Is it normal to be unhappily married and search for..??

I think you and your husband need a vacation! See if you parents will look after your children for a few days whilst you go away to find what you've clearly lost. Sometimes these mini-vacations can help to find the spark that attracted you to your husband in the first place.
Goodluck.

Things to think about:
Why did you get together in the first place?
Why did you plan to have children? (Don't tell me they were an 'accident', not 3 of them).
What is it about your husband that made you want to marry him in the first place?

If you have positive and happy answers for these questions, then think about how to save this marriage. People should never stay together for the children though, everyone ends up unhappy and resentful like that.

@tylee, how you know HE is the bad influence or even if anyone is?

I don't know what is worse for kids - parents together and fighting or parents separated. Both are tough for kids. Maybe better to sort things out. Take some time out - go stay with your family for a while to cool off.

You need to get a divorce. I'm in a bit of a bad situation too. I have no kids but I've been in a relationship with this guy for 7 years and I truly regret not leaving when I had the chance so i know how you feel. You have kids and that means that you have to leave him. He is just going to be a bad influence on them and you don't want them around all that fighting! For their sake leave!!!!

unfortunately it is normal - I have heard this story a million times. I even heard this woman say that her and her husband have already decided to divorce as soon as the last kid moves out - it was a mutaul decision. Well they did it and well was it worth it, waiting for 6 years............
I say life is far to short to stay in a relationship that isnt working.
Take it from a 25 year old that has had divorced parents since I was 6 - I have not developed an unhealthy attitude towards relationships - I was much happier after they divorced.
I understand that your kids are everything, and that is awesome, but you arent doing them any favors - they are going to think that that sort of relationship is the norm - and thats what they will seek out.
I mean, you want to be happy too right.
Its hard intitially, but once everything falls into the place you wnat it you will be so glad!
Best of luck -

do it ;)

Not normal or a good situation for anyone! Seek some good couples consuling and give it a chance, or make plans to move on! Good luck with your choices'

Do it

Maybe for a month u do the things your partner would like to do and see how it ends up

I've heard of couples that are unhappy but end up staying together only for the sake of their children. MY PARENTS FOR AN EXAMPLE. But I say why should you be punished to stay with a man just because he fathered your children? Over time your kids will be better off. Arguing and fughting in front of children can emotionally damage your kids im sure you already knew that. Children can sense when parents are unhappy and the stress and anxiety that the parents feel. You and your husband need to seek professional help FOR THE BOTH OF YOU do it for your kids and try to be happy again. If not you need to be strong for your kids and do what is best for them because children are a blessing! Im a mother 6 myself and another on its way NEXT MONTH :)

Why did you marry him and commence procreating if you aren't happy? Christ almighty it's not difficult to determine the best course of action here. You shouldn't have taken either step to begin with gees...use your brain for crying out loud.

How could you be unhappily married for 6 years and then bring two more children into the world? Or are you one of those fools who think that kids will bring you together - WRONG!!! Nothing causes more tension in a marriage than kids, and if you stop having babies you should find that as they get older your relationship will get better - especially if you both get a full night's sleep!

I'm really unsure of what you actually mean - because on one hand you say you're staying coz of the kids BUT you don't want to be alone?! You've 3 kids to raise!! So I assume you want another man to cling to / support you - suggesting you are very weak. Find the happiness you seek in yourself and your kids, and forget about other men. It's a rare man that will love your kids as much as you do, so that will bring another set of problems. Wait until they grow up a bit before you go looking for more trouble.

To be honest, if I were you I would work on these arguments - only debate the issue, and never resort to insulting the other person. Realise that you two are making these kids extremely unhappy!

The fighting is not normal at all, although it is common but I've been married 22 years and can count on one hand the number of arguments we have had. However, it is normal to stay together for the sake of the kids, though most women would do a better job of keeping the arguments to a minimum. It takes two to argue / fight!

Unfortunately this is normal. Bit normal doesn't mean happy. Speak it over, dedicate some time to making it work, and if it doesn't then you're probably going to remain unhappy for quite a while.

The two of you aren't invested in each other. You're invested in keeping your relationship intact and the things you've built together (the house, the appearance of a nuclear family, fiscal stability for the kids). I take it you are both working in some capacity (it is a global recession, after all), both stressing about bills, education for your kids, food, gas, wasteful spending, and a million other things.

Whatever it was that pulled you two together in the first place, that's the thing that will resolve this issue. You both need to sit down and have a frank discussion (a long one, possibly several day's worth) about what you miss about each other. Then, the both of you try to find it together. If those things can't be found, you know to either build a new foundation with your partner, or wipe the slate clean and walk away.

I don't think its normal, I'd try to fix it before I just up and left though.