Is it normal to be uncomfortable near drunk/ high people?

87% Normal
6 Comments

So a little background, my dad was an alcoholic and is super creepy when drunk. Like won't get out of your personal space, always has to be awkwardly grabbing your shoulder, flirting with girls who are like 20 (he's 60), occasionally slapping me in front of people when I try tell him to lay off, and never shutting the fuck up drunk. And I experienced this throughout most my childhood. Well eventually he got into drugs and while I never saw him while high, I did see the effects on him and that enough made me uncomfortable as hell.
I'm now in my early 20s and most my friends are either drinking or smoking weed and while they try to get me to come to parties with them or just try getting high once, I can't do it. I don't wanna be around anyone who's under any influence. I try not to be a killjoy but being around them when they're going out to smoke makes me extremely uncomfortable to the point where I get tempted to call my mother so she can get me away from it (yeah, I know, embarrassing. It's never happened but I fear one day it will) since I can't drive.
I know this is probably really weird but another part of it is that I fear someone will try to sexually assault me when I'm around drunk or high people. Not sure why. I may have a few repressed memories or something since I do have a history of mental health issues but this has been a huge fear of mine since high school and I have no idea where it came from.
I guess all I want to know is if this is normal or if there's at least anyone else out there who feels the same way since I feel really alone with this. Like can you at least see where I'm coming from here?
Edit: Oh, I forgot to mention an important detail. The drugs and alcohol are pretty much 90% of the reason my parents divorced too which was kinda a major cause of the whole mental illness thing.

Voting Results
87% Normal
Based on 54 votes (47 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    This is 100% normal given your experience with your father.

    You'd probably benefit from contact with others with similar issues: check out if you can access an Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA) group for some support.

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  • RoseIsabella
    8 years ago

    Why can't you drive, dear? On the bright side your dad's liver is probably fucked. People like him make me a staunch non organ donor.
    :-)

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  • rightkindofpasta
    8 years ago

    It's completely normal given your background, but honestly you have nothing to fear. Have you told your friends how you feel? If you really don't want to hang with them while they're doing that, don't. If you would like to, however, just know that it most likely won't be anything like what you experienced with your father. Although some people can get really f'd up when drunk and do things that may seem out of character, your father's reaction isn't the norm. Know that you can always call your mom if you feel you need to, and if your friends are really your friends, then they'll still be your friends afterward. Same for if you choose not to go at all.

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  • laurenmmb
    8 years ago

    It is normal. You've obviously gone through some touch shit and its effected you. Maybe go talk to someone about it? Like a psychologist or try find groups that done drinks and do drugs for fun. Sorry you have to deal with all this tho

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  • Motorhippy
    8 years ago

    You should consider trying both to see what consumed your father is typically harmless, maybe you could get an understanding of how helpless he must be to rely on something so trivial.

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  • [Old Memory]
    8 years ago

    It depends on who is getting intoxicated. Everyone reacts differently. Some people are terrible to be around when they are getting fucked up while other people handle it just fine. People who get drunk and act like a dumbass shouldnt drink in the first place.

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