Is it normal to fantasize about having an imaginary penis?

81% Normal

I'm a 26 year old female who has recently told a friend about a very dirty fantasy I have. It involves me having my way with two fictional characters that I am attracted to / have feelings for / am in love with. Kadaj and Yazoo from Final Fantasy (Advent Children). Anyhow, in the actual movie those two characters are obsessed with their mother and being re-united with her.

So I now have this fantasy of having a penis and fucking (for lack of better terms) Kadaj while he gives oral sex to his brother, Yazoo, and in is sandwiched between us as we both plow into him as he writhes and moans breathily and calls me "mother". I don't actually want to have a penis in real life nor do I want to become a male. I'm happy with my real gender and anatomy (and no, I'm not inter-sexed or transgendered, I'm a biological female).

After telling one of my online friends about it (who also happens to write dirty smut / slash fics about those two characters), she responded by telling me that I was both "hilarious and gross". She seemed quite alarmed by it, for someone who writes dirty slash / yaoi fiction and it made me feel disgusting and as though I am some sort of perverse creep. Now, I wouldn't normally ever impart my intimate fantasies to anyone (especially the really dirty and seemingly socially unacceptable ones like I have in the post) but something about internet anonymity offers me a sense of solace.

Was I out of line for mentioning that to my friend, even though she writes dirty / gay porn about those characters, herself? And am I complete pervert for having said fantasies?

To make matters worse, the friend in question mentioned that she was 17 and subtly emphasized her age which makes me feel even more guilty and disgusted with myself for sharing something so personal and so explicit with an underaged person. I also fear that she might now go and tell her friends / mutual friends / other random people on Tumblr what I told her about my fantasies or make it out that I'm some sort of pervert / pedophile. I have no feelings for her (not romantic, nor emotional, nor sexual nor anything else) but am just left feeling repulsed by myself, my fantasies, the fact that I shared those fantasies with someone and that that person, as it turns out, just so happened to be a 17 year old.

Any advice would help. Thank you in advance.

Voting Results

81% Normal

Based on 16 votes (13 yes)

Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!

[ Report Post ]

Comments ( 8 )

quentari

11 years ago

could be penis envy, and I don't know if it's normal, per se but I can relate.

I write dirty fics myself and sometimes fantasize that I'm one of the guys I'm writing about while they are having sex with the other guy/s, I think it's probably normal for fans of Yaoi because in the world we have created the vagina is less than useless.

As for the 17 year old, you didn't know until after you told her.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- Zonfire80
  
  5 years ago
  
  This is what a lot of transmen experience. We want a dick to penetrate a woman. We want this so badly, that we go out of our way to buy realistic looking dicks. It's so true.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
Millie_the_evil_saint

11 years ago

My opinion: I was disturbed after reading this. No, this is not normal in my book. Anime characters are not real life people. It is unnatural and not exactly normal to feel yourself so attracted to them. Then there's the incest dillemma...(that might still be okay, because as you say it's just a fantasy). But most people (who are not otakus) would react negatively to this. As about the girl...she's probably a virgin who thinks she's way more experienced than she actually is. You know, kids that age (teenagers), so overconfident and full of themselves. But when faced with the real stuff...(can't handle). I don't know if she'll run off and bad mouth on you. My guess is she won't (because then she'd also have to show her parents/guardians the smut fics she writes...). But anyhow, it depends on how you communicated with this friend of yours. She might think you are interested in her romantically... O_O Did you ever flirt with her?

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Anonymous Post Author
 
 11 years ago
 
 No. I never flirted with her or showed any interest in her. I've posted this months ago and have long since removed the girl from my Tumblr and put her on ignore. What bothered me is that I inferred from what she said that she may have misunderstood me or thought that I was wanting to engage her in erotic role play when I didn't. Prior to realizing her age, she invited me to role play with her so I responded by telling her "I guess it wouldn't hurt to try". We then started talking about how sexy the characters are and I, against my better judgement, told her one of my sexual fantasies about them. She then casually mentioned that she was 17 and started talking about age of consent laws where she is. I'm not sure where she was going with that or if she was implying that I was some sort of online predator but I just ended up removing her and blocking her instead.
 
 It's a pity, really. I would have liked to role play with like-minded adults. I now steer clear of role playing, period, because you never know how old the person on the other end might actually be.
 
 As for having an attraction to fictional characters, I personally find that it is a lot more common than people think. It's just not talked about often.
 
 Comment Hidden ( show )
 
 0
 
 0
 - Millie_the_evil_saint
 
 11 years ago
 
 That is a pity. But indeed, in that case it's probably best to do what you did. Still, it's not your fault if children are looking for porn on the internet and get traumatized by it. You can't be held responsible for that, because really -- how could you know her age?
 
 So if you enjoy roleplaying, go ahead and do it. You will find like minded adults. And if a few teens tend to slip in the way, there's nothing you can do about that. Teens are looking for that kind of stuff. They're hormonal. If anyone is to blame for any traumatic experiences they might get on the internet, it's their parents who gave them internet access before they were of legal age.
 
 As for the infatuation with fictional characters: true, and it even used to happen before the internet and movies even existed. Some characters in literature have intrigued people so much as to cause strong feelings. But still, I don't think such an infatuation is healthy. That's my personal opinion. It's okay to have it once in a while. But it's not good to cultivate it. Because it may lead to such a situation in which one finds him/herself not attracted to real people anymore... And I don't see how that can benefit people.
 
 Comment Hidden ( show )
 
 1
 
 1
 - Zonfire80
 
 5 years ago
 
 I'm a furry so you're way more normal than me. Seriously my first crush was Nala from the Lion King. I use to fantasize being Scar trying to marry Nala.
 
 About the incest thing, that's your business.
 
 Comment Hidden ( show )
 
 0
 
 0
cupcake_wants

11 years ago

Its called penis envy

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Zonfire80
  
  5 years ago
  
  Yep and unfortunately transmen have this problem.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0

Are You Normal?

Is it normal to fantasize about having an imaginary penis?