Is it normal to dream about your first love from 20 years ago?

I am nely i am 35 almost 35 i am married i have tree wonderfull beautiful kids .We don't have a love marriage but it is okay.About a year ago I found my first teenage love via FB actually he found me and wrote me i have been always faitfull to my husband and never did such a thing but this time i was just so stupid to accept his frindship in FB and than my nightmare began i was again like a teenager in love we haven't seen eachother for 20 years now and the only thing we share wa a few kiss he was 18 i was 14 and our break up was a drama cause we are muslims and he is a family of my mom so when mom found it out was mad at me and i was wondering all the time how it could be if we had the chance now from last year october i still remember the day until now we are talking i was almost divorced casue it was getting stronger day by day i was getting crazy i could't stand it when i was in bed with my own hasband i thought it was not fair to my love who is also married and has tow kids we both live in tow different countries but still it feels like he is underneath my cloths he is so close to my heart our songs our memories of the past how young and in love we were and that kiss never would go a way but i am a honest woman and i don't want to regret someday cause we both know it pretty good that there is just no chance at all to be some how together we are family his father is my mom's uncle and he is also my hasband's family so it is all so complecated and diffecult .Now he wants to break up with me he wants me not to call him anymore cause he says he cares too much about me and i am not just a girl he wants to have good time with ,i am also agreed with him it will take us both no where and i am so very afraid of my hasband and Allah but that crazy heart doesn't litsen to me it drives me crazy I was looking for help and I found this site if there is somebody who knows how i feel please write to me .Cause My life is not bad My hasband is a doctor he is handsome careing and loves me please help me get over that dream which will never come treu please .And i am really sorry for the bad english I speak dutch so it is so diffrent I wait for your reaction cause i am going trogh a hill my health is getting worse please help me .I do know I just have to go on with my life but how ,what should i do to make this pain les and forget my dreams which will never ever come true .