Is it normal to develop narcisism after being alone so long?

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16 Comments

I know this post resonates with a previous post, but I absolutely LOVE being alone. I love coming home and relaxing (no screaming kids to take care of, no husband and emotional baggage to stress over) I have accepted that im too eccentric for any friends at my age (im 24).

But I have grown to love myself so much, too much to the point that im suspecting I might be a narcissist. As a female, I love taking care of my hygiene. I use top notch body, skin, hair, and nail products to maintain my physical appearance. I go to the gym daily. I love beauty products, all of them. At my work while other girls my age come to work sleep deprived with a bedraggled appearance (due to stress from kids, husbands...etc) I come in presentable ALWAYS. always looking and smelling good. Am I a vain person? These girls stare at me, i can feel it when i walk by with my head up, shoulders back. I look at myself in the mirrors when i walk past any, and notice any "ugly" discrepancies (if my hair is messed up...etc)

Furthermore, I talk to myself constantly. In my mind, im always encouraging myself to do positive things. Stay focused in school, destroy anything negative that threatens my path...etc The instant anyone or anything threatens my self esteem, I immediately lash out at the source. I love myself that much. I find there to be a serene, almost magical aura when im alone. and i love my solitude. Its like im my own best friend.

To reiterate my question, and this is mostly for introverted persons or solitary individuals, have any one of you developed an inner love for yourself? If after spending so much time alone, do you turn to yourself and develop narcissist tendencies?

Please share your stories:) Thanks

Voting Results
70% Normal
Based on 27 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    I don't think that sounds narcissistic. It sounds like you have a much more healthy mind state than most people. It's good to think highly of yourself. Too many people wallow in their own shit.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Thank you. I needed an "outsiders" opinion. Mostly though this resonates with female tendencies. When I say i am "narcissist" I mean I indulge in taking care of myself physically and appearance wise.

      This might be due to being single/no kids. I remember a co worker bitterly told me "Well you dont have to worry about anything you dont have kids/a family, I have four kids to take care of, you dont". No one forced her to spawn kids. I find alot of people who are married with kids to be very negative and stressed out...etc

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      • [Old Memory]
        10 years ago

        Yeah "bugsforbreakfast" is on the right track.

        A narcissist needs narcissistic supply, they could best be likened to an "emotional vampire". They need people around them all the time to create it, close people who they can control. They are almost always in relationships (often multiple ones at the same time) and often get married for a constant source of narcissistic supply.

        Your being alone likely excludes you.

        There is a great example in a book I read that says;

        "A narcissist and a psychopath are stuck on a desert island. They are both very similar disorders (narcissism actually being the core component of psychopathy) in reality. So what happens? The psychopath thrives, not needing people at all to survive due to being anti-social. The narcissist dwindles and dies, his/her source of narcissist supply cut off without plenty of people to drain it from."

        A vampire with no blood to drink.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          10 years ago

          which book was this?

          a self sustaining vampire is feasible for me

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          • [Old Memory]
            10 years ago

            A self sustaining vampire isn't feasible according to the very definition of vampirism lol.

            The guy who wrote it is a narcissist, it's quite popular and well written. He has read the whole thing in sections on youtube, just search "Sam Vaknin".

            He covers everything, from relationships to the strongly debated argument over whether or not narcissists are "evil".

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      • [Old Memory]
        10 years ago

        I agree with all that. I hate when someone says it's selfish to not want to start a family when they have 8 kids on welfare with different moms and dads and say they want more kids so somebody will love them.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          10 years ago

          now that i think about it. I once had the observation and the thought that persons who have kids are incredibly selfish. its such a selfish act. They just want to "make" something that looks like them, and i notice alot of parents say "thats my boy, just like daddy...or thats my girls just like mommy" when referring to themselves

          thats a really good point you brought up there which makes me question the narcissism in "filling the void in one's life" by simply having a family/kids. Its all for selfish reasons it seems

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  • GinnyWeasley
    10 years ago

    I dont know if its the same but i am a very lonely person and hate everything about myself and at the same time i think i am better than everybody else. Does that make any sense?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      um no I dont think i can relate TO THAT. My obsession is i know that sounds conceited but its love for me:)

      I can try to see what you mean though. Do you mean you are physically an ugly ducky:( and hate your physique or demeanor but on the inside you are a creative super smart genius who cant correlate intellectualy with the "sheeple" or the common simpletons?

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  • RoseIsabella
    10 years ago

    I would have loved to have been like you when I was your age. I tried my best but let a lot of bullshit get in my way. When I was younger I got accused of being a narcissist but I've actually got other issues.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Hi! I know i shouldnt but would you mind if i ask you for your age?

      Though I've always been a natural introvert, i sort of "awoke" and became enlightened at around 20 years old. Prior to that (my teenage years) I wasnt even aware of my beauty or my "inner voice"

      I can assure you im not crazy lol but there is a voice inside that pushes and drives me, self sustaining

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      • RoseIsabella
        10 years ago

        I'm 43 years old.

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  • shuggy-chan
    10 years ago

    I vote narcissistic, just read ur post out loud. It even written in a negative to others, superior attitude. All the things u do aren't necessary narcissistic, in the degree u discribe them, your doing them on a narcissist level. It good to take pride in urself, work, apperance,. But lashing out at other and putting down other and comparing urself and other constantly is.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      really? but i dont necessarily think less of people i just juxtapose them next to me, well, because its what im exposed to

      i read my post out loud. twice. i cant see it. but idk, i did ask the question, eh?

      im not a bad person though im relatively calm and mellow around people and smile at them

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