Is it normal to be this obsessed over a girl?

Didn't read. Yes, like all the stories like this we get all day on this site.

TL;DR.. well i read a bit. Seems like you got it all under control.

Bro... what is your damn problem? I mean you want to murder her boyfriend because he's better than you? And you were bragging that you could get tons of ass but don't want it because "your" ass is getting fucked by some dude who's light years better than you and who doesn't cry to some people on the Internet about some guy who is fucking "his girl" like she is somehow entitled to him because he likes her, I mean I have never met someone so full of themselves, I just can't even explain it, you're a fucking joke man.

I actually read all that. Yay me and yay you. You figured it out yourself all by you lil ol self. Like just now i was gonna ask for the love of fuck what does TL;DR mean!?!? Cus its in that comment there, buuut it just registered after seeing it a million times.

Derpybirdy.

Seems like you're in love with yourself

I have a couple of questions/comments and then advice based on your post, but namely this part:

"And because we get along so well (and like I said earlier, as I was very direct with her sexually - there was no confusion on either part that we're just friends) I was fairly confident that she's going to leave her current boyfriend. So one night I told her that I have feelings for her (not just sexing her, but you know..love), asking her to leave her boyfriend and to be with me."

So you loved your female friend who you knew from the start already had a boyfriend. You clicked like with no one else before.

First of all, sounds to me like the fact that she had a boyfriend already made you up your game, if anything. She told you she has a boyfriend from the start, and you took it as a challenge, wanting to "win", and communicating with her often, seeing her through rose-colored glasses as a prize that, if meant to be, would realize you were their soul mate and like a fairytale, would leave the committed relationship she was in for you.

Thank goodness she turned you down (and you will think the same in the long run if you don't already), because if she hadn't, why would you think, if she did that, the same thing wouldn't happen to you when the next smooth-talker came along who gave her more attention? Sorry, it's possible you had a fantastically clicking relationship, but some of that may have been based on your pedestal/prize perception of her, her enjoyment of the attention/competition, and the non-threat of a real relationship since she was already in one. Even if it wasn't (and these are a lot of benefits-of-the-doubt), and you got along that fantastically, if it were that real, she would have left her boyfriend to concentrate on her relationship with you, her "true soulmate". Girls are sucker romantics. The fact that she stayed with him (despite whatever "circumstances" may have existed to "make" her not be able to leave or whatever) and was still with him when you made your move means YOU DID NOT HAVE A CHANCE AND NEVER DID IN HER EYES. It's harsh, but true. She may not have meant to be a heartbreaking b*tch, but sometimes when girls are young and confused, it ends up happening.

It sounds like she wasn't 100% faithful, although maybe that was accepted in the relationship parameters she had with her bf to flirt with, talk in depth with/share deep feelings with other men (which is what many people including myself consider emotional infidelity, because if she wasn't sharing this way with her bf but was with you, that's robbing him of the entirety of her, but I digress). From what else you were saying about being "very direct with her sexually" and mentioning sex several times, and that you like "touching" her, I assume (though I don't like assuming, can't help but think) *maybe*, though I don't know, but *maybe*...that means you were possibly sexting and/or Skype sexing or something like that (which I and even more people would consider cheating), making frequent references to sex, dirty talk, heavy flirtation, and/or at the very least being very sexually aggressive, which was disrespectful on your part and on hers for continuing to participate or allow it. You eventually were lulled into a false sexual relationship whether you "did" anything even sexually suggestive or not, and became close enough to her that you believed there was a good chance she would leave her boyfriend for you.

You're leaving out a lot of details, but from what you said here, it really reminds me a lot of a friend who had developed a very similar relationship with a girl he met online (but never IRL) who lived with her older boyfriend who supported her. He & she had a total fantasy relationship to the point where he bought her a plane ticket (she was from another country) and basically proposed for her to leave her "cruel, gilded cage life" to run away and live with him happily ever after. That was a pretty huge expectation, and I don't think he really thought it through from her POV in practical terms. But being an emotional vampire user, like your "friend", as well as a gold-digging actress-princess who never took the relationship seriously, that's when things got too "real" for her and she said no. He was really very emotionally crushed, and he ended their "relationship", which surprised her at the time. All of this happened before we met. I wondered how he could have let himself be swept up so far in this complete online soap opera fantasy. I'm pretty sure it would not have gone so far and he wouldn't have been so hurt if she didn't have a boyfriend. This gave her a false aura of being more desirable and it brought out the primitive competitive nature of the males pursuing her, because I never even met her and I know he wasn't the only one.

Go for someone who is AVAILABLE. Any girl who flirts and allows you to aggressively pursue her after she tells you she has a boyfriend is someone you 1.) don't want as a girlfriend anyway, 2.) is an attention whore with low self-esteem, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, 3.) playing mind games with you to boost her own sorry ego. Let her be with her boyfriend, whom I feel very sorry for, and play mind game fantasy semi-IRL roleplaying with someone else. You sound like a grown up who deserves much better. Go experience real life, things you enjoy, getting to know yourself. Once you learn to love yourself more (which it sounds like you've started to do, and good on you for it) the right fantastic, real, genuine, perfect woman will come to you and make you forget all about whoever that...person...is/was/whatever. Time heals all wounds, and to your future happy self I say, congratulations.

Man I need your help. 19 now and the only thing I remember is "nailing" my cousin sister at the age of 7 or 8, cant remember and I really want to know how u nailed 30+ girls before 20 ??? Dude you are cool just forget about her and go back to changing girls like socks (dont recomend it though) or look for another even hotter chick.

Thanks everyone!! @Thatguy777: I'm too proud to ever be just friends with her. Fuck that.

I read all of it because I was in a very similar situation last year. I didn't cry as often, maybe once or twice every couple of weeks depending on the current situation which is more than I'd ever cry which would maybe happen once year. Anyway, the reason you can't stop thinking about her is because you were in love with her. Maybe you don't realize it, but that's what it was. And she was probably your first love, which just makes it harder.

I went through most of the same things you're going through. I met her last year and fell in love with her, ended up telling her how I felt, got rejected, and then the awkwardness came out. She didn't want to talk to me as much because of how I felt, and she ignored me which messed me up psychologiclly. Then I went through most of what you went through. Right now we aren't even friends, but I'm trying my hardest to work things out with her, because I still want to be friends with her, even though we can't be together. Best of luck to you and your situation.

I think you should keep a diary or something. Sounds like you needed to offload.

As to whether it's normal to feel like this, if you've been to this site before, you'd realise it is.