Is it normal to fall for a guy with a gf?

84% Normal
10 Comments

I was in an 8 year relationship that wasn't going to the next level because my bf wasnt ready to be with me like that. Getting tired of not being appreciated and loved I began talking to a coworker. I wasn't doing it to start anything but as you know it began to develop into something more than just flirting. He has a gf whom he says he is with out of duty. I broke up with my bf but he hasn't broken up with his gf. We talk everyday, spend time when we can. I accept that this may not go anywhere. I'm enjoying just feeling wanted after 8 years of not feeling it. He tells me he needs me and wants to be with me. Even talks as if us being together will happen not may happen. is it normal for me to even think this will go somewhere or should I continue to assume it won't? And yes I know I'm a cheating lying person and no good will come of this. But for the first time in years I feel special and I'm trying to savor it. Ty

Voting Results
84% Normal
Based on 55 votes (46 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 10 )
  • joybird
    12 years ago

    Maybe he's just hedging his bets and getting to know you better before he dumps her to be with you. It's a little cowardly but maybe he doesn't want to hurt her if you two are not destined to go anywhere.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • DannyKanes
    12 years ago

    You broke up with your boyfriend, that doesn't make you a liar or a cheater. All I can say is follow your heart and see where it leads you. :)

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • Ann96
    11 years ago

    Honestly I think he isn't going to leave her you are his second choice move on

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • ebonysky
    12 years ago

    I think I may have worded it wrong, I don't look for attached guys. They find me. I'm the case of my ex he just never wanted to marry me until he found out someone else was interested. But Ty for the advice. You guys gave me a lot to think about

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • theytookthisone
    12 years ago

    Well it is normal for you to feel that way because you put your heart into him, but it is not logical. He may just have you around when things arent going well with his other girl. Very rarely its going to end up good for you. Maybe down the line he'll leave her for you, but then the same situation could happen to you and some new girl he meets.

    He obviously loves her if he's still with her and won't move on with you. And I just read your last comment about guys not putting you first. You should maybe try going for more available guys. Sounds hard, and maybe you have a commitment issue if youre going for unavailable guys? Cuz I'm sure you know it already that it won't work out with those type of guys..which keeps you next to them. Hence fear of commitment.

    My suggestion is to distant yourself from him and either focus on yourself or find someone else to keep your mind off him. It just sounds like a messy situation and it doesnt look like it will work out for your favor in the end. Hope you find a solution to this issue and good luck

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • ebonysky
    12 years ago

    Ty guys I appreciate the honesty too. Every guy I've been with has never placed me first so I guess I keep drawing those types to me.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • chatter289
    12 years ago

    Honey, i wouldnt trust this guy. I mean, if he is doing this to his current gf with you, what makes you think he wont do this behind your back when you do get with him? karma comes back around.. he does not sound lik an honst guy in the slightest, if he had respect for his gf, even if he didnt love her he would not be doing this.... honestly, find someone who is honest and truthfull. Think of in in this light. And no you have not cheated at all... I strongly reccomend you start detaching yourself from him...

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • ebonysky
    12 years ago

    Ty! Everything you said I've thought of and I'm trying to just wait it out and be calm. But everyday I'm falling harder for him and I see myself falling in love. I'm afraid to tell him how I feel and yet I think he is holding back til I say something. This is just a mess

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Thisgirlthatboy
    12 years ago

    It is completely normal. It may not work out for the best tho because if you do have a future relationship with him you know he has a history of cheating (because he did with you) but there always is the possibility he could change just be careful and dont get to attached to him while he is still with her! Good luck :)

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    12 years ago

    Say I tell you I'm going to pay you $10 and hour for work. But when it comes to payday I tell you "wait a little bit longer."

    How many times will you wait for that paycheck before you realize I'm never going to pay you a single penny?

    THAT is what you get when you date someone who's cheating. You get promises and sweet words. But when it comes to keeping those promises you get excuses and resistance.

    The real question should perhaps be... what are you really getting out of your relationship with him if he keeps putting HER first?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    -1
    -1