal to feel bad about this situation?

Voting Results
49% Normal
Based on 55 votes (27 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • lc1988
    12 years ago

    I think it's more of an authority thing. Don't doubt your teaching abilities. At my college, the TA's teach the labs and the instructor is usually not there. At the rare occasion he or she would come in, all questions would turn to him and not the TA because the instructor just outranks the TA. Plain and simple. Another example, I work at a pharmacy and when the boss isn't there, I'll ask the other pharmacists questions but when the boss is there, I ask him to make sure I get it right. He's signing the paychecks after all and the instructor assigns the final grade.

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    • lc1988
      12 years ago

      Oh and I wanted to add that the fact that you're still thinking about it implies that you are an excellent TA.

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  • Ldizzy1234
    12 years ago

    I'm sure it was nothing like that. I think you're thinking too much into it. Don't lose sleep over it. :) Maybe next time, just say; "so and so, is there something I can help you with?" or something like that. I'm sure the child doesn't think you're incapable.

    A lot of times children run to the person they feel most comfortable with, especially in a school setting. Don't take it personally. Give it time. They'll probably warm up to you sooner than you think.

    And it could also be like a situation where they know who has more authority. Not that you don't matter, but kind of like how a child knows who their mother is from when they're a baby. The child will probably run crying to their mother first before they would run to a stranger or even baby sitter. Its really nothing to take to heart. You know when you were a teenager you probably ran to your friends to tell them everything instead of your parents? You probably told your friends, because you thought it was too weird to tell your own parents who you lived under the same roof as since birth. Well, as children, its the exact opposite. Its just that they go to who/what they know. And its kind of like a comfort for them.

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  • AtaPhen
    12 years ago

    Similar to another poster above, I'm fellow TA. To concur, I see this happen a lot. It's not because they don't 'trust' you or because they don't think you're intelligent enough to answer their question, but just because at the end of the day it's the professors say how things are graded. Plus, college students are ditzy. They, you, and me included sometimes do things for no fucking reason other than that it seemed obvious at the time.

    It is normal to be concerned about doing your job well, and to feel slighted if other's seem to put your competency in doubt.

    It is also really annoying when this 'mob the professor for the answers and ignore the THREE TAs in the lab' mentality results in the TAs (1) not being able to do their job, but (2) having to stick around late after lab was supposed to be over while the mob continues mobbing, and (3) potentially get blamed for not controlling the mob. Fucking intro chem...I bite my thumb at thee.

    What wouldn't be 'normal' would be to obsess for days, engage in self-destructive behavior over it, or to do something silly like stalk the student in question to discover if she really doubted you were a good TA. Thaaat would be weird, though entertaining.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      12 years ago

      Thanks for the post, but I must clear two things up:
      -The students that I deal with are much younger than college-level
      -They don't get graded at this school
      But nevertheless, I see what you lc1988 are saying.

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  • kittyg7113
    12 years ago

    Eh, I doubt it's anything you're doing wrong. Kids are shy and awkward. They also might be somewhat unclear about your position. Maybe next time, don't hesitate and just ask if he/she has a question you could answer. If you put forth confidence, they'll pick up on it.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    The kid's just being a suck up to the teacher - pretending to be interested in the subject to get a good report ;o)

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