Is it normal to fake most of my emotions

65% Normal
18 Comments

I realized recently that it seems like a lot of people have a different type of emotions than me. I've always been pretty emotionally flat and un-empathethic (like my dad). I always have to force a smile when someone tells me about something good that happened in their life or pretend to be sad when someone I know dies or gets injured. I feel angry and sorta happy, but that's about it. I feel nothing for others. Is this normal or is there something wrong with me?

Voting Results
65% Normal
Based on 63 votes (41 yes)
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Comments ( 18 )
  • dappled
    11 years ago

    The more I think about this, the more I think most people do it. Or at least overemphasise the emotions they do have. For instance if someone at work (that I don't know well) has had a baby, I'm pleased because it makes them happy, but I'm pleased if they get a free chocolate bar from the vending machine. I'm not thrilled, overjoyed, swallowed by boundless delight, or all the other things people write in the greetings card. Most of what people do is fake or overblown, maybe because it has to be.

    Actually, I'm going to disagree with myself. I don't think it has to be. I think we're all dramatic, ridiculous, exaggerated, soap opera versions of what we really are.

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    • bananaface
      11 years ago

      Really? Sometimes I feel like I play down my emotions just to try and not look overly enthusiastic and crazy. I usually fail, though. Maybe I actually am dramatic and ridiculous! Maybe I should get in touch with Eastenders or something:O!

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      • dappled
        11 years ago

        I downplay and understate too but so many people misunderstand it as a lack of enthusiasm or torpor or, worse, a negative judgement that I then feel I have to "play the game". In everyday life I hear myself saying the words, "That's amazing" and I cringe inside because the thing is never amazing. :/

        You know, like, little Billy scored three goals in the under 9's football match. It's not amazing. He's a striker and he's playing against nine year olds. If, on his own, he outplayed the fully-grown Brazilian national team, that'd be amazing.

        Hmm, spot the grumpy hungover man posting on IIN. :P

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        • bananaface
          11 years ago

          Haha, aww, you don't seem grumpy. I see what you mean now, though. It's always the worst when people say something and you have no option other than to fake emotions otherwise they'll go all moody and get offended. Like when people say something really boring yet finish with "interesting, isn't it?". Um, no, it's not even remotely interesting.:/ Oops...I mean yes! Fascinating stuff! I wish my kettle did that:O! Very interesting.

          And then when they do actually say something interesting you end up reacting the exact same way you would to all that trivial crap they come out with. Or maybe that's just me:P.

          Hmm, maybe I'm a bit grumpy too.:P Except I'm always like this and I can't blame alcohol:O! Yikes.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I have to do this at work and it drains me. I can't walk around with a blank expression on my face or I'd get in trouble. Plus I don't want a customer to have a bad experience because of me. I usually fake enthusiasm then when I turn around and no one is looking my face goes back to not giving a shit.

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    • [Old Memory]
      11 years ago

      is that your resting face in your profile pic? cause you look a bit bored

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        That's my I'm not peeing in the same water you're swimming in face, they are very similar.

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        • [Old Memory]
          11 years ago

          hahaha , naughty capy

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  • Silverloin
    11 years ago

    Its normal if ur talking to a really fucking boring guy and he/she cracks a joke and u pretend to laugh is normal

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  • charli.m
    11 years ago

    If it's a person I don't have an emotional investment in, then I don't really hve all that much of an interest other than the basic "It's good tht another person is happy/bad that they are sad" which I think is normal. Only it's not sociqlly acceptable to admit this so we fake it.

    When I am genuinely showing an emotion, I feel like it will appear strained 50% of the time because I was raised to repress everything.

    To be honest, I'm surprised no one has yet told you you have an autism spectrum disorder, this site being so big on throwing out diagnoses left right and centre.

    In case it wasn't clear, I don't think you're autistic. I voted normal.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I am almost exactly the same way, for just about everything. I do tend to get angry at stupid things, things I feel are almost ridiculous to have had gone wrong. But other then that I am pretty emotionally flat as well. I find I have to remind myself to ask how someone is doing when I see them, and if they have a kid/grandkid I 50% of the time remember to ask how the kid is.

    And I also dont see the big deal about kids, whats the need for running over to them, picking them up, going nuts over them?

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    • charli.m
      11 years ago

      Cos they're cute n squishy like puppies :P

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        I dont know what it is, for a dog I could run over to them to say hello, but with a kid its just like "oh wow a kid" like "oh wow that car has tires on it"

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        • charli.m
          11 years ago

          Haha, I know. Meh. Different people, different views.

          I was just comparing it to something I thought you'd relate to :)

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  • XxSe7enxX
    11 years ago

    I feel the exact way. I just can't help it but pretend that I care or else theyll start bitching and saying that it's not funny.

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  • unicornsprinkles
    11 years ago

    Ok I feel a lot better now! I think it really comes down to us having to do what society expects us to like you guys said. I feel like everyone will think I have issues if I don't fake or dramatize my emotions.

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  • NothingxCrazy
    11 years ago

    I got told that part of the reason why I didn't deserve a promotion because I wasn't enthusiastic enough about it or I just didn't emotionally reflect my want for it. I'm a bit too serious at work sometimes and I think that's my problem. I try not to let my emotions effect my job (though my job requires emotions since I work with people).

    I don't fake emotions, I just don't show the ones I do feel, around people. Though, I am an overly emotional person in general (I'm a chick.. surprise!).

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  • Cuntsiclestick
    11 years ago

    I was actually about to make a post to ask this question. It's good to see that it's normal.

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