Is it normal to be somehow jealous of people's serious illnesses?

This has been bothering me for several months now, and I don't even understand it myself, which is why I'm asking...
So the thing is, I have read so many tragic stories online that have stuck with me. I notice that they're all very similar. They're about someone's significant other/parent being extremely ill (like having a terminal illness), often in the hospital. For some reason, I read these stories and simply cannot forget about them. Specifically, I read a story from Reddit's "saddest stories on Reddit." There was this one that was bad...a guy posted about his last moments holding his wife dying of brain cancer. He posted about this SPECIFIC moment between them, and it was only a short paragraph. Yet it affected me so deeply that I cannot explain in words...Like my breathing got faster, my stomach felt queasy, I started tearing up...I just cannot get it out of my head how much that guy must love(d) his wife. And I KNOW this sounds ridiculous because it's "just an Internet story." But not to me...I tend to take things in life very seriously and have a very good memory.
But my real question is this: I am somehow JEALOUS of the whole situation, but WHY????? If I knew why, trust me, I would not be asking this question! No matter how hard I try, I cannot pinpoint why I am jealous.
Do I wish I were the dying woman who had the husband who loved her to pieces, or the husband who had a wife he loved to pieces?
I've even started to "hypothesize" about why these stories affect me so much. Maybe I just want someone to love me that much? Could that really the whole issue? People talk about love all the time...I feel like I'm missing something, and that could be it...
And I am WELL AWARE that of course I shouldn't want to get some terrible disease, but I can't help think....that if I did have that disease, I guess my life (before I died from it) would be more meaningful, more deep. I would feel more "special." Because right now I feel like the most boring person. I've been very lucky in life, like no serious problems, most everything's been nice, so I feel guilty. That could be part of it.
I feel weak and pathetic, compared to people who go through such horrible events (terminal illness, car crash). It's like my life will never ever have the same intensity/beauty/tragedy of the lives of those people.
Maybe I view these people as tragic heroes or something...and I want to be like that.

I feel a tiny bit better having typed this out.

Is this thought process normal?