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I was a virgin and I slept with this guy. I thought he would realize how much he loves me and would want to be my boyfriend. since then, he stopped talking to me. I let him do anything he wanted to me. Afterwards, I felt dirty and used. Is it normal that i still love him?
They should teach this stuff at school. They really should.
P.S. I realise you're in this position right now, and I have a huge amount of sympathy. But it's not the way the world works. Find someone to give you a hug (because I'm damn sure you're in need of one) and take this as a lesson in life. Men don't think the same way women do. For any young men out there, the reverse is also true.
But to the OP, take care of yourself, take this as a lesson, and know that we've all been there. It's a rite of passage to find that things aren't exactly what we thought they were. Good luck for the future. You seem a nice person. I'm sure you'll find someone who deserves you.
Women do the same thing to men, you just don't hear guys crying about it. Stop the qq and learn from mistakes so it doesn't happen again. Simple as that.
I love women who hold grudges and stereotype ALL men as scum and pigs as if it's only one way around!
But very bad thing that happened to you! Unfortunately you met a bad PERSON! Just learn from this experience and move on.
I didn't see one woman here say all men were pigs and scum. One person said they were wired differently and I said "this guy at least".
You must be lost.
I find these comments on how men are so different from women because they don't equate sex with love to be insulting to both men and women. Most PEOPLE don't, or rather shouldn't, equate sex with love.
It just sounds as if men were only out to get sex while women were vulnerable and emotional and fell in love immediately with anyone willing to give them some comfort. I also find it terrible that most women seem to foster this belief.
Nevertheless, a terrible thing happened to you. But this is one of the experiences one makes in their youth. Make sure that you learned something and speak to a friend about it. I'm sure they will give you better advice and support then a website.
This is a tough lesson you've learned. Sex does not and will NEVER make a guy fall in love with you. Guys are wired very differently than girls. Next time make the guy work for it and be your boyfriend BEFORE you give up the goods. I'm sorry to tell you this but you were used. He got what he wanted from you and now has no use for you. Its a cold world out there and it's time you learned the truth. Most guys are pigs and girls need to be very careful.
ya, you lost your v-card to him. pretty much everyone still hold a place in their heart for their 'first love'... but leave him be and go on, it sounds like he played you quite well. some boys only want virgins. its like a notch in their belt, and something to compare with friends. just dont start sleeping with everyone, that would classify you as a slut.
Yeah that's normal to believe. I'm a guy and I think if I had sex with a girl, I would probably fall in love with her. In fact, I cannot imagine it not having such an effect. You probably just fell for the wrong kind of guy. Of course you should be more cautious next time, but still remember that not all guys are the same.
Had sort of the same thing happen to me back in high school. Let the guy sleep with me, then he was all distant and everything just like your guy.
Ran into him a couple of years ago and we talked about it as adults. It turns out he was so overwhelmed by guilt over what he thought was taking advantage of me that he couldn't deal with it and shut down with me.
Your guy probably is an asshole and a jerk. But at the same time he might be an insecure, often frightened individual also.
Just a thought.
girl, he only wanted to have sex with you. i totally understand where you're coming from. let someone else love you. This guy is a selfish bastard that doesn't deserve your love and attention. You're going to feel shitty if you try to win his attention... he's never going to give you want you want.. because he's a douchebag.
it's normal to develop this attachment since he was your first. hey, i've experience this. it's taken about almost 2 years to get over my first.
distract yourself. don't let some stupid guy treat you like shit and disrespect you. love yourself.
Guys act that way alot me too I am a guy and should know after I have sex with my girl sometimes I feel that I have to let her go, but then I realize that is wrong. So yeah I treat her better than before and let her know that she is important to me.
Learn from that mistake and next time don't give it until u make sure that man is yours. Don't give him anything till he makes you officially his girl friend. Make sure you know his parents and friends so that he would think it twice bfore he leaves you.
I think it's totally normal for you to FEEL as though you still love him, but just because it's normal doesn't make it right. I'm not going to get all judgemental on you, saying that you're dumb or that you should have saved your virginity for someone special, because I think the majority of people have regrets about their first time, I know I kind of do ;)
Just really move on from this dude
There is a saying going around 'Sleeping with him won't make him love you, and having his child won't make him stay'. As a man this pisses me off, but as a realist i have to say it's truth. Men will say anything (and i do mean anything) to get what we want. Even if i were to tell you i've never lied about how i felt to a woman (i'd have to have one first) you'd still think i'm lying and thats ok. It sucks, but its ok. I hate that you fell into this trap, but be strong and learn from it.
I find these comments on how men are so different from women because they don't equate sex with love to be insulting to both men and women. Most PEOPLE don't, or rather shouldn't, equate sex with love.
It just sounds as if men were only out to get sex while women were vulnerable and emotional and fell in love immediately with anyone willing to give them some comfort. I also find it terrible that most women seem to foster this belief.
Nevertheless, a terrible thing happened to you. But this is one of the experiences one makes in their youth. Make sure that you learned something and speak to a friend about it. I'm sure they will give you better advice then a website.
One to many girls are in the same place as you. Believe me, I've been there. But never just assume because you sleep with a guy, he's going to love you. That was a stupid assumption on your part. It's always so hard to get over the first one and I'm still not over mine even though I had almost the same situation. I'd be a hypocrite if I told you it was weird to love him but you need to move on and find someone to treat you right.
say no to sex and be lonely, you give your love to freely and its not precious to you yet, boys have needs and you have needs and they will meet at some point. youll love that
C if men were smart they would keep fucking them instead of just once them dumpin them. Why just use them once? I don't get it men!
He probably did have feelings for you but the sex wasnt that great and so he felt the basic chemistry wasnt there so why pursue it....you on the other hand have not had enough experience to know real chemistry so you think this is love....trust me your gonna find a guy that curls your toes and you'll forget all about this guy...
It's normal to believe that, but it isn't true. I also thought this.. and I was truly in love. And even months later, I'm still in love with him while he plays games. I've realized I deserve better.. and I deserve someone willing to give me their all.
Don't do it. You'll regret it.
It's not always the case.
Sadly, yes, it's normal to think that if you have sex with him, he'll love you (this is usually not the case, however, just like some girls think that having a baby will make a man stay).
However, I'm sorry to hear that he left. My first was an arrogant douche bag who I gave everything to, and in turn, he cheated on me with my cousin. I still loved him after a while, but moved on. I found it hard to date at first because I felt dirty and tainted, but it'll pass.
If I were you I would lube up the old hiney and try it again, you know you liked it thats why you want him back. Every guy loves a girl who puts out,especially one that lets him do anything, at least until he finishes
Ouchhh. :/ And your lost your virginity to that scum?? Men disgust me...this guy at least.